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Mel- Thanks! So it won't be this awkward forever, she will eventually be able to do it herself! Thank God for that. There will be no breastfeeding in front of anyone else atm, lol.
AJP- Thankyou, IKWYM. I was putting her around to the side too far. I was reading something on the ABA website and it said my nipple should be in line with her nose so I'm remembering that. Yep, am putting breastmilk on them and letting them air, hopefully no unexpected visitors, haha.
Yep, Jazz can do it all herself now, since about 2ish/3ish months, just turned her head and latches on. You're both still got your 'L's in this, so its ok to not have it 100% fluent and efficient!:
Now Ash just gets on and off himself and it doesn't hurt at all
You're doing a great job hun. The others are right, it does get easier. I really wish someone had told me at first that it's only the first few weeks when attachment is so hard. Before long they open their mouths and attach perfectly without any help. And that pain will stop too. It's so much harder when their mouths are tiny and you are both learning.
The lipstick shape means there is an attachment problem, so that could be why you've had so much pain. It's great that you have worked out how to prevent that. If that's the only problem you will be pain free in no time.
Hang in there hun, it will be better really soon. You have done really well to have bfing going so well already.
yep the lining up with nose was what i was forgetting too!!! sorted all of our issues!!!!
remember that and chin on boob and your set!!
SJ, you've been given some great tips. Yes, it's important to line her nose up with your nipple. Also as AJP said to tuck her chin into your breast. And to be chest to chest ie. make sure she is facing your body, not tilted back looking at you etc if that makes sense. You see older babies being cradled and leaning back looking up at mum, but it's not good for newborns learning to attach well.
ABA counsellors can do alot over the phone, that's what they're trained to do ;) They'll certainly be able to help you with attachment, and describing how to feed lying down comfortably. You can definitely call without being a member, though being a member is great ;) :D
Glad you had a breakthrough feed before, it will definitely get easier over time!
SJ, it sounds like you're having a bit better time now. That's great.
I'm another one who took a few weeks to feel comfortable, even with no consistent attachment issues. I had a couple of grazes too, probably from 1 or 2 bad attachment feeds. I found after a few weeks things really settled down. But yes, those first few weeks were really tough. I found even the spray from the shower on my nipples made them sore. But after a little while you will look down one day and realise you are not in any kind of pain and you are both extremely good at it :) It will happen for you, mate. Hang in there.
Thankyou for all the tips guys!!!! It really helps.
Can anyone tell me how often and for how long she should be feeding atm?? It feels like she is feeding constantly and it's all I do!! Sometimes I can't believe she can fit that much in, it's unbelievable!!!! And how do I know when to change breasts? How do I know when one is empty. I think she would just keep going back on the same side if I kept giving it to her...
In the early stages Ash would feed anywhere from 10 minutes to 45 minutes on one side, then burp and top up on the other side. The top up side was usually 5-15 minutes and he would fall asleep feeding. I would burp him again and put him down or in the sling or whatever. The next feed I gave the same boob that he has topped up on so this one got emptied properly and the top up was the other one. That way they are rotating :)
Now he is on and off in 10 minutes tops ;) Once she gets more efficient at feeding you will find you wont feel like you are feeding constantly... until they go through a growth spurt and that is a whole OTHER fun time lol
Oh and also remember she is trying to built up your supply to her needs. It really is early days. Take it easy, offer the breast when she wants it, and rest while she's feeding.
Hey Sara :hug:
You are doing a GREAT job - this breastfeeding stuff sure is challenging and something that takes time and patience (as I've found out!). You will get there, just keep persisting and if it doesn't feel right, then it probably isn't right. That's what I've learnt.
If it hurts, try to change her position, even if you have to take her off and attach again. All the girls have given great advice.
Keep that LC close by to you like I have done with mine. It's the BEST thing I could have done was hire an LC... money well spent! I was just about ready to give up BFing 2 weeks ago but with the help of the LC I have come along way with Ava.
As you know (from my BF thread) I've had so many problems with BFing, attachment issues, low supply due to Ava not sucking effectively, painful cracked sore nipples to the point I couldn't breastfeed anymore from it :( and took 5 days to heal it and only just today am I using it again :D
I have to hold my boobs too as they are so big, it does make it difficult but it will get easier.... soon you'll be a pro ;) It's only now, for me, after 4 weeks that I'm only JUST getting the hang of it!!! And yes, I too felt like I wasn't able to enjoy BFing too because it was so painful every time she attached, I would cry and get so tense and stressed it was awful....
eta - with nipple shields it's best to only use them under the advice of an LC as they "can" effect your milk supply I believe. I don't use mine. Yet others use them and don't have problems.
As for how long they feed, try to follow your baby's lead. Watch her face as she feeds. If she looks like she's ready for a burp and starts to kinda pull off a little bit perhaps bring her off gently and give her a burp then offer the other side if she was on for long enough on the first side. Again, check with your LC she will tell you what's best for you and your situation... I agree it sure does feel like all we ever do is sit on the couch or lie on the bed and feed!!!
Lying down position can be good for sore nipples i found.
SJ, you'll be wanting to feed her at least 8 times in 24 hours, and probably more. She may take a while to feed at this stage, but as Barb pointed out in another thread, they are also just enjoying being with you as well as feeding. So little Grace may take longer to feed even though she doesn't need to as such. If you feel she is finished drinking and is just having a suck (like if she's taking over an hour to feed) then you can take her off if it's bothering you. But its really normal I think for them to take ages at this stage. They do get heaps more efficient as you go along, and also heaps more wakeful. In a few months time you will be getting frustrated because she's so easily distracted from the breast!
IRT knowing when your breast is 'empty', personally I never knew. I just fed Natty from one breast until I thought she'd had enough. Like Mel said, if you think she needs a top-up you can offer the other breast. Thing is, your breasts are never truly 'empty' - you will keep making more as she's sucking.
Oh the whole "empty" thing got me in the beginning too. I kept obsessing about "emptying" the breast, but I always seemed to have milk. My little one would only ever feed from one breast and only ever for 10mins (she still does). In the first two weeks (actually first month) I was feeding anywhere from every hour to every 2.5 hours. I never figured it out...I just accepted she would want to suck all day and run with it. Even now DD pulls off and my breasts still have milk...
Don't forget they get a lot more than just milk from feeding, they get your undivided attention, warmth, security and lovely feeling of being with mummy!
Feeding is a relationship between you and bub, and every single one is different. I would say offer the breast whenever you want to and she seems keen. Breastfeeding isn't really established until about 3 weeks, so just look on it as special bonding time and practice.
A bit of a ramble, but I DO remember being where you are now...take care of yourself!
Heaven she should be feeding 8-12 times in a 24hr period and some babies are better at feeding so it will depend on her whether how long she is feeding for. Maybe try and do some lying down Bfeeding when no one else is in the bed, can be a bit hard trying to push the other person off the bed in the middle of the night LOL!
Will get easier, i also found the lanolin creams weren't helpful if you are using disposible breast pads....the stuff wound stick to the pad and it was like glue trying to pull a breast pad off, i found the express breast milk just alone much better!
The DVD is called ?The first Week? and another one is called ?Getting it right?. Let me know if you want me to post it to you.
Hunny! First of all CONGRATS!!!
You have done so well already!!
Now, about those boobs...
When they say it shouldn't hurt, its not right...DON'T LISTEN!
Sure, in some cases, it starts great, goes great & ends great, but not for us normal gals ;)
Pain is the first sign of poor attatchment, but not in every case.
Have faith...it DOES get better. It may hurt at every feed, but I promise it'll get easier.
I was there.
DD1 - I quit feeding at 6 weeks coz I was dreading every feed.
DD2 - only made it to 4 weeks, then got thrush, which made things even worse.
BUT, I had no support...You DO!
Try using Lansinoh, put it on after every feed, no need to wash it off.
You can put a warm washer on your nipple just before a feed. It helped me alot.
Get your boobs/nipples out in the sun. It'll help toughen them up.
After a feed, let your nipple dry in the fresh air. Air them out heaps. Express a bit of BM, & rub it around your nipple & let it dry.
Remember to change pads after every feed to keep them as dry against your skin as possible.
RELAX!
You could also get some bepanthen. You put it on about 10 minutes before a feed, leave it 5 minutes, then wash it off then feed. It has an anaesthetic in it & can help reduce the pain. Just remember to wash it off, coz it can make baby's mouth numb, not a nice feeling ;)
You can get some nipple sheilds too. I had thrush & cracks & just used them for a day or 2 while I healed. Never any longer, but they gave me a break while I got better.
My nipples are small. (Well I think they are compared to average.)
I only think that coz when I bought the sheilds I got the average size & they were huge on me.
So I think thats why it wasn't pain free for me.
Feeding for me is still slightly uncomfortable/annoying, but the pain is gone.
It took 6 weeks for me to work it out. Even then there were good & bad days, but the worst of it was over at 6 weeks.
You are doing so great & should be so proud of yourself!
I am!!
Sounds like you are getting it all worked out!
oh guess what I discovered the other day ... bonjella numbs the nipples lol Ash was carrying on cos of his teeth and would feed so I put it on him and stuck him straight on the breast and they went numb. Maybe you could try that? Don't kill me if it hurts though!
Skye is right. It's not ALWAYS poor attachment. Ashtons attachment was fine, it was just my nipples were sensitive and not used to being sucked on all day every day... who's are?! They do toughen up!
Look, it may well be that some mothers have pain when their attachment is correct, I'm sure that's so. And there can be other reasons for nipple pain when BFing. But SJ already said that she had a feed today when the pain went away, so that shows that things are improving for her, that the pain she was having earlier wasn't normal .
I think it's counter-productive to suggest that it's okay to have pain, that it's normal, when in fact for most breastfeeding mothers it indicates a problem with attachment. Yep, it might be okay for some, but for the majority it's not. And they could be reading this thread thinking that it's okay, they don't need help, they just need to persist through the pain. And then they end up with badly damaged nipples :(
Sorry to be a downer (and to hijack SJ) but I thought that needed pointing out.
You are right Janie...it generally is a poor attachment issue. I think it happens to us "perfect attachment" girls when the baby goes ON correctly, but kinda pulls back when the flow gets too much (as was the case with me). This is how I kept getting the "lipstick" shape. The solution is to take bub off and re-attach.
In the end my nipples toughened up on their own so I don't need to re-attach her myself, she just sucks the nipple back in her mouth again.
Ah..time heals all ills it seems, but in the meantime, you are right. You have to take care of those nipples and re-attach, re-attach, re-attach....so it stays correctly in her mouth.
I think you know yourself if bub is attached correctly, there is a difference between poor attachment pain and just nipple sensitivity. As you said Heaven you had a feed with much less pain, so you are on the correct road there. Also someone else said about the football hold, that could be good just to try her attaching onto a different part of the breast.