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July 6th, 2009, 02:19 PM
|  | | | Join Date: May 2007 Location: Nth Brisbane, Qld
Posts: 4,997
| | Yes, it IS too much to ask...
GRRRRR!
Alll I want is for ONE WAKE-UP to not involve me. ONE. Not even one night. I've resigned already to the fact that I'll have to wake up a few times a night to Jazz. but is it TOO MUCH TO ASK for Shel to do ONE FRIGGEN WAKE-UP ONCE A WEEK? Not every night. Not even on nights when she works the next day. Just on ONE NIGHT A WEEK all I ask is that she get up ONCE and rock Jazz back to sleep.
She did last night, and after 5 minutes (not even...) she put her back down and left her to cry, and got back into bed.
So I got up, and snapped at her "oh, I forgot, she's my daughter at night, not our daughter".
I meant this as a sarcastic comment on the fact that she gets out of night duty, and has since day one. I can count on my hands the amount of times she's gotten up. But Shel got up, slammed doors, yelled and carried on... at 3am  So it became all about her. I think she was just feeling guilty about how TRUE that statement actually is.
Of course, after the commotion, Jazz didn't get back to sleep. So I've been up since 3am.
So yes, apparently it IS too much to ask that ONE WAKE-UP does not involve me.
It's not too much for her to expect that during the week NO wake-ups involve her. Actually, she gets ****ty if she so much as HEARS Jazz wake-up.
But of course, I can't even have a SLEEP-IN. Anything past 6am is a sleep-in these days. Despite giving her one every Sunday, I do NOT get one on Mondays.
__________________ Rainbow Mums: Leasha the full-time-working booby-mumma + Shel the full-time-SAHM
DD Jazz 05/08/08 40w1d: 8lb 6oz, 51cm  Believe nothing, no matter where you read it, or who said it, no matter if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense. (Buddha)
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July 6th, 2009, 02:21 PM
|  | Loving life with a beautiful family. | | Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: On a rollercoaster of change...
Posts: 2,408
| |
oh hun.
i'm so sorry this is happening.
Sending you lots of 
Hope you guys can work it out.
xx
__________________ 
Me  DH Since Sept 09 Our Bubba Princess - 20/08/2008 Bubba #2 due 19/05/10 Thank you sooo much for my RAK! | 
July 6th, 2009, 02:23 PM
|  | When your heart speaks, take good notes. - Judith Campbell | | Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: South Gippsland
Posts: 2,501
| |
No advice just offering a big cyber  it seems terribly unfair on you Leasha Come down to Vic and crash a night at my place then Shel will have to get up to little Jazz and give you ONE night off.
Nae x
__________________  Shae Alexis arrived 12/11/09 2hrs 28 min inc placenta start to finish- VBAC, Boob fed and cloth bummed  Nikita 25/5 - 2/6 2008,
m/c x2 - 07 & 09
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July 6th, 2009, 02:24 PM
|  | "We never touch people so lightly that we do not leave a trace."~~ Peggy Tabor Millin~~ | | Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Dapto, Illawarra...NSW
Posts: 2,309
| | Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Leasha~ So yes, apparently it IS too much to ask that ONE WAKE-UP does not involve me.  | I'm right there with ya hun...my DH has NOT got up ONCE in the night since Jack was born! But of course...they do have to go to work.  for you Leash.
__________________
Maz 35  DH 30 DD..17 DD..14 DS..9 DS22 months MazzleDazzle Designs~Personalised invitations and announcements for all occasions~ | 
July 6th, 2009, 02:25 PM
|  | I smile cause I have no idea what is going on :) | | Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: brisbane
Posts: 3,700
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Oh hun  Its really tough when you have to do it all hey  I know exactly how you feel  Hope you can work something out xx
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July 6th, 2009, 02:27 PM
|  | Is there an Arimeh at home? | | Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Blessedville
Posts: 10,728
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So I shouldn't complain about the fact that DH went to bed at 9pm last night with Miss M, and then I finally got to bed around 11 after cleaning up the kitchen, making his lunch etc, then she woke up at 11.40 and didn't go back to sleep until 2am and it was ME that had to get up with her.. then I got kicked and shoved by both aricyn and miss m until we all got out of bed at 6.30?
I was thinking that I should go off at him for that - but then I remember he usually gets up with Aricyn every morning and leaves me to sleep in till 7.30. So I'm uh.. not going to complain..
__________________
Mel
Co-creator of Aricyn (2007), Mehkelti (2008) and Eden (2009) Thank you for my RAK!! Very honoured to be P.I.G for MamaSpice | 
July 6th, 2009, 02:30 PM
|  | | | Join Date: May 2007 Location: Nth Brisbane, Qld
Posts: 4,997
| | Quote: |
So I shouldn't complain about the fact that DH went to bed at 9pm last night with Miss M, and then I finally got to bed around 11 after cleaning up the kitchen, making his lunch etc, then she woke up at 11.40 and didn't go back to sleep until 2am and it was ME that had to get up with her.. then I got kicked and shoved by both aricyn and miss m until we all got out of bed at 6.30?
|  You can complain, that does suck! You can't complain about the regular sleep-ins though
__________________ Rainbow Mums: Leasha the full-time-working booby-mumma + Shel the full-time-SAHM
DD Jazz 05/08/08 40w1d: 8lb 6oz, 51cm  Believe nothing, no matter where you read it, or who said it, no matter if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense. (Buddha)
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July 6th, 2009, 02:32 PM
|  | Moderator | | Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Funky Town, Vic
Posts: 8,355
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Hun, don't give Shel a sleep in anymore. She just doesn't deserve it xoxoxo
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July 6th, 2009, 02:37 PM
|  | Unworrying... | | Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 1,801
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July 6th, 2009, 02:39 PM
| | Random Act of Kindness Recipient | | Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Northcote, Melbourne
Posts: 2,383
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Leasha, what does she say when you discuss this? Does she agree to do it then just huff and puff when it comes to the crunch?
I'd also NOT be giving her a lie-in. She needs to understand that baby = less sleep for everyone and there needs to be a bit of give and take. At the moment it's all take on her part.
__________________ Fiona Me: 40 Handsome Partner: 47 DD: 15/08/2007 | 
July 6th, 2009, 02:40 PM
|  | Is loveing all the love xox | | Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: In the land of the 2WW...
Posts: 1,472
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Oh Leash... I have no advice either!! Sorry that you cant have your sleep in. Your welcome to crash here anytime with Jazz and I will get up to her and you can sleep ALL DAY..
Kate xox
__________________ Me (30) + My Man (35) + Our Princess(1!!) = TTC #2.... Now! Shhh... Feb 2008.
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July 6th, 2009, 02:41 PM
|  | Moderator | | Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Perth
Posts: 2,585
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Yeah, she doesn't need a sleep in if she sleeps all night. | 
July 6th, 2009, 02:43 PM
|  | | | Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: MN Coast NSW
Posts: 5,596
| |  I'm trying to get the same thing through DH's head.
'I was up with a sick baby last night, you're not working today...how about you get up & let me get some sleep??? '
Yeah right, & he wonders why I'm not inserested in the wandering hands that wake me up every single night lately! Then chucks a tanty, coz, yes, its all about him | 
July 6th, 2009, 02:45 PM
|  | 'a little ray of sunshine, has come into the world' ♥ | | Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 4,792
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I wouldn't be giving her a sleep in!!
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July 6th, 2009, 02:50 PM
|  | The more you know, the less you need. (Old Aboriginal saying) | | Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Melbourne
Posts: 7,728
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Oh dear  Maybe try pointing out that if you could get a bit of quality sleep then you would be a better partner as well as mummy. My DH has learnt this... and now I get at least 1 night a weeks deep proper sleep. Shell can contribute to your sleep deprivation and have an understandably psychotic partner or she can absorb a bit of the sleep loss and have a calmer partner... she can't have both. I hope I'm not out of line by saying that maybe Shell's empathy would be increased if she had the next baby? Sometimes people don't get it until they have walked in the shoes...  I know my DH will probably never be a SAHD but thankfully it doesn't have to come to that for him to feel a bit of compassion for my sleep loss.
*more hugs*
__________________ Be kinder than necessary because everyone is fighting some kind of battle.  DD 23rd Dec. 1994  DS 3rd Oct. 2003  DS 13th June 2006 GALLERY | 
July 6th, 2009, 04:06 PM
|  | Reclaiming Me - with the love of my beautiful little family xoxo | | Join Date: May 2006 Location: Brisbane, Australia
Posts: 520
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hey leash, without causing insult, i was sorta wonderig the same thing as bathsheba, that maybe she doesn't feel this responsibility as the baby is not 'hers'... oh god, that isn't meant to sound offensive, i just didn't really know how to put it.
but basically, you need to sit shell down and remind her that you guys went into this parenting thing as a partnership, and that she needs to do some of the hard stuff too - it's not just up to you to be sleep deprived and manky. when i have been feeling this way with dp, i remind him that i am not a single parent, and that i expect some help sometimes.
hope it all looks up and you get a decent sleep xoxo
__________________
Moi 25  He 31
Proud parents of...
Master X 29 Nov 2006  Blonde Haired, Blue Eyed, Cheeky Laughing, Mumma's Boy
Miss M 28 May 2008  Red-Headed, Bad-tempered, Co-Sleeping, Bottle Swilling Angel Just so easy when the whole world fits inside of your arms... | 
July 6th, 2009, 05:08 PM
| | whatever is good to know is difficult to learn | | Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: in a packing NIGHTMARE
Posts: 3,094
| | Quote:
Originally Posted by Lulu Hun, don't give Shel a sleep in anymore. She just doesn't deserve it xoxoxo |
If she can't let you have one night of decent sleep then, honestly, she doesn't deserve to sleep in.
If you want a night away - you're more than welcome down here with me for the night - with our without BubbaJazz
__________________ with from Punks  Final plans are being made, packing is being done, new life to begin BEFORE I turn 40! (since life supposedly begins at 40) | 
July 6th, 2009, 06:13 PM
|  | Live, Laugh, And Love With A Houseful Of Boys! | | Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: Tassie
Posts: 2,594
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hugs hun, its tough ...
Maybe if you try to think of it as expecting Jazz to wake up, and expecting you to have to get up to her it will be easier. Instead of expecting a sleep in YK. Change the way your thinking, not the situation |  | | | Thread Tools | | | | Display Modes | Linear Mode |
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