Vaginal Exams / Internal Exams - How Do You Feel About Them?

I had two during labour with DD1, none during the pregnancy. The first one as by my midwife when we first arrived at the hospital to check my dilation and boy did it hurt! I didn't mind having one though as I was interested to see how far along I was (3cm, 2 hrs after SROM). The second internal was when I was fully dilated and I didn't feel it as I'd had an epidural.

With DD2, I had one at 38 weeks as my OB offered a S&S. I could have easily declined and he wasn't the least bit fussed or pushy but I was over yet another very painful pregnancy at that point so I cheerfully accepted :lol: It didn't feel much different to a pap smear and was over with so quickly. During her labour I had two internals. One by my midwife when we arrived at the hossi (approx 1hr after SROM) and the second when the OB arrived. The first was a bit uncomfy but bearable. I was 2-3cm and not contracting much, if at all. I ended up having a 37 minute labour and my OB announced when he arrived that it would be quick and wanted to check me out. I dilated from 6-10cm within 5 minutes. That internal was very painful but any wonder when DD was literally about to fly out! Hearing my OB say '6cm dilated, no make that 7. This baby is almost here!' (or something to that effect) was very uplifting!

I swear everyone had their hands up there during my labour and that was before it all turned pear shape. To be honest I couldn't have given a hoot. They were for a reason and it really was the least of my problems.

I had maybe three or four during my labour with DD, none with either of the boys. MWs with the boys didn't need to do an exam - they could tell I was progressing. And it was lovely.

So far in three labors/births ive had one ve and it was at my insistence in my first labor at 8cm. I think I was actually entering transition as I suddenly decided I wasn't in labor at all and needed reassuring I was and it was real. I dont remember it being painful or anything as it was on my terms and I was prepared I guess.
I have "no ve's unless requested by me" in my birth plan in big red letters.

With DD1 I felt that the vaginal exams played a major part in my eventual 'failure to progress'. I felt pressured to progress faster and disappointed every time they told me I was 'only x cms'. I ended up with ARM, epidural, augmentation, and eventual c/s.

With DD2 I wasn't having that again. I put in my birth plan that I didn't consent to any vaginal exams. I wanted a VBAC and did not want to be put on a time limit. I ended up having one exam, at my request, when I was fully dilated. That was because I didn't believe things were happening so fast and that I could push already because of what happened in my first birth. It was my choice and I felt in control and that made all the difference.

First pregnancy I had two S&Ss, then was induced, so one for the gel, then went into labour 10 hours later, had two more through the 9 or so hours of labour. Was quite ready to refuse them, it was my plan, but then I kind of wanted them, so went for it.

Second I had three S&Ss, all at my request. Then, in labour, was offered one and really didn't feel like it, but succumbed to the curiosity. It turned out to be perfect timing, as I was in that beautiful lull between transition and second stage. Three minutes earlier or later would have totally sucked and I probably would have refused.

With Liebling, I had them and it didn't bother me. The examinations were not for my benefit, nor Liebling's benefit, but they showed the midwives that I was either not in labour or progressing as per the ticksheet. I had not been vaginally violated by medical personnel at that point.

With Stormageddon, I will be having none. Because no medical person is going to touch me when I'm pregnant or in labour unless there is a genuine medical need. And there is no genuine medical need for vaginal exams, from what I can see - just for the other person's curiosity to be sated.

I also didn't find an option that suited my feelings, but I chose I'm comfortable with them and will accept or refuse them freely.
I don't find them painful at all, so that affects how I feel. I have a midwife who will ask if I want one, and leave it up to me. I like to know what's going on, so I will have one sometimes at a prenatal exam around 38 weeks +/-, (also to have a stretch and sweep, if I'm at that point) and in labour, I like to know that I'm making some progress, so I had one when the midwife arrived last time (6-7cm) and one to make sure I was OK to push, at my request. I was pushing involuntarily, but didn't quite feel safe to go with it yet. The midwife said "if your body wants to, then go for it" but after she checked me, she said I was at 9, so I should try to pant through another one or two contractions, and then I could push full strength. I had her check again before I pushed, just to be sure.
My midwives don't push internal exams, nor do they seem to want to do them just to satisfy their own curiosity, or to make sure I'm staying "on schedule". If they did, I'm sure I'd feel differently!

I had none with DD (transverse presentation for last four months of pregnancy leading to scheduled csection).

With DS I had built up a fear of having them. First one was at 40+5 at my OB appt and it really wasn't that bad. I also had a stretch and sweep, which I requested in hopes of kick starting labour and avoiding a csection 6 days later (I was trying for a VBAC).
Next one was at 41 weeks during hospital appt for CTG monitoring. Had another stretch and sweep. Again not too bad.
During labour later that night and the following day I had three. I was 3cm, 7cm and fully dilated. I'd had an epidural for the latter two and the first one was ok. Overall I found the VEs useful in letting me know I was progressing with my labour and keeping me hopeful of achieving my longed-for VBAC (which I did get). Perhaps if I had not progressed as well/fast then I would have found them disheartening, or if they were painful. But for me they were more of a positive than a negative.

I went with what I was told for the first 3 births, but I was much more educated (finally) & confident with #4, so I put my orders in on booking into the hospital. I think I ended up with 1, maybe 2 VE's. But I had a posterior baby & back pain that I thought was pushing pain. Turns out it was too early & there was a little swelling to my cervix. Hearing that got me back on track & I regained control. So I don't regret allowing that one.

I selected I am uncomfortable with them but have them as the dr/mw suggests.

Personally, they are excruciating for me. I literally scream each time. DD1, I had 1 VE & was 8cm, that was when I first arrived at the hospital. DD2, I would say more than 10 for sure. I honestly had no idea I *could* refuse them!

I selected I am uncomfortable with them but have them as the dr/mw suggests.

Personally, they are excruciating for me. I literally scream each time. DD1, I had 1 VE & was 8cm, that was when I first arrived at the hospital. DD2, I would say more than 10 for sure. I honestly had no idea I *could* refuse them!

I think I am desensitised to them after going through IVF. Having Drs/Specialists/Sonographers up my hoo-har on a regular basis meant after a while it was a bit routine.

During birth with DS I had two, DD none. They are rather uncomfortable though aren't they? :O

:

---

I think I am desensitised to them after going through IVF. Having Drs/Specialists/Sonographers up my hoo-har on a regular basis meant after a while it was a bit routine.

O

---

This too!

I think I was scared of them due to the unknown factor. Also how FAR up the hoo-har the Dr has to go - bit further than what I had experienced with IVF.