Do councellors specialising in traumatic birth debriefs exist?

[danniellabella]

I'm not pregnant or TTC yet but DH is starting to talk about when we have another bub.

I had a really traumatic experience with the birth of DD 18 months ago. I was in labour for 36 hours. Pushing for goodness knows how long, more than 2 hours I think. When DD finally came out (after getting stuck and needing to be taken out with vacuum), she wasn't breathing. They put her on my chest and she was covered in muconium and not moving or crying or anything. Noone knew if she was alive. We waited for what felt like forever for her to breath. When I heard her cry I was so relieved. Then they whisked her off to neonates. I didn't get to see her for about an hour and a half. I couldn't have her in my room because she was on IV antibiotics. I couldn't take her home with me when I left the hospital.
Upon reflection, I'm so upset with the way the hospital staff treated me and didn't seem to care about how upset I was that I had to leave without my baby.

I'm terrified about having another baby ever.
I'm worried that I will freak out even more when we do get pregnant again and so I'm putting it off for as long as I can...I don't want to do it again.
Everyone says that you forget the labour, but I remember it vividly, like it was yesterday.

Are there councellors who specialise in helping women deal with this sort of thing? Should I see a professional to deal with my anxiety before we start TTC#2?

[MamaPan]

Personally if i felt how you do I would see someone - it will help you enjoy the next experience more... you dont want to spend your whole preg worried about this...
I dont know where you would find a specialist psych/counsellor but i am sure there are some..maybe ask you OB if you had one, or the hospital may know, or a social worker at the hospital? or you could call one of the 'helplines' like beyond blue who may know of someone?

[BellyBelly]

There are some out there, but they are few and far between. Some may do phone consults. I know in Melbourne, my teacher Rhea Dempsey does counselling but she may not over the phone. You can check out her site, Birthing Wisdom ::: Rhea Dempsey, Child Birth Educator

I'll put the word out for others and let you know. Most general counsellors or psychologists wont have the skills on this topic to help - but if you need help and can't find a birth debriefer, then please do see someone... I'll post back when I have more info.

[danniellabella]

Thanks so much Kelly. I saw your thing on Facebook about this...I feel very special now.

[BellyBelly]

No probs hon

[~Raven~]

I wasn't counselled by a birth specialist, but by a chaplain at the hospital where I birthed. I was able to get all of the medical reasons from the midwives and OB and she helped with the emotional side of it. The midwives recommended her and arranged for her to visit.
She was also able to tell me how to help DH who was suffering from shock after what he witnessed.

[Cassius2]

I recommend finding someone to de-brief this over with. Hopefully Kelly or someone can help you find a person that has the appropriate skills to walk the experience through with you.

I developed a PTSD after the birth of my DD and i have to say that it was only through counselling that i found myself able to approach the concept and joy of TTC #2. i went through the BB counsellor Lisa Fettling...she might know of someone in your state as she has been working with women and PND/birth related counselling circles for quite awhile now. her contact details (and maybe some info) are on her website lisafettling com au

just a thought...

[julie_ann_jules]

hopefully kelly can find someone for u to chat with
I had some sessions with my Independant midwife (I hired her for birth #3 after 2 horrible c/s) she talked thru my birth notes with me and explained exactly what happened and I talked... and talked... and talked and talked about my feelings and fears and concerns and things I was angry at. So maybe am IM might be able to help?!?!?!
Deffenetly have a chat with someone. Then you would be able to enjoy your pregnancy. I hadn't spoken to anyone before falling pregnant and I was devistated when I saw the BFP! I did enjoy my pregnancy and birth in the end after working thru my issues.

Its fantactic that u are listening to yourself and recognise that u need to see someone!

Jules

[BellyBelly]

Okay I have spoken to some people and the best bet would be to do it with an Independent Midwife in SA, because like I said, this profession of birth debriefing is very new but sadly we need it more and more. I would suggest an Independent Midwife before a psychologist - if they felt you needed psychology then I am sure they would refer you - but I would love to see you give an IM a go. SA has some amazing women there!

Here is a list of IM's in SA with a bit of a bio on them - give a few a call and see who you click with and are seeking debriefing.... good luck!!! I know a few of them and they are gorgeous, intelligent women. Homebirth Network of SA

[danniellabella]

Thanks Kelly. I really appreciate your help.

[danniellabella]

Oh cool! The midwife who actually saw me when I was pregnant and was there when I gave birth is on that list. Might have to give her a call.
She was working at the hospital I had DD in, I wonder if she's just doing independant stuff now.