birth of Joshua Alexander - and post birth issue ...

[update]

just in case anyone is still checking up on me, two things:

1. I have an appointment with the butt surgeon tomorrow to check whether it's "all done"
2. I have made an official complaint with the hospital, and they're investigating at the moment, and I should be hearing back from them in the next week or two.

all prayers for both of these are appreciated :hug:

Joshua is, as always, amazing :)

How did you go Peanutter?

thanks, CW ... well, the Dr has given me the all clear, but there's still pain and numbness and a lot of emotional fallout :(

but no more appointments for the time being which is a plus.

and the hospital has been disgraceful in their (lack of) response, so I've referred my complaint on to the Health Services Commissioner.

thanks for the follow up :)

P - that's really good that there's no more appts for now! How are you feeling??

I can't believe they haven't responded. Good on you for taking it further. Is there another thread somewhere about your complaint?

Thanks, OP :hug:

I'm feeling a bit better in one way, because that hospital is now such a toxic place for me, I feel physically sick and afraid thinking about it or seeing it, let along being there, so I'm glad that I shouldn't need to go back there again. That is positive.

I'm feeling wary though, because I didn't get to see my normal surgeon for the last appointment. I had to see another one, and they wouldn't tell me why. I'm guessing it's because of my complaint, but I was just told that he'd left a couple of minutes before my appointment (and my appointment was the last one for the day, and had been booked weeks in advance, so it was very odd if he really had just left before seeing me) so I had to see this other guy. So that was a little unnerving, because I was used to the other one.

So yeah, I'm a bit wary because even though he said it was all finished, there are still sore parts, numb parts, parts which don't seem "finished" and still a bit of swelling. The other surgeon said that could take up to a year - so another 4 months or so. But if this guy is right and all the internal bits are healed, then that's a big step in the right direction.

In terms of emotional and relational stuff, I've got a really good counsellor, but I'm under no false illusions of being all fixed up in a short space of time. But she's good, and we're working on stuff on an ongoing basis.

I imagine that when I get pg again there will be a lot of fear to conquer, but we'll deal with that too, in time. And when Joshua gets old enough to understand what happened during his birth, there will no doubt be more to deal with again.

So in terms of how I'm feeling, there has been progress, but it's still a really long road in a lot of ways. And I'm still extremely angry and sad. And the hospital's lack of response has made it worse.

I don't have a specific thread about my complaint. But yeah. How ironic that I ended up effectively having to make a complaint about the complaints department?

God bless irony.

Oh. My. Lord. Honey.

I am completely, physically, exhausted after reading your story. I don't know how you did it. I know you had no choice.... but geez.

Praying that everything is OK soon.

Thanks for the update. Glad to hear that it all appears to be healing properly and no more surgery.

Good on you for making your complaint, someone needs to be accountable I hope they treat you with the respect you deserve through all of this. I'd nearly be looking at compensation from them for all your out of pocket expenses and trauma that you have been through.

wow, i have just read this entire thread - yes, it's very draining just to read it all, i think i was holding my breath - all that stuff about the fistula - i have only heard of fistulas, in the context of circumcised African girls/women - and an Australian female surgeon who set up a free hospital in Africa to help the huge numbers of women affected. I had no idea it could also happen as a result of childbirth. I am still not sure if it happened to you as a result of childbirth, or having an episotomy (they scare me so much, i coudln't read the para in your story at that point).

and then to read about the mistreatment you received (the catherisation not being bandaged?) which meant the chemicals kept hurting your skin - OMG.

i had things go wrong with my pregnancy and labour too, things that i still feel upset about. Good on you for complaining, i did not feel strong enough to do that myself, when it happened to me.

my home water birth (marathon) turned into a emergency c-section too. so i sympathise (with having to let that dream go).

your humour and irony in the telling of your story - amazes me. you are definately a cup half full kinda woman.

i hope you are healed now, what an ordeal to go thru.

Wow Peanutter you've been through the wringer! I will agree with everyone else's prayers that you continue to heal well both physically and emotionally.

thanks, ladies.

it means a lot that people care :hug:

I had never heard of fistulas before. it was terrifying, because I had no idea what was happening ... I have since (quite recently) heard about that women (Dr. Catherine Hamlin) and the hospital. There's actually a couple of books and a website about it. I've got the book now, but haven't been able to bring myself to read it ...

on the website, they refer to fistulas as being "The most devastating of all childbirth injuries" and say that "Eradicated in the “developed” world at the end of the 19th century when caesarean section became widely available, obstetric fistula continues to plague women throughout the developing world."

I feel like letting them know that they haven't quite been erradicated in Melbourne... 'cause I got one at a very well known hospital in melbourne, which delivers thousands and thousands of babies ...

But I think they are awesome to dedeicate themselves to healing women who have experienced this injury from childbirt

i'm sorry you got to be the rarity - that is truely suckful.

Sadly fistulas are still quite common place in third world countries where women receive little health care - resulting in very large babies (ges diab) at times, young women (very young) having large babies, and women being left to labour for days and days. Most of the time the fistulas are bladder related and they constantly leak urine - as in it running down their legs at times. This makes them outcasts in their society.
Fortunately there are some wonderful people helping these women and getting them the surgery they need and also the pre birth care they need.

P, maybe you should get in touch with Catherine Hamlin (sp). If it possible...? Just a thought xx