lol flowerchild i think i need u at my birth!!!!! i do not want a c/s but am scared if they say its needed i will fold without asking lol i am weak!!!
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lol flowerchild i think i need u at my birth!!!!! i do not want a c/s but am scared if they say its needed i will fold without asking lol i am weak!!!
It is also true to say that in this country there is a huge yawning gulf between the ideal of a natural well-supported birth and the reality of many women's birthing experiences!
Having chosen a C/S this time round due to PTSD from last horrible VB - I'd like to point out that not all midwives are lovely and caring and knowledgeable and supportive and there are some of us who have been horribly let down by a medical system that should know to do better.
At least this time when I'm on the table being sliced open there will be a anaesthetist standing right there whose sole job it is to ensure I come out alive. I'm motivated partly by an awareness that in chosing a CS, the medical system is forced to pay me and my wellbeing a higher level of attention than they did last time when it was all down to a couple of staff chatting in the corner paying me not the slightest bit of concern.
I'm sure also if I'd had the option of birthing at Gaskin's Farm none of that trauma would have ensued...however access to birthing centres run by fabulous midwives is limited in this country.
I'm reasonably sure I will be required to argue my case for a CS a number of times as I am a public patient (because i don't believe health care should be a profit driven enterprise). I wonder whether any study has been done on how many of the increased number of CSs arise in women who had been let down once or more by the 'healthy natural way' which was mismanaged and who chose to not subject themselves to that shoddy level of treatment again.
PS I agree with everything everyone has said about birthing choices needing to be informed and empowered. I for one still believe in natural birth, however I can no longer trust that all my preparation and decisions and intent won't be kicked aside by something as arbitrary as the quality of staff who are rostered on to support (or not) my birthing process.
Noni,
To help facilitate the birthing experience that you want you need to really really educate yourself. Choose a health care provider whose practices and philosophies gel with your own. Engage the support of a doula or midwife who you develop a trusting relationship with. One who can advocate for you, who can support and nurture you through the pregnancy, birthing and early parenting journey. These are some ways to get the type of birth that you want (and deserve!). I wish you that and more. We only do this birthing gig a select number of times, it is so much nicer if we have a beautiful memory to look back on.
Marydean, sadly you are a speck in the ocean of the women who have been let down, mismanaged and left to pick up the pieces after birth in our country. I am so sorry that you have had this experience. I can hear very clearly how much this experience has altered you and led you to the choices that you have made for your next birth. I can appreciate why you are feeling as you are.
It is absolutely correct to say that not all midwives are the devoted, loving and expert beings that we would like them to be. For some it is a job and when the shift is over they are off. I know that too. This is the same for any job, however in any of the caring professions it is just that more in your face.
I find it horrendous that you feel there is no other option for you but a c/section to feel safe in your next birth. Quite clearly the system has let you down very badly for you to feel this way. Post birth trauma is very real. No woman should be left in this position and I am so very sorry that you have been.
Our system is money driven. I know that you feel that health care should be profit driven but sadly it very much is. I have worked in both the private and public systems and the public system is no less driven by the dollar than the private. The difference is that because people pay in the private system their voices are sometimes heard just a little bit louder. Also because generally the populus insured by private health is generally more educated and has more money and this makes people listen. Unfortunately folk with an education and higher financial status are more likely to be heard. It is another sad fact of our society.
Your experiences and how you feel you need to remedy them are precisely where much of my passion has been fuelled.
It is an absolute FACT that women who have continuity of care through pregnancy and labour with a midwife known to them have better outcomes than ANY OTHER form of antenatal/postnatal care. This form of care should be made available to all women. ALL WOMEN!!!! Now, should that woman after the months of support and care from her midwife (or team of no more than 4 midwives) still believe that she cannot entertain labour then she will continue to have that care with her midwife/s in ot and then later post natally. This will continue to support the birthing woman.
Much can be done to heal birth trauma. It is hard work but I have seen some wonderful outcomes. Hypnobirthing is often hugely helpful as just one option. So is the one on one you will receive from a midwifery model of care. Woman centred care is what we need. Midwives who are passionate about this type of care are generally very passionate about women and women's birthing rites and rights. Of course there is never a blanket rule but generally speaking.
You are right that the forms of care I talk of are just not available to all women. In fact they are only available to a small group of the population. This is WRONG.
There are some things women can do who do not have this type of care available. You can engage your own midwife at a cost. In some states this midwife will not be able to facilitate your birth but she will be there and be your advocate. An experienced Doula can also do this - having a Doula or a woman support who is experienced and knowledgeable about the birthing process is another way to statistically have a more satisfying outcome.
We need to lobby our governments and we need to lobby our hospitals. We need to say "I need something different"!
The system is slowly changing because it IS dollar driven. Midwifery models of care are more cost effective, so the government is saying "mmm maybe it's not such a bad idea". However, we still have to change the thinking of some of the "old boys" ob obstetrics and government who truly believe that the medical approach is the only way. It is these people who often make up the policies and 'guidelines' for women to birth by.
Now, sometimes the medical approach is the best way. But it shouldn't be that way because a woman was not safely supported and honoured in her birthing journey.
Ironically tomorrow I am at a meeting with Qld Health about this very issue. About making a midwifery model of care available to women in rural areas.
Birth is a journey that a woman should feel supported, safe and nurtured on. I hope that your choices this time will make you feel that way. Thanks for sharing some of your story. :hug:
OooOOOoh good luck Deb, please do let us know how you go!!! I have head there have been a few good things going on in QLD of late.
I will Kelly. It is sounding really great. I am looking forward to it. I am taking a few pregnant bellies with me to be the voice of the birthing Mama!
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