Well fat lot of good building up the strength to call someone for help did.
I started telling
DH about the suggested things to try & pretty mcuh straight off the bat he think its wont work its not worth it. When will he get time for him. He doesn't get home till7/7.30 some nights, and as soon as walks in we are putting kids to bed, when will he eat blah blah blah.
off to go secretly cry a bit more