Oh gosh what a truly amazing Birthing experience.
You did such a wonderful job birthing your daughter and WOW, you are so strong!!
Oh gosh what a truly amazing Birthing experience.
You did such a wonderful job birthing your daughter and WOW, you are so strong!!
I did chuckle at declaring a boy first, but then the rest of your story carried me away from that. I had no idea you had that much trouble after birth and as for the post-natal ward, I was just hoping it was my experience and not wide spread. Thankfully I had DH who rallied the birth cente MW's and met with the head of post-natal who herself apologised and said the sooner they got us home the safer we'd be! Thank you for sharing though - I'm still processing the part of my experience.
Your DH did well Ce. We were forced to spend an extra night against my wishes (I would have had to voluntarily sign myself out). I didn't have the BC support because my 'real' MW was away that weekend, and the rest of the BC staff were busy and short staffed. Hence no one looked after DD and I. In fact we didn't see anyone from the BC until day 3 & I think the PN people thought the BC were looking after us, and I wasn't told about what happened or my injuries by a doctor until the 2nd day on PN.
BTW you can fill out a feed back form online at the hospital website and apparently they have to follow it up. Looks like we should catch up soon to debrief and play with each other's bubs. So funny your DS arrived before DD ;)
I guess we don't talk about it for a few different reasons - thinking that those listening might not want to hear so much detail, or that they are still processing it themselves. I know some people IRL who are quite up for talking about all the 'gory' details and others who view birth simply as a process you go through to get a baby and would rather not go into details. Also too I think that some dismiss what happens to them because they think that it is part and parcel of giving birth so there is no point saying anything for fear of being seen as complaining kwim? Like the whole 'at least bubs is healthy' thing. And how many birth stories do you read on here that mention they poo'ed on the bed? I think I have only read one in all my years being on here. I know I didn't include it in mine ;) because I didn't think it was necessary to add, even though I know I'm not the only woman who's done it LOL.
Trill I guess I'm one of these people that processes things by talking them through. Good point that not everyone would find this the way to deal with issues, something for me to be mindful of. Being a LTer I've had some guilty feelings that I shouldn't be talking about these things and be grateful for the end result but I figure even after my journey to get here, my experience is still one that was real and something I need to acknowledge and process.
Thanks for your perspective, and on the poo side I think I might of but no one told me LOL. Cause when I asked for the mirror at crowning my MW delayed by cleaning something up down there. I didn't think to ask but assumed at the time that's what it was. It didn't bother me one bit cause I'd kind of expected from talking with my doula and mum that it would happen. Hence the talking about it before prepared me for it at the time.
Dusty, thank you so much for sharing. You went through such a rollercoaster to conceive her, only to then get on another rollercoaster to bring her into this Earth. And you should be very proud of your achievements.
You are very right about people not telling the whole story. My sister said this recently when she had her DS. She asked me why I never told her exactly what birth and post birth is like. I told her that people don't want to hear the negatives. If they did, they'd probably be too scared to have kids lol.
Well done to you and your dh on bringing such a beautiful little girl into this world.
ETA:
You know, I have never even asked if I pooed in labour. It never even occured to me, lol.:
how many birth stories do you read on here that mention they poo'ed on the bed? I think I have only read one in all my years being on here. I know I didn't include it in mine ;) because I didn't think it was necessary to add, even though I know I'm not the only woman who's done it LOL.
LOL Dusty, that may have been the time. It's a tricky one and I don't know what the solution is to addressing it so that those of us who want to talk are about to without worry of having someone think we're total loons for talking about it so much. I'm all for talking these things over because you just never know who might benefit from having the conversation with you kwim? But this reminds me of the episode of The Librarians when Christine is having her baby and she says to Francis "Why doesn't anyone tell you about this?" when she's mid contraction and Francis says "No one tells you anything Christine, that's why it keeps happening" :rofl:
I think there are lots of reasons we don't share so much.
Sometimes maybe we just don't want to face it ourselves.
I don't like mentioning the forceps (IRL at least) because that becomes the focus (possibly that's just my perception). But honestly that wasn't the worst part by a long shot.
Anyway, I hope you're being better cared for now Dusty :hug: And don't feel guilty - with things like birth, the end result and the process are almost entirely separate things.
What a fantastic birth story! I'm sorry you had such a traumatic experience post birth, I hope you're recovering well now :hug:
wow what a read. Sounds like a lovely birth. I am so happy that you can separate the two events!
I know your recovery has been long but i hope you are feeling some what better now, 8 weeks on??
Welcome to the world little Freya! You will never know how many of us awaited your birth for your beautiful mummy!
Aww thanks Tegam. Am feeling MUCH better now thanks. I've finally thrown all the uterine infections and had some further stitches removed so everything seems to be healing and I can even drive and carry the baby capsule now so watch out world here we come :dance:. Freya has to be fitted with a hip brace soon so we are delaying baby wearing for a few more months otherwise nothing will stop us.:
Dusty, you brought Freya into the world so fantastically well! :cheer:
Sounds like it's all a bit of a mystery as to why it got so hairy, but I'm so glad you now have your little girl home with you. I hope you heal well and the care you now get is much, much better. :hug:
Wow babe you are amazing and congrats on the birth of your beautiful girl!! So lovely to read that your MW supported you all the way through - I had a beautiful MW from the BC in Canberra too, who helped me achieve an amazing birth.... but I am so sorry to read that your care on the ward was terrible after everything you went through, hope that you and family are all doing well and you are enjoying being a wonderful muma xxx
What a well written Birth Story.
Congratulations on the birth of your special little girl and what a beautiful name.
I too am sorry to hear that you had such a rough time afterwards and hope that the recovery goes well.
What a beautiful birth story Dusty :hug: thankyou so much for sharing how Miss Freya arrived earthside.
I am so sorry you have had such a long and difficult recovery and hope that you are now on the better side of it, and everything is upwards and onwards from here :leap:
Take care and thankyou once again :comfort: xxoo
What an amazing birth story Dusty. Thank you so much for sharing it with us. I am so thrilled that you and your DH have precious Freya in your lives x
Thank you so much for sharing - I was a blubbering mess by the end of it just reading how dear Freya came into the world xoxo
Wow, thank you so much for sharing your story.
What a fantastic birth, but scary after events.
congratulations on the birth of your beautiful little girl!
Thanks for an amazing...wonderfully told birth story. Freya is just gorgeous and I am glad you are recovering well..I think it is important to hear birth stories that are more involved.. you don't hear much about them.. I think part of the reason is that a lot of people don't want to talk about the things that can go wrong. I can think of threads on here that raise the topic about why people always want to tell you about the horrible birth experience they had??? It is difficult and unless someone begins a conversation about that type of thing I tend to not talk about my own birth experinces and often wonder how in depth I can go with that person, which is pretty sad because I think its one of those things that can take a long while to debrief and talking about it is something that helps me a lot. Having said that I realize that everyone is different and have their own way of dealing with things. Its funny but I have always thought I would post my own birth stories, but when it came to the time felt they were'nt worthy enough or perhaps a bit to gory and it would'nt serve me well to leave those bits out as I would'nt have been able to acheive the release I was looking for, so instead decided to keep them to myslef, which always has made me feel a bit sad.
Anyway enough of my rant.. I am glad you have told your story Dusty.
lol about the poo, I can remember being horrified that I pooed in the shower, just rabbit poo but then did'nt know what to do about it, so in my labour induced haze decided to push it down the drain with my toe..never thinking about the poop on my toe or perhaps even under my toenail??? (redface)
My goodness sweets - you really went through the wringer. The wet paper bag analogy had me wincing. You know, you've done so amazingly well to remain so positive and to be able to process this so rationally so soon after Freya's birth - it took me quite a while to be able to recognise how traumatised I was by Euan's birth and the recovery, and longer again to process it. And my experience or recovery was not a patch on yours.
It's so true though that we should be able to acknowledge the trauma we experienced whilst still celebrating the joy we feel at the birth of our child. And that an empowered birth can still be a traumatic one. And that part of it can be perfect whilst another part of it intensely unpleasant. And that difficulty in conceiving or carrying our babies does not negate the validity of the difficulty we experience during their births - admitting how distressing the birth was does not make a child any less loved, or wanted. And that the various and often conflicting emotions we feel about our births are not neatly compartmentalised, but all intermingled. And that for some people the only way to heal from the experience is to talk about it (or write about it). Even, and especially, the gory, mucky and gross bits.
You did such a wonderful and inspiring thing in bringing your beautiful Freya into this world, from start to finish. And we all know that you'll continue to inspire as she grows. :hug:
What an amazing birth story, and how scary that would have been for you and your family afterwards too. I am so glad you can now enjoy your beautiful daughter xx
wowee, dusty - what incredible highs and lows ... I'm so happy that your actual birth was so wonderful and well managed .... and your LO looks just perfect.
I pray that your recovery is swift and complete, and that your relationship with your DH and little Freya is in no way impacted by the postbirth issues.
from one woman to another, feel free to PM me if you ever need to chat or vent or cry ... feel free to check out my birth story and post birth issue - different problem, but similar trauma, and a long road to recovery, physically and emotionally ...
:hug:
Great Birth Story!
Glad you bub got here safely! Well Done!:clap: