Newborn sleep patterns? Advice needed and not coping vent.

Hang in there. You are doing all the right things for your fresh little bubba.

If your DS likes movement, I wonder if he'd like an Amby Baby Hammock?

At around exactly that age I was having the same thoughts about why did I have a baby. It's rough but believe me, you are not alone. It will pass soon. If it doesn't then please talk to someone about PND.

Has the Zantac helped? Is he struggling with wind, and tummy aches, what are his poohs like?

Where does he sleep? Would he sleep better in a cosleeper bassinet next to? During the day you could babywear while you do housework. Being upright will help with reflux and really he is so little and young it's not a bad habit to let him sleep on you in a carrier while you have your hands free.

PS Burn Save Our Sleep and buy the No Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantley. Realistic advice and kind methods.

He likes to sleep with his hands up near his face or with his chin resting on them. He sucks on his hands and arms alot. We do give him a dummy but its hard as it comforts him but as soon as it falls out he wakes up screaming for it. He will only sleep on his tummy right now so I don't know whether to keep letting him or not. I think we do have wind issues as he is most unsettled after a feed. I add infants friend to his bottles which helps but sometimes it's hard to get the burps up. I admit at night I don't try as hard as I just want to go back to sleep. His poos are fine he normally does one in the middle of the night and they are quite runny. His pattern seems to be wake up, feed, squirm around and be unsettled for 3-4 hours, have another feed, repeat unsettled behaviour for another 3ish hours, fall into an exhausted deep sleep for 3ish hours. It's only during these deep sleeps that we can get him in the bassinet. The rest of the time he is being held by one of us as he won't settle on his own. Some days I find acceptance and then there are moments like now where I don't know how I will get through this as I don't want to spend my time resettling and holding him constantly and then I feel guilty for feeling that way.

I did think about the Amby hammock but I can't find one to hire and DH will kill me if I buy another thing that doesn't work. As he won't go in the swing when unsettled I'm guessing the hammock would be the same?

I don't know much about bottle feeding, but have you looked at different formulas or different teats with a slower flow. 3 hours of squirming after a feed sounds like a lot to me. Perhaps some bottle feeders could help?

it's not an easy transition. does he burp well after feeds? will he take a dummy? I had a really rough time with DS1s sleep and the best advice I have is to sleep whenever he does. even if it's only for 20 mins. just rest and conserve energy. If he won't settle, wear him in a wrap or sling. baby is comfy, happy and close to mamas heartbeat. I read somewhere that babies who are carried in a sling for 2-3hrs a day cry 40% less. something like that anyway. It's helped me immensely!

babywearing is also helpful with reflux and I would highly recommend using it as a tool to go out and get things done without all the crying and people staring. definitely make the most of his deeper sleeps by resting yourself- not going out. do that when he's awake. :)

My DS1 is nearly 3 and I have a 6mth old as well now. naps are what keep me alive at this point lol. nobody messes with my naptimes.

Lastly, it'll take a little while but you will relax and learn to parent by instinct. Do you bedshare? Another of my sleep deprivation weapons :) it's absolutely normal to feel overwhelmed and upset. Even regretful or terrified. But I promise it'll be second nature to you soon. What was your birth like? Overcoming a traumatic experience can really impact on your resilience.

:hug:

you're doing an awesome job.

Oh yes DS1 was bottle fed and I used a thickened formula specifically for reflux. it helped a lot as well as slower flowing teats. also look for high quality bottles with anti colic um.. thingy. lol. It'll be written on the box. I used Avent and they were great.

Some other ideas to help calm him are baby massage, soft music, singing to him, rhythmic patting and jiggling. All babies are so different. DS1 is a jiggler and DS2 is into firm rhythmic bum patting. it takes a while to work out what they like most.

Everyone has lots of great ideas and advice. Just wanted to say... This too shall pass xo

I found that letting go was a huge help. I stopped tracking when DD slept, and gave in to sitting on the couch with a bub attached to my boob for 3 hours every night while she cluster fed. I was lucky she slept at night, but I kept getting 'advice' that she needed more sleep in the daytime, so we tried to get her to nap, unsuccessfully.
once I stopped thinking about it, things were so much easier.
DS slept until 6 months and stopped, and its been 10 months with minimal sleep. Im kind of zen about it now, and nap when I can, plus DH and I take turns getting up at stupid oclock when DS decides its morning time, so I get a 3 hr block of sleep every second day, which gets me through.