Here's a blast from the past - my Mum bought the bright orange plastic ones for my brothers who are a year and two years younger than me respectively, and my third brother also used one (who is 6 years younger than me). So she was using them 30 + years ago :lol:
I'm guessing Mum got them because my brothers were bolters - I don't remember wearing one myself. Quite frankly I don't think she cared about comments but I'll have to ask her!
my DD1 loves her puppy backpack. TBH i thought they looked awful before I found that I really needed something to give me security that she was still by my side in a shop.
When you're standing paying for something with both hands opening your wallet, at least I know I can have a hold of her through the reins on my wrist.
I found it actually liberating for DD1 who wanted to walk - great for her for exercise but gave me the security she was safe (away from the road or not running out of a shop etc).
I actually only needed to use it for maybe 6 months until DD1 reached an age where she could talk and follow my instruction i.e. come back to mummy , please!! and the impulse for her to run away seemed to have lessened.
My parents also loved it as it meant they could take her for a walk and feel secure they had control over her if they needed to. We would never have tension on the lead and when crossing the road, holding hands was/is insisted upon. It is just a safety net really.
I think it depends how you present them. I've met one little guy who brought his in to kindy as a bit of a show and tell piece, wanted to wear it all day. TBH I have no idea why the family even owned one; he is the most placid kid, who loves his mummy way too much to escape. But he loved his puppy backpack and loved being taken for a walk - he thought of it as a toy. I love the independence that the backpack part gives them - most children at the bolting age are into collecting "things" - which I love to encourage.
If it's something that is forced upon them, well, of course, that's different.
Got mine at Target in Melbourne. I have seen one at the local Kmart down here. I think Mothers Direct now sell them online.:
I only used the wrist strap ones from time to time. My second one needed it the most and I would get the odd comment, but honestly I would rather listen to ignorant comments than have a dead or missing child. If anyone doesn't like them, then don't use them, but I fail to see how it is something to be judged for kwim? Surely the child's safety is paramount and if that means Mum find that a harness works best for her then so be it.
i feel so much better having read this thread. i actually just bought a monkey one off ebay on friday and am waiting for it to arrive (there's heaps of different ones on there for those of you asking where to get one from) and was really nervous about being judged for using one- but as others have said, it's better than having a dead or injured child.
We have just been overseas and used one for the 1st time.. It was fantastic. Having a toddler who wants to walk around while waiting in queues would have been unbearable without it!
Then we got back to Brisbane, there were some backpackers who commented on how cool it was, LOL..
My DD is also quite socialable and will just go to people, it is also peace of mind that I would feel if she is being tugged away..
Yes, some might say it is like having a dog on a leash, but my DD's safety is much more important than what those people think..
we have the green frog backpack - Fia loves the frog but was a little edgy when I attached the strap, she knows that she cannot run away now.
Alright, I'm sold. I'm getting one.
Reading this thread, it occured to me that maybe it's the way they are used as well? Noone likes to see a small child being dragged along by their backpack like they are a disobdiant animal- I don't even like seeing dogs treated like that. It seems most people use them like a safety catch- hold hands and keep the parental control, but have the piece of mind there that if they do bolt, they're not going very far.
Bj, I loved your post. But unfortunately, i know people- actually, the same couple who commented on the backpack idea- that do see a playpen as akin to a dog cage, and just as bad as a 'toddler leash'. Probably cause for a whole other discussion, but I'm so looking forward to when they have kids of their own :lol:
As a teen I remember thinking it was kind of weird to see kids on a "leash" but since having my own, I totally understand why parents decide to get these things. It keeps your child safe, and gives them some freedom too. Anyone with kids will understand, and those without kids might not understand, but I'll bet they'd look at you a little more strangely if your child was running wild and getting into dangerous situations.
I'm not a fan, but at the same time would use one if I had to...if that makes sense. As for playpens.. not a fan of them either LOL.. they're just not very big, so seem a bit mean. Ours ended up around the tv :) We have an entire area/room gated off and babyproofed for when the kids need to be locked in somewhere LOL.
With the leashes.. our 3 year old runs off a bit.. but I wouldn't ever want to restrain a 3yr old. What ages have you used them on? I've always thought they were for little toddlers like 18mths or something.
having grown up in a house where mum did FDC (back when FDC meant the kids going everywhere and being a real part of the family a lot of the time) i grew to appreciate the harnesses for some of the kids - there are some kids that really need that extra safety back up! i love the backpack ones that are available now, and i think they take so much of the stigma away from having your child on a "leash"
mum looked after a couple of kids that bolted no matter what - one had cerebal palsy and simply had no concept of what was safe so she had ot have a harness unless she was seated in the trolley - this went right up until she was six and left care. her little brother had CP also, but he had no choice but to be in a pram or trolley as his was very severe
another little girl was just "one of those kids". mum and dad live on the corner of a court, and A lived (and does again now) a few houses into the court. she was just one of those kids that didn't like restrictions - by the time she was three, her parents had approached every family in the court about her - she could get out of their house and yard no matter what restrictions they put in place. so A was given run of the court - down to our front gate. everyone in the court loved (and still love) her, and she would just pop by, visit etc, and when it came close to dinner time, one of us would escort her home. this little girl could get out of ANY situation, and decided one day to do a runner on mum in spotlight - she was missing for 45 minutes, police called, all management and staff, customers etc looking for her. she was hiding under the material tables, moving from one table to the next following mum cso she just didnt' want to come out - she was 3 - after that, she had to have a harness on her to stop her wandering off! kids like this need to be restrained to a degree for their own safety. thankfully A was the kind of kid to want to follow mum and found it amusing to see mum look for her - but in that amount of time, anything could have happened...
FWIW - A is now 22 and only grew out of her escapism behaviour in her late teens - she was just that kid that didn't like barriers all her life. i think she's only really settled down since being in a car accident in which her best friend was killed when she was 19 (she was hurt badly and spent months in hospital as well) - she has changed a lot since then - but up until then, she really seemed to have no limit to what she'd do...
Liz, I only ever used it for the initial weeks after having another baby (so when they were 20ths)and you have to boot the older one out of the pram LOL and until they work out that they have to stay with you, or hold onto the pram it was good to use kwim? For me, the problem was just the novelty of not being restrained in the pram so they were a bit adventurous at first and testing the boundaries. My first was really good hardly used it at all for him but my second was different, she was a heck of a lot more defiant (and I say that with much love ;) ) so she needed it for a bit longer. I never used it with my third cause there was just no need to and probably wont use it for Alister either as he will be the only one at home by the time he's too big for a stroller, even though he is a bugger of a kid (again I say that with much love LOL) and he is a bolter, I will only have to wrangle one child.
I think they're fantastic. I haven't used one as DD2 wouldn't put it on, but I think they're great. I would much much much prefer to get evil looks with a child wearing one, than the evil looks I'd get if I lost my child!! Very sensible idea I think xo
4.5 yrs ago when there was not the back pack ones around, I had the walking harness for dd2, this was my last resort, just before christmas when she stripped naked and ran around kmart, she was so tiny she could slide under the stands etc, after 30 min chassing her and everyone laughing I finnally got hold of her and dressed her, marched straight out to myers and brought one there. She wore it for about 3 months till she learnt to hold my hand and not run off. I used it by having the lead bit over my wrist so when she pulled out of my hand I could catch her before she ran off.
I got alot of negative comments but also some positve ones too. I think it is better to be safe than sorry. Resently the same child has started to bolt and as I still have the harness, I used it as a threat ie if you keep running off I will get it out again, this stopped her in her tracks.
So I think they are great for safety reasons.
oh dear SweetPea! Does sound gorgeous though!
I think the worst time with us was when we were at the Melbourne Flower & Garden Show when Pip took the bolt and the leash stopped him short .. luckily in tan bark ... and he literally jerked into the air and fell on his butt. I'm glad I had it on him then, as there were so many people he could have really gotten lost ...
We used ours for the first time today and I liked it a lot. My thoughts were these:
it actually gives DD more freedom. I used it for going for a walk to the shops at the end of our streets and around the block. It means she can walk ahead of me for a metre and a halfish and gives me the peace of mind that she can't just bolt into the road (which she has done a couple of times without it on).
It also meant that I was happier to let DD explore because I knew she couldn't get too far. So that meant she went into every single shop doorway and closed every single house gate on the way home. I'm not kidding. But I'm much happier to LET her do that when I know that she can't actually run up someone's driveway and I'll have to run after her if she does.
I did get a lot of stares. I couldn't work out if people were thinking "ahhh ... how cute" (though I did get a couple of those comments) OR whether people were thinking, "how ridiculous is that, why is she letting that child go into every single shop doorway when she could just shove her in a pram and make her life easier," OR whether they were thinking, "how cruel is that, having a baby on a lead."
It didn't completely solve all my problems. One of the reasons I got it is that I have a dodgy back so continually running after DD and having to physically restrain her from running into dangerous situations is really painful for me. I did still have to pick her up when crossing the road a few times as she refused to hold my hand - that resulted in a meltdown and kicking off of shoes (!) so yeah, not great for my back while trying to bend over for a kicked-off shoe while carrying kicking and screaming DD ... but on the whole, well worth it for peace of mind.
I ended up buying one at the baby expo the other day. It worked so well while we were there. The next day when we tried to use just resulted in meltdowns like the one Fiona mentioned :rolleyes:
I saw somebody with one of these for the first time the other day. It was a little monkey one, looked adorable. I'm not sure whether we will use one, I think it will depend on what type of toddler DD ends up being! If it would help with her though (if she is a runner etc), I wouldn't have reservations using one.
We have 2 puppies and a monkey somewhere. I will need to get DH to find them very soon. DD1 is likely to get jealous of DD2 wearing one even when DD1 doesnt need it anymore. DD1 was a bolter but has settled down now, and DD2 is a bolter now. DD1 likes the responsibility of being trusted to go without a harness. I am likely to pull out all 3 harnesses and let them choose what they wear but DD1 won't have the leash attached.
Over 30 years ago my cousin was saved from falling off a cliff by wearing her leather harness. There is a reason they have hung around so long. As much as I love my dog, my kids' safety means more to me than his, and he would bolt if he had the chance when we take him for walks. I think that until people who don't like them have been in the situation to need one then people in glass houses shouldn't throw stones.
I'll duck for cover now....:lol::lol:
I hate them. I think they look disgusting and sooo disrespectful. I would hate someone to put me in a harness, even it was pretty. I trapse 6 kids around and have never needed or used one.
When teaching my kids to walk with me safely, they must hold my hand. If they dont, straight into the trolley, immediatly. I will do this over and over till its sinks in. If they are too young to learn safety, then I lock them up.. pram or trolley.
Kane isn't even 2, and after a few months of putting him in a trolley for walking off, he now walks with us all perfectly, same as all the others learnt. Being good = freedom.
Maybe I've been lucky!! :p
That being said, I understand why people use them. I would much prefer to see a harness on a child than a child on the road. ;)
PB - I do think you have been very lucky. Either that or you have more patience and fitness than I do. I can't keep up with the girls when they run off - even when I am well - and have been in the situation where they have run into carparks before so I much prefer prevention at the moment. If we lived in a different culture I would still be wearing them while they are in the running off stage, but I can't so I do what is the next best for them (Oh and they can get out of 5 point harnesses on the pram and car seat) and they get some exercise.
I use one, its a lifesaver (literally once - during an incident involving a very fast toddler, my hands full with another toddler AND a baby in a busy carpark). Ds loves his 'frog frog pakpack'.
When you have 3 kids under 2.5 who weigh ALOT so it gets difficult to carry one of them while the other two are restrained in a pram/trolley; and a 2.5yo who insists on walking but has zero concept of safety and staying within boundaries - then tell me they are horrible devices.
ETA - on rare occasions my child will be the one sitting on a shop floor screaming his bollocks off while I tug on the backpack lead trying to entice him to get up and moving. We always give him a choice of pram or backpack - and sometimes he doesnt like either of those because he wants to walk without the backpack but I absolutely cannot chase an errant toddler while pushing a huge double pram with another toddler + baby in it. And he will run and run fast+far. My biggest fear is him being stolen or getting lost and being hit by a car because I didnt make him wear the backpack whether he wanted to or not - or even worse the other two being stolen in/from the pram because Ive had to leave it in order to chase/find him. I could never live with myself. So if making him wear it is forcing him then guilty as charged. He'll understand and probably be glad I did one day when he has to worry about the safety of an exuberant and independent toddler who THINKS they are old enough to run around willy nilly when they arent.
So far no one has even dared comment negatively about it, but Im guessing I look like a scary, stressed out lady and no one would be game enough too haha
I have one for DS, who is not quite 1. I got it because he is just too young to understand, and too squirmy in the pram that he needs to be allowed to walk sometimes. I try to have him hold my hand as well as using the backpack, and he is learning, but I so like the security of the strap.
Dh hated the thought at first but he is a convert now too.
I had my fair share of friends query my use of Monkey Backpack, but seeing us with DS and it they all came round in the end...
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Exactly why I understand people using them. I would rather you got your 3 (soon!) girls home safe, then have something terrible happen. ;)
Just as folks have the right to love them, folks also have the right to hate them!!! :D
i have no kids but personally i hate them, i hate seeing kids on them...but i mean once i have kids i may feel differently but at this point in my life i dont think theyre for me lol
I'm 30 weeks pg and just not fast enough to be able to chase my running son. He nearly ran out the front door of a store the other day in to a car park.
So, since then, monkey goes with us everywhere. He talks to monkey in the back of the car and I know he can't make great distances on me. I never "pull" him around on it, but let him walk freely. I just know that I have that extra ability to look after his welfare.
I have a VERY active DS- very determined and no fear. Would run where HE wanted to go regardless of where we were. I went to buy one of those back packs and was virtually harassed for putting my child on a 'lead'... People just don't understand that for me it was a nicer way of keeping him safe. He won't even go in the pram or trolley, and definately won't walk along side you.
For us it was a matter of safety.
LJMum - sounds like you have my son with you!
I really don't care what people think of me. If you don't like it, look away. We'll move on and my son won't be hit by a car or get lost in crowds of people.
I never liked the look of the old harnesses, but the new ones with the animals look pretty cool.
I saw a dad with one on his toddler the other day and in the other hand, dad had the dog on a leash, problem was dad's hands were getting confused on which one needed reining in and which one needed a little direction, so the poor little boy was getting pulled around for a few seconds before dad realised what he was doing lol...I jumped in the car having a nice little chuckle with DH looking at me like i was a weirdo
Evie - couldn't agree with you more!!!! it was a backpack or him running on the road in front of a car...
I think they look hideous but I also think they serve a great purpose!!
I hate seeing them on children as they look like they are being walked like a dog.....however I have a very active neice who can't sit still in her pram and it is the next best thing for her and my sister!
So I guess I think they look awful but I know they can be very helpful and safe!!
Bought one from target for $28 (cheapest Ive seen i think). Think its great. DD doesn't want to stay in stroller anymore, and its so hard to hold her and pay for stuff at the shops.
She loves it also, she loves hugging her little doggy.
I think if the child is running off i would get one for sure.
I would rather see a child with one on then in the middle of the street.