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i work in child care and i advise that you DO say good bye, and that you will be coming back. (for the reasons mentioned above already). at first they wil cry but it is better that way, cause if they have an explanation and over time it is carried through they will put two and two together and understand. better than being distracted then 5 -10 mins later look up to show mummy something and they are gone. try and make a fun ritual at drop off time, like waving through a special window, or something like that. ask you day care teacher if they have a special place to do that sort of thing, often there is. i know it is really hard, my DD still cries at times when i have to go.
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yep another one here who says good bye - sometime it is easier than others... but i think it is important - they are smart little things and i hate the thought of him thinking i am there and then turning around and i have disappeared! i think he will learn to trust that i am coming back if he sees the same pattern all the time. sometimes he starts crying as soon as i get my keys (at fdc) so i just tell him 'mummy has to go to work, i will be back this afternoon' - carer says he is ok within a couple of minutes.
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I know - I have to bite the bullet - you are all absolutely right - but it's so hard... I hope it doesn't take long for her to stop getting distressed.... sounds like it is an ongoing thing where they are sometimes fine with it, sometimes not. Will steel myself and try it out tomorrow (fingers crossed)....
