What was your 'why'?

Realising that I could spend today gaining weight, or I could spend it losing weight.

Keike - I have had to face a lot of issues with my family recently and as I have shed the stress and unhelpful people I have lost weight. No need to stress eat/binge and now I can stop and say I have had enough. Sounds corny but like I am no longer the person they have labelled me as and really the best person I can be, ITMS?? Also I have been moving a bit more to help myself.
I am also trying to focus on being healthy as a whole.
You can do it - you are worth it and you will feel so much better for it.

Coming back to this thread.....I just called 'bro' numerous times by a male sales assistant....I must be so chubby-tubby he thinks im a man!! Its really bothered me, emotionally (and its not like me to be so thin skinned!) :(
Im starting water aerobics next week with a friend.....and not eating a single thing but ice and fresh air until then!!

Bro?! The guys lucky I didn't headbutt him!!

I'm 25 next year and i don't want to be fat. I want to party in a little black dress!!

So after this baby i'll have 18ish months to get down to my goal weight.

First and foremost, I am embarrassed and ashamed. I look awful in photographs - I am the "fat mum" I never thought I would be.

Embarrassment and shame aside, I have weight-related health issues (my back is a wreck and I have weight-related sleep apnoea) that have been playing on my mind constantly and I am tired of feeling guilty about having done nothing about it when my daughter is turning 1 in a month!

So yeah, I just can't take feeling so rubbish about myself anymore.

I know that I will not have a baby unless I do this. I have lost 9 kgs so far, and while it has only scratched the surface, I want this more than ever.

I learned that I had never actually let myself feel hungry. The first time I felt hungry, I actually enjoyed it. I enjoyed knowing that I was finally letting my body tell me when I needed food, not my emotions or mind.

As I said, I have a long way to go, but for once, I am happy, I feel free and I am really excited that I can start to look forward to being the best possible kimmi I can be.

To get here, I have fought these demons for 1 years. Every Monday of my life, I said, I am going to be healthy. That is about 780 Mondays where I just didn't stick to my plan. I could plan my little heart out and still I couldn't stick to it. I realised that I just couldn't function if I couldn't simply stick to one thing I wanted. I craved to know what it felt like to feel good.

Don't get me wrong, I am only in the early days, and while my enthusiasm is strong now, I know there will be times when it will waive. I love my wine, my cheese and what I have grown to perceive as social eating. My best friend is pregnant, and while I once would have felt sad that it wasn't me, I have lost my wine buddy and I know if she can go without it to grow a baby, I surely can go without it to make a baby.

When I came close to making the choice to change, I conducted an experiment. It BLEW my mind. I did my hair, my make-up and I looked in the mirror. I thought I looked nice. I took a photo of that exact moment and was blown away when I saw the picture. It was nothing like what I saw in the mirror. I took about 5 photos before I realised that is how the world actually sees me. Not my distorted view in the mirror. I was really really shocked, sad and the phrase reality bites certainly came to mind.

Today has been a hard day for me, I REALLY feel like pizza for lunch. I'm confident I won't do it, I know having the pizza or not is just a choice. All I have to do is make the right choice.

I want to be like all those other women. The ones who I'm sure have all of their own sets of demons, but I want to be the woman who wears a pretty dress and actually looks good. I am SO tired of being "pretty for a big girl". The number of times I've heard from well meaning people that "Gee you look nice for a big girl", or "You really look after your appearance for a big girl", makes me sick.

I'm 99% confident that none of this makes sense, but the point is I hear you. I feel for you. Having SO much weight to lose myself, I know the true weight this burden can have.

I hope things get better for you. Put your mind to it. I'm trying so hard, and if you ever need anyone to vent to, or need to express your worries, my inbox is always open. I know that venting can help. I can't really vent to my DH because he simplifies right down to "if you want to do it, just do it!" and you and I both know, it's just not that straight forward.

Once again, best of luck x

A combination of receiving information on gastirc sleeving & Banding surgeries and my husband totally refusing to support me undergoing either procedure, moving house, and seeing a psych for depression where we mainly focussed on my weight.

I knew it was now or never and while I'm currently on a bit of a plateau with quite a way still to go, I have the knowledge that if I knuckle down I CAN actually do it.