As most of you are aware I`m a Step Mum to Mark`s two boys - Michael who is 12 and Alister who will be 11 on 2nd June. They are both very good boys, like most children they do have there moments.
We have the boys every other weekend - pick up Friday after school and we drop them back Monday morning for School and also have then for half of the School Holidays.
When they are with there Mum I gather they don`t have to do too much around the house as when we have them I have to pick up after them like they are 6 years old, just simple things like picking up lolly papers off the floor, putting their bath towels back on the airer, making their beds, clothes and shoes are left throughout the house and outside, toys are left lying around on the bathroom sink. They seem to make such an awful mess and just leave it all for me to come and tidy up after them. Am I asking too much to ask them to tidy up after themselves or should I just be keeping my mouth closed and do it myself.
This morning both DH and I asked them to sweep and mop the bathroom and kitchen floors as it gets too much for me and we thought they should be quite capable. We got a lot of why do we have to do it, why can`t you?? They did eventually do it or should I say Michael did it all - we told them one could sweep and one could mop but apparently Alister doesn`t know how to sweep or mop so Michael did it all.
Now this is really making me wonder why a boy of 11 doesn`t know how to sweep or mop floors and both weren`t impressed by us asking them to do it - Don`t kids especially boys have to do housework to help out??
What are your views on children of this age helping out. My Dad grew up having to do housework every weekend and he had 4 sisters but still had to do chores. I remember having to help Mum with the housework when I was young also. Are we asking too much of them??
I have 3 brothers, and all my SIL who married them all praise my Mum big time as my brothers are all men who have no problem with chores: all of them cook, clean and just get on with whatever needs doing.
One of my SIL's also has mentioned to me that she loves that her DH (my brother) not only does the jobs, but doesn't expect 4 hours of adulation for doing it!
My Mum wasn't strict so much, but certainly as kids we ALL had chores to do, indoors, and outisde the house, and I do remember my Mum "teaching" the boys how to cook, and certainly we all pitched in with all jobs such as mopping/bathroom cleaning etc. (As such I can also turn my hand to moving the lawn, cleaning out gutters etc!)
Ladies, I`m glad you all think the same way as me, makes it so difficult to try to train the boys when they don`t need to do chores at their Mums place or so I`m lead to believe. Looks like I`m going to have to try harder to get them trained afterall a little bit helps.
My son's daycare mum has taught him to pick up after himself. (Thank goodness!) He also has a cleaning fetish... he loves picking up the broom and the mop and cleaning the floor, he also has his own sponge which he cleans the floor, doors, carpet etc with. He says "dirty" and scrubs it down!
My step son Noah is 7 and we make him clean up - I don't think his mum makes him do much at home, but bad luck. My 2 step daughters, Bonnie 7 and Georgia 9, will clean well, Georgia without being asked.
Noah will grumble, and try to avoid doing any work, and is told if he doesn't help he will do the lot. We also will give liitle treats like chocolates or lollies to who does clean up.
We also have problems with differences between their mums and our house, but as DH and I have been together since they were 1 and 3 they are used to it.