The very long birth story of Archie George

Thanks ladies. It has been good for me to share the story, partly to hear from others about their similar experiences, and partly because DH and I haven't been able to share the full story with many people. I'm finding that people IRL often ask "how was the birth?" but don't really want to hear the answer, and/or say things that are quite insensitive and invalidating.

I also wanted to report that Archie is doing fantastically well considering that first 24 hours. We are very lucky that breastfeeding was established pretty quickly, although with support from my Doula. And my attachment to him was perhaps "stalled" but not impacted too badly. And I've been able to reconnect with my psychologist who helped me with ANDA, and having some sessions with her to debrief and work through my anxiety and grief.

Thank you all again for taking the time to read and for your support.

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... I'm finding that people IRL often ask "how was the birth?" but don't really want to hear the answer, and/or say things that are quite insensitive and invalidating.

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I know exactly what you mean!!! I found the same thing. Glad you found it useful to get it all out on here.

:hug: Thank you for sharing your story :hug: I hope you are recovering well and bonding with your little man!

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I'm finding that people IRL often ask "how was the birth?" but don't really want to hear the answer, and/or say things that are quite insensitive and invalidating.

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I can totally relate to this too!

Glad to hear that things are going well with Archie. Hope things are good with you too :hug:

So glad it's all falling into place for you! There is so much to get used to with a new baby - be easy on yourself sweetie :hug:

Awesome :D

An epic story, like a good book you just can't put down. No wonder you feel traumatised - a lot of emotions there, and certainly some physical difficulties. You did a great job :hug: And thanks so much for sharing.

Thank you for sharing.You should be very proud!

Thanks for sharing Seph! I read this the day you posted but I wasn't able to reply at the time cause it just seemed so raw and close to the bone IYKWIM. I really thank you for your honesty about each step, your thoughts and reactions has actually helped me with my preparations for birth and I used your experience to talk some things through with my midwife that I hadn't faced until now.

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DH, my Doula and I have debriefed and processed everything from that day, and I am 100% reconciled to the events that took place, although we’re all traumatised regardless. DH and I always said that if we were going to accept medical interventions, it needed to be for medical reasons. I am lucky that I was able to deliver him vaginally and not have a c-section, although the third-degree tearing has left me feeling a little fragile, both emotionally and physically.

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I think you are amazing to understand what is going on and be reconciled but acknowledge you are traumatised is so going to help in the long run.

Well done mummy for doing such a great job in bringing Archie into this world - a much wanted and loved baby he is :hug:
xx

I hope I haven't freaked you out Dusty! :p

There are parts that were traumatic, but I hope overall it's a positive natural birth story, because I do still trust the process and that my body is powerful and strong enough to birth. And I'm convinced more than ever that medical interventions have their place as well, when used for the right reasons.

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I hope I haven't freaked you out Dusty! :p

There are parts that were traumatic, but I hope overall it's a positive natural birth story, because I do still trust the process and that my body is powerful and strong enough to birth. And I'm convinced more than ever that medical interventions have their place as well, when used for the right reasons.

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Nope you haven't :p but it made me confront some things I hadn't properly thought about which is a healthy thing. Like you we are with a birth centre which is attached to the hospital, so we talked about the reasons for transferral and what may happen etc etc.

Glad you are feeling strong about it all hun. Happy 4 weeks old today!
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Thanks you for sharing your amazing story Persephone. I could identify with a lot of it labour and post-birth wise, (although in my situation it did end up an emergency c-section). I think that you did the absolute best by Archie given the circumstances and the things that occurred that were out of your control. I really admire the strength you so obviously have and this sounds a bit silly but I congratulate you on educating yourself, having the right kind of support and following your plans as much as you could. I am glad that you have debriefed your experience both IRL and in here and have found it useful/helpful. You have fantastic insight. And of course, it's fantastic that Archie is doing so well and that you have established b'feeding so well.

With the questions from those IRL, I think people feel obliged to ask and have some level of curiosity but don't really want all the details, or don't want to hear about the emotions. Keep talking to us, your DH, doula, psych etc.

Be kind to yourself hun. You are awesome. xx