Once again, I have never had weight problems. Never felt the need to lose or gain. I could have had this conversation with my friends who do not have children but it wouldn't be the same as my body had undergone changes whereas they haven't yet.
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Once again, I have never had weight problems. Never felt the need to lose or gain. I could have had this conversation with my friends who do not have children but it wouldn't be the same as my body had undergone changes whereas they haven't yet.
No motivates, no hidden agenda. Just curious to know about women who have child and were pregnant like me. Lol@you can see how much heavier we are than you. Obviously, everyone else would compare once each member disclosed their weight.:
I'm sorry but I am still confused with the purpose of your thread.
You say that you are not overweight, do not have issues with your body... what is the purpose of knowing 'our' weight?
Is your question meant to be... 'are we happy with our body post baby or not?'
If so, my answer is yes, I am happy.
TBH I couldn't tell you how much anyone weighed even though I've read the thread. I'm interested in people's ideas and coments but their weight is frankly pretty much irrelevant to me.
One of the wonders of forums is that we're forced to assess people on their ideas/attitudes/personailty not their appearance.
A person could be a super model but if they came across as having an ugly personality I wouldn't really have the time of day for them.
I'm still failing to see why it is so important to you? Giving birth and the changes your body goes through during pregnancy are going to be different for everyone and weight is not a key indication of how you have changed physically. I think it's a bit smug for someone who has never struggled with weight to ask others what they weigh though. Good etiquette says that you should never ask a lady her age or weight ;)
G22, I can accept you weren't trying to be difficult, but as others have said, there is some confusion as to your original post and others since with you sending mixed messages about what you're hoping to get out of this thread. You made the comment
and then later said:
Once again, I have never had weight problems. Never felt the need to lose or gain. I could have had this conversation with my friends who do not have children but it wouldn't be the same as my body had undergone changes whereas they haven't yet.
So, are you trying to understand pre or post baby image issues? And I am really struggling to understand why you have started this thread considering you state you have no body issues (which the last quote alone doesn't suggest) or the inkling to gain or lose weight.
Please help us to understand what you are trying to achieve/learn so we can do that without feeling judged.
Bron - PMSL - love what you wrote about ice-cream! I'll never look at a tub of ice cream the same way again!
MG :)
Girl22, what did you mean when you said 'I'm a little obsessed by weigh at the moment" then?
Eta, I am calm, I am just really confused over this.
I think obsessed was the wrong choice of word, seriously. "Interested" is what I should have said. "At the moment" referring to the whole pregnancy and baby stage.:
Mother Goose,
Main reason for starting the thread: Curosity really as many are struggling. Since it has become a very emotional and sensitive topic I think it should come to an end and apparantly I've offended a few people. And also, receiving a warning from the administration team, so I better keep quiet to not stir up more 'trouble' :rolleyes:. I still don't understand what the big fuss is about. Are we not mature adults?
Trillian,
What's the shame in asking about weight and age? Besides from answering to a stranger on the street, there should be no shame. In 20 + years time I probably would disclose my age and weight if asked. I see no problem with that. Not that I ask random people on the street because I am not interested about them. Lol. This is a forum after all, I thought anything and everything is up for some discussion.
Did you read my post at all? I'm starting to think you glossed over it. Rolling your eyes (emoticon or not) and then harping on about maturity is kind of hypocritical don't you think?
As for administration, if you have a problem with them perhaps contacting them directly would be the best action.
yeah but there are things that even on line people dont feel comfortable discussing, without rhyme or reason for what ever circumstance they choose, pg or not. It shouldnt be seen as childish and immature if people choose not to...good on you for being open but please dont judge others who dont share the same view as you.:
BB is about understanding and valuing others opinions without critisim, bias or pulling the '****'.
Respect what each other has to say without demoralising yourselves!
Funny you should say that because I was thinking that it's not just being unfit and out of shape that troubles me. If I was fit and in shape I would still be bothered by being a different size than I was because I've got used to that size and to thinking of myself as that size.:
Its got nothing to do with shame, but it's really none of your business what anyone weighs and perhaps you should have phrased your question differently, Because I do think it's rude to ask someone what they weigh, and then say what you've since said.
I would never ask some one what their weight was....and i sure as damn would never tell anyone mine even if they tried to get it out of me. Its just not something i publically announce.
Im not skinny...im not just a bit over weight....im the size of an elephant...no i dont like it and yes i wish i was like alot of women out there...but im not...im me...and i have to except me for me.
Girl22, I think you should have phrased your op saying you were just curious and then the whole thing might have made a little more sense.Apart from the comments that followed which just didn't make any sense to me.
I really don't think making snide remarks about Admin is the most mature thing to do, after all they are just doing there job and trying to defuse the situation.
I have found your comments to me to be rather condescending.All I have wanted to know was the reason for you wanting to know.All you had to do was say you were just curious to begin with.I feel, seeing as I posted to your original question that I at least deserved that without being spoken to in that way.
I'm going to bow out of this now as I don't think it's doing me or anyone else any good by continuing.
I'm going to answer the question because it was something I was thinking about the other day in terms of whether other people, like me, have a 'magic weight'.
For me the magic weight is 70kg. If I weigh over that, my clothes don't fit properly, my thighs rub together, I "feel" overweight and exercising seems a struggle.
As soon as I go below the 70kg, I feel so much better. My clothes fit, I don't have a muffin top and walking seems so much easier.
So for me even though there's not that much difference between 69.5kg and 70.2kg, it really seems to make a world of difference for me.
I'm about 166cm so even at 70kg, I'm still classed as a tad overweight on the BMI, but once I'm at that weight I feel like I can lose more weight whereas until I get to that weight I feel like it's a hard slog.
Hope that makes sense.
FWIW, I was 74.5kg when I got pregnant with DD and am now closer to 69kg. Next goal is 68kg.
I have just read through the posts and have a feeling that this thread is similar to the petite person constantly saying they are fat so that others deny it.
I think we are all forewarned now that the motives may not be altruistic so either don't post your details or edit them if you have already disclosed more than you want. I think anyone demanding more explanation will be disappointed.
I just wanted to say that I understood the first post perfectly.
The title is "how much do you weigh?" It is pretty clear that G22 was after a number. I cannot see why the reason she wants it is important. Either you are happy to post the number or not. And many of the first posters didnt actually post a number.
Obviously the posts since and the inability to explain motivation and becoming obviously flippant was unhelpful in the extreme. I think this whole thing has been a bit of a miscommunication.
I personally dont think there is anything wrong with the question...it is certainly not the way I was raised, but then again this is an online forum for a reason. People should feel free to ask questions that in person may not be entirely appropriate. Nobody was forced to answer and if they arent comfortable, then they shouldn't.
Girl22 - I hope that you can learn to express yourself better and be more open to answering questions yourself before next espousing home truths about maturity.
And for your information, I weigh 91kg.
I put on NO weight at all during pregnancy and have put on 25kg since.
Fiona, I'm really interested in your idea about "magic weight" - partly because - without particularly trying to or not to, my weight seems to stabilise at certain points...eg, I weighed my pre-preg weight for nearly 9 years (after not losing my "baby" weight after first DD). I'm sure it would go up or down by a kilo or so (around Easter, for example :p) but pretty much stayed around the same.
I'm just wondering - do you think the magic weight stays the same all the time - or do you think it's something that drifts a little as time passes. eg a lot of women find they gain a couple of kilos as they head into middle age? Or is it really set in concrete for you? :)
FWIW, I disclosed a number because a) I'm in a getting-real-with-myself mood today and b) because I wanted to demonstrate how arbitrary the judgements that we make - collectively or individually - about weight - our own or others - really is.
To answer your question I am 65kg (well I was last time I "weighed" in, I was 70kg 3 weeks earlier and I was ok, with my size but not thirlled ;)
I was aiming for 60kg, but now I am not so fussed, I think for me 65kg is my Magic Number/Weight (I really think there is one Fionas!!), I am 165cm tall, but my focus is more on my measurements than my weight, as at my fittest before having bubs I was 64kg, but I was a lot trimmer and I could lift more than my own body weight, I was very toned, had good looking abs etc, so I don't know if I will ever get to 60kg, but as long as my measurements keep dropping it is all good in my book. I am also hoping to get my body fat % down, me and my PT spoke about BMI's the other night and they are really quite out of date and such a small percentage of people actually fit within these ranges naturally. So we look wholisically at the body, done density, body fat, fitness etc. And on top of the the "I feel good about myself" feeling, being happy with your self.
Fab Post Lime Slice :clap:
I tend to find that my magic number is about 55kgs. I am a short arse - 5'4 if I am being generous lol- so I tend to find that I don't look as slim as I would like if I am more than that. For me to feel slim I generally get to a size 8. I haven't been that small for a few years now, having been steadily putting on weight since moving to perth 4 years ago.
Except for when I was preggers! lol then I couldn't put on weight if I tried, even lost 3 kgs near the end...
More than made up for it now though! I have NEVER been this big, and it is scary. I dont want to end up on the Biggest Loser. this is morbid, but my mum was a big lady, just about always had been. But when she died, the effect of the cancer on her body was horrifying. she didnt lose weight. The meds she was on at the end made her bloat. But none the less, I dont want to look like my mums body did when she was dead. That is my motivation. I NEVER want anyone to see me like that, alive or dead. Extreme I know, but it is the only motivation I have that is strong enough to help me lose the weight and keep it off.
I'm 110kgs, ive put on 10 kgs since July ... oops..:rolleyes:
I was one of the earliest posters and gave my weight and what I want to get back to - as fionas said, my magic number.
I DO think GG2 could take a bit more time to work out what she is saying, but clear communication is a skill some people lack, I know I have days when I write poorly.
BUT, I also think that the original post and question in it was fair enough to put out there and its up to the readers whether they reply or not. She did say in that post
quote
I hope you ladies can feel comfortable in sharing your weight.
I think if you didnt then you could have moved on or like some others just not give your stats. I have read threads in BB that I was not comfortable with before so I clicked myself away.
Limeslice - you are about the same size as me (h & w) but I feel too thin if I get down to sz 8 or below 55kg. My ideal for how I look and feel and easiest to natuarally maintain in 57kg.
Currently I am wondering if I will ever be back down there though :rolleyes: ? I put on alot of weight this last pregnancy and its not shifting as fast as it did last time.
Salsa - Nice to know!
57kgs sounds nice :) I think the thing that has really tipped me over the edge this time is that now I have GG cup boobs and am a size 16-18....except that I cant find clothes that small that fit around my boobs. It is just depressing.
My ticker says most of it, I'm 81kg at the moment aiming for 65kg. I stand at 165cm tall with a medium frame. After having three bubs and being 36yrs. I don't expect to ever look as good as I used to and am coming to terms with it and getting real. I would also like to say FWIW, that if I didn't want to tell the world then I wouldn't have posted it.
It is good to see the situation smooth over. Perhaps in the future to prevent bickering, it is best for a person to move away from threads that they do not feel comfortable with or answering. I have noticed individuals who had a problem with this thread were the same individuals that did not post a figure. While others posted a number. In real life, of course it wouldn't be the best of discussions to have. Having said that, this is virtual word afterall, so I thought it would be fine to post without having to "explain a motivate" or the importance of why I am asking such a question. I must have communicated poorly to have triggered so many unwanted responses. But than again, this is a discussion board not a massive assignment I have to submit, so therefore I might not too much about how I am presenting my point of view or opinions. Well, that is all from me this time. Take it away ladies. Enjoy the thread!:clap:
Girl22, I think the problem was that your comments were contradictory, not that you offended with your question just because you asked it.
I flipped through a great labour and birth book at the library (the name of which has completely escaped my mind) that had a much more realistic weight chart. For my height (last time I checked it was 5'4 but DP and I are quite sure I've grown taller) 75kgs is healthy and 80kgs is overweight depending on your body type, for me that's totally true. I have a large/heavy anyway - when I was between 70 and 75kgs I was a size 10.
I currently weigh (sigh) 100kgs and am a size 14 - 18 (usually a 16). My highest weight was 112kgs (my pregnancy weight and I got up there without being preg when DD was 9 months). I lost 17kgs and got down to 95, gained back maybe 10 and have since lost 5. I would be ecstatic to get down to 80 as with a bit of muscle, that's very healthy for my frame. I imagine I'd be a size 12 which would be great. I'm more interested in being fit and capable rather than being X weight and X size to be honest.
BTW, to the woman who said she has big boobs at my size, I'm a 14-16G! Lol!
They say the smaller you are the more you'll gain, the heavier you are the less you'll gain. True to me too when I was 60kg I gained heaps (35kg), when I was 80 I gained a little (11kg) and with Ash I gained 3kg lol:
You may as well be a stranger on a street. I don't know you. There is no shame in responding for those who are comfortable doing so. Your attitude turned me off replying.:
I have always struggled with gaining weight. During my pregnancies put on a max of 8kg and always carried very small. I always hoped to keep some weight on after giving birth but within a week I'd be back to my pre preg weight. Thankfully with my last preg I kept on 3kg. I am 52kg and 163cm, small frame, have no idea what my BMI is or should be. My point is we are all different body shapes, frames and sizes but the most important thing is to be happy with who you are, beauty shines from the inside out.
Regards,
Dianne
QUOTE: Girl22 "Having said that, this is virtual word afterall, so I thought it would be fine to post without having to "explain a motivate" or the importance of why I am asking such a question. I must have communicated poorly to have triggered so many unwanted responses. But than again, this is a discussion board not a massive assignment I have to submit, so therefore I might not too much about how I am presenting my point of view or opinions."
I think this is problematic and is the crux of the issue as to why people have rightly become upset :(
BellyBelly is not a computer game. It is not "virtual" like The Sims. BB is 100% about real people's thoughts and feelings Girl22. And to be honest I feel like you have been a bit dismissive of this. Have you met many members in real life? I have... over a dozen... and once you do this you could never call BB "virtual".
Yes, members could choose whether to contribute to this thread... but we contribute with the knowledge that BB is a SAFE place for sharing information about ourselves. You might not feel the need to be tactful Girl22... but maybbe read BB's guidelines... is is a requirement... if tact is too bothersome maybe stick to The Sims... a true virtual world. Also I'm wondering if there might be a language barrier... your posts could do with some editing for grammar Girl22... they are a bit challenging to read from that context as well.
BTW I don't own a set of scales so my weight was just an estimate based on how my clothes are fitting ATM. I check my weight when I either go to the doctors or at friend's houses... my weight fluctuates sooooo much that I think it would be unhealthy to weigh myself every day... i would start to obsess and that could be counter-productive.
I like the notion of a "magic weight" too Fiona... I think mine could be 70kg too. ie I wouldn't want to go over that because then i would feel uncomfortable.
The feeling this thread has left me with is yucky...
I went to sleep feeling yuk about it and woke up still feeling blah about it.
TBH Im not that interested in how much people weigh and all the rest, we are all different shapes and sizes and after having babies we tend to become different again.
I have not met any BB members irl and I dont go on any other forums, but I think BB has a strength that members become quite loyal and respectful of one another.
Its a great place to be able to come and talk about things you might not with anyone else, but your online discussions are still with real people going about their real life. Infact we become rather privalaged in what we learn about each other in BB that even though I know meeting someone irl life they might be different from how they come across on here, I dont take for granted what my online relationship has shared.
Marydean - to answer your question about whether my 'magic weight' has varied with age, I'd say it would have but I don't know what the figure would have been when I was in my 20s because I didn't own a set of scales.
Though I do remember weighing myself at a friend's house when I first arrived in Australia and I was 24 and 54kg. I'm sure if you'd told me then that I would one day be elated to be 'down to 70kg', I would have shrieked in horror LOL. So I'm guessing that back then my 'magic weight' would have been around the 60-65kg mark.
I guess weight is a sensitive topic and I'm not totally sure what the reason was for the OP but to me you're either comfortable answering the question or you're not.
I'm not sure how 'helpful' our answers are because everyone is different and it's really comparing apples with oranges. But if I only posted answers that were 100% helpful then I'd probably post a lot less so idle curiosity is enough of a reason to ask a question IMO. It's really like asking who had a VB or who had a CS - doesn't really tell you a lot because every labour is different. Not that I want to open that can of worms, mind you.
I have a magic weight as well, 60kgs. I am 167 cm tall and medium frame I guess.
When I left school I was 52 kgs, and quickly climbed to 60 (yikes). Just before my wedding I was 72 kgs (my absolute max!). When I fell pregnant I was 63 kgs, and now at 29 weeks I am 70 kgs.
I guess I have never really had a weight problem or thought negatively about it, but I do feel more uncomfortable when I am unhealthy / unfit.
Right now I am concerned about how I am going to loose this pregnancy weight post birth, because I don't have a regular exercise pattern anymore and I will have to find time to do it with a newborn. Ahh!!
Girl22, please read the following carefully:
Our question: Why would you like to know?
Your answer: I'd like to know because........
It's not an assignment, just a one-line answer.
I am still to lose my post pg weight and do get a tad sad when i see women lose it so quickly. of cos i was like G22 and was 22, I'm sure my body would have bounced back in no time and would not have body issues like her; and perhaps wonder why I have no post baby body issues, whilst other women do...
But I'm 35, and everything slows down, sometimes i feel like the cows on the ice-cream container!
But i have a gorgeous baby, and I love it when his tiny hands grab all the fat around my waist!!
I was quite interested in this question for my own reasons.
I always imagine the wonderful ladies on this forum to be super models, i don't know why i just do. so for me it is nice to know there are real woman out there after all, of all different shapes and sizes.
Im getter better with being happy with my weight i have been up and down for years.
-when i met DH i was 63kg and lookin' hot went to the gym 6 days a week.
-when we got married 4 years later i was 80kg & feeling happy with life in general.
-post DS1 i was 83kg but feeling ok about it still.
-6 months later i hit 89kg and felt like crap, i'm not overly tall, 165cm.
- now post twins im 76kg and feeling more like the hot mumma i wanna be. who needs a gym with 3 kiddlets.
my goal is 68kg it puts my BMI where its surposed to be. my hubby is awsome he loves curves so doesn't feel i need to lose weight.
I truly hope that one day all woman no matter if your 40kg or 400kg, can look at themselves nakes and say "man i'm hot" I am such an awsome person.
and maybe one day i'll do that too. one day..
[QUOTE=kristy J;1677218]I was quite interested in this question for my own reasons.
I always imagine the wonderful ladies on this forum to be super models, i don't know why i just do. so for me it is nice to know there are real woman out there after all, of all different shapes and sizes.
LOL me too I think its the avatars that make me think your all hot mamma's....
Well when people meet me they will always say that I am so lucky to have the body I have I am 53kg at 165 cm but its not how I feel I hate almost everything about my body and me in general, I hate DTD with the light on as I dont want BHL to see me, my body or my face, he fines this very hard to deal with as he thinks my body is great.... I have always felt this way about myself and dont expect it to change... I would love to love me but dont, I know plenty of " Overweight " ladies who love them selves and are so very comfortable within themself...
So I guess what I am saying is that I dont think it matters what you weight as long as your happy with yourself... I am trying to teach my girls to love themselves for who they are and hope they will be happy with how ever they turn out, as they will always be beautiful to me...
As for fittness I am so unfit most people would be so much fitter than me, I couldnt even make it though a gym class, if I ever went ( which I dont coz I couldnt keep up and would look really stupid, plus hate going anywhere new where I dont know anyone )
Ummmm I think I have reveled waaaaaay to much here.... for those of you wanting to lose weight I hope you achive your goals, and I hope everyone is happy with the way they are ....
i just wanted to add..
Girl22 (you're probably not reading this anyway)
i think it was just really poor that after offending the lovely ladies here, with or without intent, who took the trouble to read and post in your thread something personal to them; that you didnt have the decency to apologise to them.
just my 2 cents...
Prama's comments about bodies not bouncing back the same way as you get older certainly resonates with me. I was able to compare as I had my first baby when I was 24... my 2nd when I was 33... and my third when I was 36. And it's not just losing weight... it's lots of health related issues... but yes things certainly do slow down as you get older. It would be easy to be a younger mum and feel smug about losing weight so easily post baby.... but life has a funny way of teaching you to see other perspectives and that same mum might find (if she chooses to have another baby in her 30's) that things don't necessarily happen as easily.
Tali also makes a good point about not associating weight with happiness and self confidence... I certainly agree there! When I was ill last summer (which resulted in a dramatic loss of weight... possibly below 60 which for me and my heavier than average skeleton was too much) I didn't feel any more self confidence... still had my old hang-ups. Happiness is so much deeper that your layer of subcutaneous fat!
I am 170cm.. and weight 90kg.. i was 96.4 4 weeks ago.. I am doing WW and my goal is about 75