There are plenty of new things to learn when you become a mama.
But when you become a mama to a little boy, you have even more to learn!
Apart from stereotypical or social constructs that can make having a little boy a wild new adventure, their biology is quite different from ours.
And that biology also seems to have quite a big part in their day to day activities… likely far more than you ever imagined.
Their penis seems to be their favourite body part, and a big part of their day.
If you already have a little boy, these things aren’t likely to surprise you.
If you’re expecting a boy or just gave birth to one, don’t be afraid of this list! While little boys are certainly a different creature than their mama, you’ll find you enjoy them despite not always understanding why on earth they seem obsessed with their penis.
What Mamas Need To Know About Their Son’s Penis
Here are 5 things to know about little boys and their penis:
#1: The Angle Matters. Seriously.
Nearly every baby, boy or girl, has peed without a nappy/diaper on. In fact, my daughter has peed on me more in her short eight weeks of life than her brothers every did.
However, little boys have quite the reach! When you open the nappy/diaper for a change, be sure he’s not pointing upwards. Otherwise, you, your baby and your freshly laundered clothes neatly stacked over a foot away could be christened.
When you put his nappy/diaper on, it’s important to make sure everything is pointing down.
I know you’re probably sleep deprived, but this is important intel to remember when you’re on the battlefront, soldier. It can be like an out of control firehose out there.
And make sure it’s straight down too, not to the side. If his penis is pointed up or to the side, you might find him completely soaked. I’ve changed my sons’ urine soaked clothes only to find the nappy completely dry! Angle matters… it matters a lot.
A peepee teepee can be a wise investment for mamas of newborns!
#2: It’s Not As Fragile As You Imagine
Accidentally hurting your little boy during a nappy change isn’t something to be overly worried about. It’s always good to be gentle during changes, but chances are it’s not nearly as fragile as you imagine. This will be evident as soon as your little guy discovers he can reach it.
Little boys tend to tug, twist and manipulate it in ways that might surprise you. However, it’s highly unlikely they’ll break it. At most, they might find themselves a bit sore. Unfortunately, this won’t deter them from twisting and tugging again as soon as the soreness resolves.
#3: You’ll Say Things You Never Thought You’d Ever Have To Say
“Do you need to pee? No? Then please put it back in your pants.”
“We only take our privates out to use the potty.”
“Please get your hands out of your pants and go wash your hands.”
Perhaps it’s not completely surprising that boy mamas must say the above.
However, you’re likely to become shocked at just how often you must say these things. The good news, eventually little boys do learn a bit of modesty.
#4: It’ll Be A Popular Topic Of Conversation
For some reason, discussing their penis can be a pastime for little boys. It might come up when you least expect it, and often with a giggle.
This is often funny for parents too, the first time or two, but then you start to get a bit worried they’ll say something during Christmas dinner in front of grandma. Or perhaps even more mortifying, during learning time at preschool.
Just like they learn to stop touching it or taking it out of their pants when they’re not in the bathroom, they learn about inappropriate times to discuss their penis.
We have a no potty jokes rule for most situations to help prevent the embarrassing call from the preschool director. But even if a call happens, anyone with a little boy will likely understand this just happens to be a favourite topic among boys.
#5: It Provides Your Bathroom With A Unique Odour
Boy urine doesn’t inherently have a unique odour, but when it’s on the toilet rim, floor, and worst of all the toilet seat, well that dried urine odour sure changes the aromas of your bathroom.
Aim matters. Little boys can be taught to aim properly, but even according to adult men, sometimes the penis just doesn’t cooperate. It’s somewhat hard to believe because it seems designed to aim. Given the amount of urine on my bathroom floor, however, I want to believe that more than my boys just not bothering to try.
Whatever the real reason for all the misplaced urine, your bathroom will need to be cleaned often to avoid that unique odour. Little boys can and should be taught to wipe up after themselves, but inevitably, a mother’s touch is usually needed to keep the urine smell at bay.
[Highly!] Recommended Reading: Raising Boys by Steve Biddulph – a MUST for all parents of boys!
Have you encountered any unexpected events as a parent of a little boy? Share them in the comments section below.