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Hey Amethyst I did it! And I'd do it again too. (looking into doing my masters at the moment)
I was doing uni part time (2 subjects) and working 2 days a week while preg. I did defer right at the end as I had complications, but had bub in the Nov and started back following feb (not working though). DH great support. Just have a plan for those times when you are tired.
My 2 cents . ...go with what your body says and don't get dishearted by others
:D
Amethyst, sorry if what I wrote was upsetting to you, it was not intended to be. I was not aware that your original post was intended as light hearted or that you were looking for an affirmation. I interpreted from the perspective that you had not made up your mind and were simply looking for suggestions, thats the problem with writing everything we don't get to hear each others tone or voice or see each others body language :).
All I was trying to offer was my experience. I ended my last post by wishing you luck with your decision making. Which ever option to go with will be the best one for you I am sure. I again offer you my well wishes for both your study life and family. You sound like an intelligent and informed person who knows what is best for her at heart. Your children will be lucky to have a mum who is able to think things through from all angles. :)
I think everyone posted to this thread in good faith Amethyst and to help you. I am genuinely sorry that you didn't feel this way and hope you post again. No-one was being deliberately judgmental to your situation. BB people are good people and you are very welcome here- people aren't setting out to hurt you. They just offer their opinion, thoughts and experiences to assist others.
Amethyst,
You can do it. I am currently in the process. I am studying Business (Majoring in Human Resource Management). I should be completing my degree 2009 July. This semester, June exams, my baby girl was 2 weeks when I sat for my first exam. I was pregnant and attending classes and exams last year in November. I started studying on the 2nd or 3rd day after giving birth. I despised the comments I received from the Nurses, while in hospitals. Their comments were discouraged considering the fact that they have already obtained a degree. I found it even more insulting because I felt as though they underestimated me because of my age and having a baby. Nevertheless, I had to defer my second exam. My baby girl was 2 months when I sat for the second exam. I was taking 3 subjects last semester. Now, my baby girl is 3 months and I am taking 3 subjects. I am turning 22 this month. I believe you can do it. Ignore all negative comments. Mind you, I only have my husband for support. No doubt, I find myself playing with the baby at times instead of doing extra studying. She should be 6 months in November, when my exams are scheduled. My husband was the only supportive person. My classmates were surprised I came to the exam without a tummy, Lol. For me, this is only a temporary disadvantage which I am taking it as an advantage, for the better future of my darling daughter. I want to provide for her. Give her everything she wants. In the meantime, I have to make baby noises from my study desk. But once I am finished, she has my undivided attention.
Macca, no your post was one of the helpful ones and i didnt feel at all hurt by your reply. The way you responded confirmed what was in the back of my mind. So thank you.
Deidre - maybe people werent being deliberately judgemental, but there was definitely judgemental tones to some of the responses. Your first reply was awesome by the way, what you wrote hit home and resonated within me.
I guess the implication that I was being selfish really upset me. Why should my life need to be put on hold or stopped because I want to be a mother as well as have my own identity? and shouldnt other mothers be supportive and compassionate towards other mothers who are trying to bite off more than they can chew - shouldnt they be the ones who understand better than anyone how hard things are, trying to wear so many hats in today's society?
Maybe I did overreact slightly, but i really dont care to read that i need to think about the other students in the class (would they consider me?), i really dont care to be judged against other mothers who studied and didnt ensure their child or baby wasn't a distraction (i'm neither that selfish or irresponsible) - i didnt ask for those responses, i asked whether from a studying mother's point of view was it possible and please tell me I am nuts for remotely considering the possibility....
I wish the ones who have posted since my last post had come along earlier - i am in awe that so many mums have done it and succeeded. It is possible and its also darn hard - and that is what I wanted to know!
Girl 22 - wow well done! I am really impressed. I'd be in the same boat - no other support but my DH. Its great to hear that with determination, anything is possible. Good luck with the rest of your studies!
Amethyst,
You are expecting in November, right? How old are you and what do you plan on studying? Remember, uni starts late Febuary, so you have time to send with the baby. I am a first time mum.
Nah... Not pregnant yet. I plan on studying part time next year which will be one contact day a week only, and TTC around june so that the baby is born early in 2010 - take that year off to spend with bubs and then finish the second half of my studies in 2011. Thats the logical sane plan...
The crazy plan was to try and get pregnant between now and December so the baby would be born mid second semester next year, aiming for say August, so its before exams in november and the baby is small enough to be a sleeping feeding thing - again taking it to uni one day a week. That the trying to have my cake and eat it too plan....
I'm in my mid 30's - i dont have many baby years left ahead of me, which explains the fact I am questioning whether I can do the two things simultaneously - I dont feel i necessarily have the luxury of achieving one thing at a time. I need the career and I would like another child. I cant see which can be placed on hold at this stage in my life and would hate to sacrifice one for the other just because I made a choice to be an older parent and was stuck in a career path that unfortunately turned out to be the wrong choice for me. If i knew then what I did now, i would have studied the right uni course after highschool and i would have started my family when I was in my early 20's.... hindsight's a beautiful thing!
Amethyst,
Sorry but what does TTC stand for? I am fairly new to this site. I have not caught on yet. What course do you plan on studying? To me, you sound very determined. Go for it. Don't sacrifice either one. I would advice you to juggle both and whoever calls you 'crazy' for doing so, you should make such comments your motivation factor. In the end, you will have had a baby and also a degree in another area of study.
Girl22: there is a list of acronyms (abbreviations) in the Forum help section.... that should help... I know how confusing it can be when you first join up :) TTC = Trying To Conceive
Amythyst: I'm sorry this thread has upset you and I hope I haven't contributed to this. What tends to happen in forums like this is that posters can respond to the situation rather than the person. I know it's hard not to take it personally sometimes. I guess it's a short-coming of the medium. Like Deidre said people rarely intend to be hurtful... it just seems that way due to a lack of intonation and body language... it's a limitation of the medium of online conversations. Posters often read a scenario like yours and respond too broadly... kinda using the subject as a "concept" rather than one belonging to a real living person with feelings and unique take on it IYKWIM (if you know what i mean). Because we often have child-generated chaos in the background as we type we also can post things too quickly and thoughtlessly. Not excusing this... just outlining why. Probably keep in mind that when a thread is started it often takes a life of it's own... you do kinda have to relinquish control to a certain extent. God knows how many threads i have started and the topic meanders all over the place... or I myself have gone off topic... once again: that's a limitation of the medium. Many people would have simply seen a thread about "studying with a newborn" and thought to themselves: Oh, I have an opinion on that... and not tailored it specifically to your situation.
Anyhow i hope you can continue to enjoy BellyBelly. Basically I would suggest you take what is helpful and dismiss the rest.... which is kinda how things work in real life too ;)
It would be great if you could make it work... whatever you decide... then you could post about some strategies and solutions that have worked for you... or have not worked for you. Studying with childen is kind of a hot topic here in BB and all perspectives and experiences are interesting! :)