12

thread: Just read the most awful way to wean a child!

  1. #19
    Registered User

    Dec 2008
    8,986

    Some of my parenting choices could stir a great debate, as could yours. What works some people is always looked down upon by someone else


  2. #20

    Jul 2009
    Out North, Vic
    8,538

    I think it is definitely an each to their own kind of thing, while i don't think i could have done it i can see why someone would try it.

    DD2 could be VERY vocal about her want for booby (just ask HotI) and had we had major issues weaning then it not tasting so good might have been my only way out.
    I don't think it's cruel, it's another way of weaning.
    Just like telling your child there is no milk (when there is), that it tastes bad, that your boobs are sore - all are things that stop the child from getting what they want, all will cause them to be upset at the refusal.

    Each to their own, as long as someone is not using actual poison then i don't see the issue.

  3. #21
    2013 BellyBelly RAK Recipient.

    Apr 2009
    3,750

    Boot polish is what the pharmacist recommended to a friend at 2.5yrs. The look alone was enough without having a taste for her Dd. I'm BF my 17month old and it's not much fun when your ready to wean and they aren't.

  4. #22
    Registered User

    Jan 2010
    311

    Actually, I think it's not such an awful idea for a toddler. I am facing the prospect (again) of weaning DS2 (16 months) in the next few months because I would really, really like to try to have another baby and time is running out. I think it would be much kinder to him for him to decide he doesn't want the breast any more rather than me denying it to him for no reason he can understand.

  5. #23
    Registered User

    Sep 2008
    Gold Coast
    1,153

    I think that any woman who has BF her child for 2 1/2 years probably has her childs best interests at heart

    How she chooses to wean a child of that age is her business really.

  6. #24
    Registered User

    Jan 2009
    5,235

    The function of the stuff is to taste bad, but not poison you.

    Is doing this worse than putting band-aids over your nipples and saying they are hurt? or that your breasts are sleeping so you can't feed overnight? Or cutting holes in dummy s so they don't suck as well? Or 'losing' dummies or bottles or sending them to the bottle fairy?

    These are deceiving the child too, but seem to be more accepted. Parent decided weaning can really suck, and maybe this Mum found it much easier (for her and/or her child) to have an artificial means of saying no than it coming from her, ya know? I'm not advocating her method, just don't think she needs to be crucified for it.
    Gosh I must live under a rock, because I've not heard any of those ideas. I remember that nail biting stuff - I used to just suck it off and chew away!

  7. #25
    Registered User

    Jan 2008
    Brisbane
    5,039

    I think that any woman who has BF her child for 2 1/2 years probably has her childs best interests at heart

    How she chooses to wean a child of that age is her business really.
    Thank you. It's so nice to hear people being positive and respectful about other peoples choices!

    Would I do it? I don't think so but boy dd3 is 20months old and showing NO sign of ever letting up....

    These threads upset me. It's really comes off as ' oh look how bad she is, I'm much better than that!'

    Mothers need support! Not judgement!

  8. #26
    Registered User

    Jun 2012
    457

    I just think it's sad to turn something that the toddler enjoys and gets much comfort from into something yukky and leave them with that memory
    To me it just doesn't sit right so I wouldn't do it myself

  9. #27
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber

    Jan 2006
    11,633

    i could think of worse ways of weaning

  10. #28
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber
    Add sushee on Facebook

    Sep 2004
    Melb - where my coolness isn't seen as wierdness
    4,361

    I'm pretty sure my 18 year old doesn't remember that I weaned him by making my nipples taste bitter to him when he was 18 months old. To be honest, he just accepted that he didn't like it anymore and got on with it. And forgot about my breasts like they were an old toy in about 3 days.

  11. #29

    Jul 2009
    Out North, Vic
    8,538

    I just think it's sad to turn something that the toddler enjoys and gets much comfort from into something yukky and leave them with that memory
    To me it just doesn't sit right so I wouldn't do it myself
    What about a parents emotional state? the toddler may enjoy it but the parent may no longer enjoy that side of their relationship.
    i don't know many people who have memories of being say 2 or that are emotionally scared because their mum weaned them.

    I felt more horrible weaning DD1 at 5mths onto a bottle than i did telling DD2 NO for booby - it's personal choice and it comes down to what may or may not NEED to be done.

  12. #30
    Registered User

    Jun 2012
    457

    Each parent is different I just said for me I wouldn't do it.
    I understand a parent being finished before the toddler, I myself am over my 32 month old with his bad latch and my sore pregnancy nipples and trying to eat enough to sustain him and a twin pregnancy.
    For my situation I'm weaning him gently by cutting down feed times and cutting down on the amount of feeds
    Every parent needs to make the choice that is right for them. For me I wouldn't be comfortable using the approach of making it taste bad. Simple as that. No judgement. No statements claiming it's wrong. Just my personal stance.

  13. #31
    Registered User

    Jan 2008
    Brisbane
    5,039

    . Simple as that. No judgement. No statements claiming it's wrong. Just my personal stance.
    The thread title says 'the most awful way to wean'

    That's judgement. And maybe not recognising that is what I'm getting at.

  14. #32
    Registered User

    Jun 2012
    457

    Sorry I was replying to the people inferring I was being judgmental.
    I meant my post wasn't meant as a judgement. I clearly cant speak for anyone else including the OP

  15. #33
    Registered User

    Jul 2010
    Rural NSW near ACT
    413

    This is a little off topic but interesting I think.
    I breed horses and from what I understand there are two schools of thought when weaning foals.
    The "old" method is to take the foal (hopefully with a friend) to a place (either stable or paddock) that is out of sight and sound of the mare and just separate them both. I have seen this done and there is much whinnying and lots fence walking and general stressed behaviour.
    The other system (incidently the one I use) is to put the mare in a yard (that she has previously used) with plenty of good feed and water and leave the foal in the paddock that is around the yard with it's "friend". If the mre wants to feed the foal she can stand at the fence of the yard and let the foal feed and if the foal wants to feed it usually has to leave it's "friend" and convince the mum to come to it at the yard side.
    This second system is initially started for just a few hours a day and gradually the mare is kept in the yard for longer periods. Once the foal loses interest in it's mum (which takes from a few days to a week or so, sometimes I pop foal in yard and mum in paddock so she gets a bit more exercise) then the mare is put in a paddock nearby where the foal can see her but not drink during the day and mare is back in yard at night............generally it's a very gentle weaning process and it also means once done properly the mare can go back into the foals paddock and the foal won't try and drink again.
    My point is that it is less traumatic if both members of the feeding system have some choice. The system I use requires co-operation from both parties for feeding. It gives the mare choice not to feed and the foal choice too...................mostly in the beginning the mare calls to the foal to come back. She quickly realises the freedom of having no foal is pretty good then starts to reject the foal who generally only wants food when their "friend" is getting a bit boring!
    I am sure people who have breast fed successfully and weaned gently can understand the mares side of things :-)

  16. #34
    Registered User

    Oct 2009
    Bonbeach, Melbourne
    7,177

    IMO the cruelest way to wean a child is the way DD had to...still wanting it and needing it, but it just gets less, and less, and less, until one day it just isn't there She tried and tried after it went to get something...when the colostrum came in and she hated the taste, she immediately stopped torturing herself with trying to draw blood from a stone and getting extremely upset, and just shook her head and gave my boos a cuddle. Much easier!

  17. #35
    Registered User
    Add Butterfly Dawn on Facebook

    Aug 2008
    Climbing Mt foldmore
    2,894

    Just popping in to give you a hug PZ
    its heart renching when it doesn't go as you had hoped.
    I have had 3 weaning all different and not as I had planned.

    ------------------------
    unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. its not.
    Dr Seuss

12