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Coming is as Jo's DH I can honestly say it was a non issue for us. Yes it was something that was done when I was a baby and now its not so much. I personally would not want to hurt my son in this way. We both think hes born perfectly the way he is and will stay that way UNTIL he chooses to do with his body what he will.
Darren
Thanks for taking the time to share another bloke's opinion, Darren.
And if I can quickly say it here, stoked to hear your good news, Jason. :)
We had no problems getting a recomendation through the public system. We just asked a midwife but we ended up going to the Dr who did our friend's son instead.
Oh that's excellent news. Guess all i can do is ask and if they turn us down ask for a paed referral. He'll have to be tested for Sleep Apnoea anyway i think so a referral for a paed shouldn't be too difficult.
Am posting very cautiously here....
I just wonder how the experience is for the baby? Obviously I understand that we're never going to have a verbalised account of that, but I think it's a very important factor that seems to be overlooked sometimes. Further to that, how much can we really say that the experience is "forgotten" as long as the baby isn't old enough "to understand"?
It is not my intention to offend anyone, nor am I saying there is a right or wrong answer, just something to think about.
I completely understand where you're coming from sarah. I was very worried with getting ds done, but my dh really wanted it. As I said in an earlier post, ds was gone from my sight for a total of 3 minutes (and yes, I did time it!) and when he came back he looked just the same. There were no tear tracks or red blotches on his face which there would have been if he had cried, and he was just in the next room so we would have heard it anyway. If he had looked at all distressed there is no way I would be getting our next bub done.
The snip process which would be used if the baby was older, then yes, it would hurt and I wouldn't even consider it, but I truly believe ds didn't feel any pain from the plastibell procedure we had done.
We have 2 boys. The oldest is 4yo, our younger one is 21 months. We are going through this issue too. My DH is circumcised but he had no desire to have our boys done. I had a preference for leaving well alone, as nature intended, "everything for a reason" etc.
Our dilemna now is that it seems that our 4yo may have phimosis (where the foreskin is too tight) and may have to be circumcised. At the moment we are using steroid cream as prescribed by our paed to 'loosen' it. I am worrying about the pain and trauma. However I guess there are many medical operations (like the appendix removal I had as a child) where pain is unfortunately needed to be dealt with for the sake of health. My 4yo has discomfort when he gets an erection when needing to do a wee. He has said that he wants it to be "fixed".... he is already at that point... so therefore i really think that the psychological scarring will be minimal as he is old enough to understand why it has to happen. We have carefully told him that to "fix" it the little bit of skin at the end of his penis will need to be removed. He is ok with that. If he has it done no doubt he will suffer a little... but I really think he will get over it... just like I did with my appendix wound. At least he will know that the pain is for a reason that he understands.
Our other son won't need surgery for phimosis so he could be the "odd one out" in our family but we don't care and we'll explain that he won't need to care either because there will be thousands of males with both cut and uncut foreskins in his life.... just as there are thousands of people with appendix scars. I know that for some it might have deeper issues with this but whether you are cut or uncut doesn't really mean that much in the greater scheme of things. Yes some people do it for religious reasons but in our family it will be done for medical reasons alone so there isn't a need to examine the issue much deeper I guess.
I worry about the pain and possible complications but for us the alternative is ongoing pain. it's quite straightforward.
Welcome to BB Dane :) I hope you stick around too! These have just been my personal thoughts... I hope I didn't offend.
I personally am opposed to the amputation of ANY body part unless it is medically necessary at the time (rather than potentially necessary in the future). I feel quite strongly about this but i don't want to offend, it is a personal decision to make.
Here is a great video about the foreskin - what it is for and all about it. Perhaps knowing more about this marvelous organ will be useful to you.
Bx
Dp and i decided not to circumsize our boys even though he is done, we didn't feel it was necessary in our circumstances.
Bec, i just watched that video, very interesting!
Hi possiblly a bit late, but.......
We had our son 4 years ago and I was certain I did'nt want him done, Dh on the other hand was'nt sure. He is, but for me there was no reason to go ahead with an op for no reason. My son so far has not noticed a difference between him and dad, but eventually I'm sure he will, no biggie pardon the pun!!!!!!
As far a myslef I have had relationships with guys both circumsised and not I don't have a prefernce, but there are girls who do????? I wonder if that will be a factor later on as more boys will be left untouched. You may change you mind when your little one enters the world, it is amazing how much you want to protect them from unessecary pain, I have cried a multitude of tears over immunisations, so certainly would have been distressed by circumcision.
Good luck with the decision you make!!!
From the POV of some women/girls preferring uncut/cut etc, if the stats are right and there are less boys being done, then the girls of this generation will only really know uncut penis' and it wont be an issue kwim? So I don't think our boys who aren't done will miss out on the action ;) because of it LOL.
Dane, sorry to barge in and it may be a little late. I have a little girl so didn't have to personally make the decision however, my girlfriend and her husband had it done with their little boy and it was no drama at all for him. They tied something to the skin and it fell off in a week, he wasn't even phased by it or in any pain. That's just what she described it as anyway. HTH.
Dane i hope ur little bubba has arrived safe & sound.If bubby did end up being a boy....have u made a decision yet?
We had Bodhi done when he was 3 weeks old. It took about 30mins. He wasnt crying or unsettled afterwards. The bell thingy fell off after about a week i think. It did look abit odd for like a week & a half. There was minimal bleeding,just a tiny bit of spotting every now & then. His little doodle looks fine now.
The only thing weird about it all was.....after a month or so of having it done, it started to suck right in so it just looked like a little hole where his doodle should be lol. I asked friends with baby boys both cut & uncut & was told that this is what happens to boys when they get snipped. DF was very worried when he saw it for the first time & was like "ahhhh look how small he is!" lol.
Anyway, u will do what is right 4 u & ur family. Everybody is free to make their own decisions on matters like these. :)
Good luck with it all
You make an interesting point. Research indicates that babies, even at birth, experience pain during circumcision; sometimes the shock of the procedure means that they don't cry, but their vital signs indicate that they are responding to pain.:
Obviously, it is each parents' decision, but I can fill you in on the reasons why most doctors no longer recommend or perform circumcision. The main concerns are the risk of infection - it is a very difficult area to keep clean while the penis heals, as it is obviously in the nappy; the inability to adequately deal with pain in very new babies, as your options for pain relief are limited; and the risk of damage to the penis which affects sexual function later in life.
I could post some references about this, but for a fairly balanced view of the pros and cons of circumcision, check out the wikipedia page on circumcision: Circumcision - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia . It provides a lot of supporting evidence for both sides of the argument.
My own personal viewpoint is that circumcision without a medical need for it, is simply a cosmetic procedure. It is a procedure done to alter the appearance of the penis. And I don't believe that it is right for me to consent for a cosmetic procedure for a child that is not old enough to say themselves how they want to look, especially when there are known risks involved. I'm circumcised, and i have heard the argument regarding wanting your children to look the same as their father, but really, why? Circumcision is a lot rarer these days, and boys are going to see both circumcised and uncircumcised penises from a very young age - it will be quite normal to see both. It was pretty normal to see both when I was in preschool, and I remember seeing my first uncircumcised penis.
Anyway, my opinion, YMMV.
I already posted a more factual response on this subject elsewhere - and this question was months ago anyway. But just to add...
While some uncircumcised guys say they wish they were - no circumcised guy I've ever heard has said he wishes he was not.
Funny you should say that Greg. I saw a doco on SBS a few weeks ago about it and the majority of men were against it and one was even suing the hospital that did it on his son without their consent (in the US) and another one was going even further than that and was regenerating his own foreskin by pulling the skin on the shaft of his penis forward towards the glans and taping it down for a few weeks until it stretched. he would then repeat this and pulled it little by little over his glans until he had what looked, for all intents and purposes, like a real foreskin - he even showed it on camera and it looked just like it was meant to look. Not something you would probaby try yourself though LOL - I reckon it would have hurt a but. But he said he felt so much MORE like a man for having it back again - he said he didn't give permission for anyone to take it and as he couldn't get it back he decided to do what he did. he also said it affected his sexual function to NOT have a foreskin and he felt sexier after he was finshed the process.
LOL. What people will do to get money or onto TV! :p
I've heard the sexual function comment a couple of times now. But no-one I know has any problems in that regard. (How would they even know!?) Perhaps he was just a hopeless... er... you know.:
he also said it affected his sexual function to NOT have a foreskin and he felt sexier after he was finshed the process.
Sexier!? How odd. Girls I've known over the years (but not necessarily KNOWN) all said they thought not being done was ugly.
That's funny, most girls I've talked to about it prefer uncut. Also a good male friend of mine who's seen more willies than I care to imagine says now he doesn't bother with cut.: