*Vent and Advice* Smoking around my kids

Yes Gigi it's so darn hard.
I absolutely love my mum but her smoking is the one thing that causes me grief about her. I really wish she would quit, it would change so many things. I would be so much more at ease when visiting them. It is hard, she has never tried to quit, she says she wouldn't be able to do it but the truth is she loves it too much I think. I will try again. Straight to the point and firm like I have been in the past but I really don't want this to cause a rift. I hope that she will finally see it from my point and if I come armed with proof of the impact second hand smoke has then maybe that will help. Does anyone know where I can get my hands on those kinds of pamphlets? I feel sick to my stomach knowing I have to sit down and talk to her about this again.

I know it's a UK website, but try http://www.nhs.uk/livewell/smoking/p...ngnewhome.aspx - it's the NHS and they have had a big stop smoking push in the last couple of years. The following part of an article about the top reasons people use to stop smoking and may be useful to you (links removed).

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Quit when you become a grandparent
Why quit? You probably want to spend as much time with your new grandchild as possible, but if you smoke you could be harming the baby’s health. Consider how your son or daughter may feel about you smoking around their baby.

Children who breathe in secondhand smoke are at more risk of cot death or conditions including allergies, asthma, chest infections and breathing problems.

Moving to the other side of the room to smoke, or even into another room, doesn’t completely remove the risk.

Even if you open a window, or move to a different room, secondhand smoke will still be present in a room after two-and-a-half hours. Even if you can't see or smell any smoke, it's probably still there. Smoking in a car is even worse because all of the smoke is concentrated into a small space.

Stay motivated: Tell yourself that you’re quitting not only for your own health, but that of your grandchild. And don’t be put off by the fact you may have been smoking for many years. A recent study by the UK Centre for Tobacco Studies found that older smokers using NHS stop-smoking services are more likely than younger ones to quit successfully.

Read about the risks of passive smoking and how the NHS can help you to stop smoking.

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Also ring Quitline. 137848. Tell them your situation and they can send you out a help pack.

There's much more to this than smoking - it's the principle of "I am in charge of my kids' health and I don't want you messing with it". Otherwise you will always be wondering if they are safe when they are there later on without you.
I would be trying to meet up at outside venues for a while, and not going to her house. If she asks why then be very honest - to protect my babies' lungs.

I agree. When we bought our prem baby home we had to explain and limit more than smokers.

Even now we still have the 'junk food/no junk food' argument with grandparents. Not directly health threatening, but when you have a mum who has type 2 diabetes and still doesn't eat healthy.....

You are their mum, you are strong!

Thanks :)
Yes the junk food one is a hard one hey Chrispe? I have a SIL who thinks I'm such a mean mum because I don't give my two yr old junk food.