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I had my mother as my support person for my first two births (for various reasons I won't go into here) and my DP (of just over a year at the time) at my third.
My first two births were horrendous - I yelled at screamed at my mother every time she tried to encourage me or soothe me and I just wanted her to go away. My third birth was calm, quiet and quick ... during labour, DP and I watched TV, joked, laughed. It was a totally different experience. I know subsequent births tend to be quicker (but my labours have been prolonged each time), but my mum had told my DP what to expect from me (and of course none of it happened) and it was all over so quickly, I kinda felt like he had missed out on something. :rolleyes:
But having him there was a truly special occasion and I wouldn't have it any other way (thankfully neither would he - I couldn't stand to have my mum or his mum there!) :wall:
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I can see what he's saying, and having read about him and his work before, I see where he's coming from and the kinds of men he's referring to. I know these types of men who are definitely a hindrance because of their reactions and their own anxieties. Some of these men would want to be there anyway, even if they do add anxiety and adrenaline where only endorphins belong, and some men are there because they are expected to be and would rather not.
My DP was awesome because as I laboured entirely at home, he was in another room, listening out for when my surges peaked so that he could offer a timely back massage and a drink. Then he'd disappear again and leave me in my headspace and bodyspace. This was due, in large part, to good education in the prenatal period with the HypnoBirthing classes and the book. Not all men, in fact not many, have this advantage, and I can see them being a liability.
Michel Odent has done wonderful things for birthing women and is a wonderful campaigner for active birth, and also supports waterbirths. His interest is primarily that of the birthing mother and the child, there is no other agenda. You know that when you are dealing with Odent.
