Never. It's been 2 years since I last spoke to her.
Printable View
Never. It's been 2 years since I last spoke to her.
Everyday. We work together. On the weekends we call each other. I am blessed to have her. She is the best.
Most days, it varies sometimes we can go the week without a call then other weeks daily.
We are lucky we live close by & we drop in the kids love it and have a great relationship with their grandparents.
Me not always so close with my parents but like some of the others have said, having kids myself & getting older changed most of that for me, we all make mistakes and are products of how we were raised and the things that happened to us...I know I am no the perfect parent & I would be devestated if my kids walked did'nt see me or hardly ever talked. :shakehead:
I can only do my best & tell them "I LOVE YOU"
As little as possible
very rarely. maybe once every 3-6mths. I usually initiate contact. I moved to the other end of the state when I turned 18 and she's bitter about that. She's bitter about most things. When DS was born she flew down for 5 days..... first time she'd come to visit me in 8yrs. basically if I didn't fly up to see her, I didn't see her. I haven't seen her since DS was born 2yrs ago. She's coming to see this baby when its born. I am not looking forward to having her in my home again. The only thing that I'm slightly excited about is showing her how awesome my life is, my home, my babies and how I learned all this on my own. She was not a good parenting role model IMO. Knowing her though she won't want to acknowledge what a great life I've made for myself here.
I won't repeat her mistakes.
I'm told my MIL was an awesome lady but sadly she comitted suicide when DP was a teenager. We keep a portrait of her in our living room and I look to her to guide me, despite the fact we never met. I was however lucky to meet HER (adoptive) mother, DPs grandmother. She is beautiful and treats me as if I'm one of hers :). I love that lady and it's sad to see her deteriorate in her old age.
Every couple of days, usually via text or a FaceTime. We try and see each other in real life at least once a fortnight.
We emigrated here from England in Nov 2009 and I've only seen my parents in person once since then (last year) but I call mum every Sunday and Wednesday and we text a few times in between. I've always been close to my parents and even though we're now the other side of the world it doesn't seem that far as we talk so often.
My sister lives a few hours drive from our parents and I speak to them more than she does :(. There's nothing wrong with the relationship, she's just not family orientated.
my parents only live about a 5m drive away and I usually go round there with the kids a couple of times a week. then I might speak to her on the phone once as well
My mum died when I was 11. But I have a great relationship with my MIL and we speak/visit her every week.
Usually once a week. We have every Sunday nigh dinner at my parents house with all the siblings who happen to live in Canberra. ;)
I called her once last month. I used to call weekly but now it is getting hard to find the time. I doubt she notices anyway, she isn't a family person. We have lived 2 hours away from her for the last 5 years and she has been to visit 3-4 times, either after I have had a baby or to drop something off. She regularly drives right past our town but doesn't bother to take a 10 minute deviation to visit us.
She does care in her own way. I honestly don't think that she realises that it might be a bit hurtful that she will travel the country pursuing her hobby but never visits, not even in passing. She won't come up for the kid's birthday party or christmas. If we want to see her we have to travel to her which we do every few months but it is too expensive to do often.
I speak to my mum every few days. She lives 15 minutes from us and visits once or twice a fortnight usually. Or we pack up the dogs and go to her place on the weekend. All our dogs get along so it's like a little doggy play date :) I couldn't imagine not talking to or seeing my parents, we are pretty close.
Once a fortnight when she visits sometimes once a week
Every day, or every second day. She lives a few minutes away, so we go to each others houses a fair bit. I feel very blessed to have her live so close and be so involved.
I used to speak to my mum once a day, now it's about 3-4 times(maybe more) as she isn't well.
A couple of times a week, usually. Pretty long phone conversations, at least half an hour. She lives interstate. We've had our up and down times, but I think it's good now. She respects me and I understand her better with time. And forgiven her. She was not there for me for a long time when I needed her, emotionally and other support. I'm so glad I gave her another chance.
At the moment we are living with them while renovating...so pretty much constantly!
But otherwise everyday. And my dad too! I'd be lost without them.
My heart hurts for all of those who have posted regarding parents who just don't care or want to be involved in your lives. How sad is that? I would be lost without my parents and one day, when I have a child, I would hope they would grow up wanting to have regular communication with me too.
Ausgirl,
I agree. It is extremely sad. I couldn't imagine having my mother and not be in regular contact with her, the woman that carried me for 9 months and gave birth to me, etc. I have three children that I am raising, giving everything to, I would expect them to always remember me and treat me how I treated them.
Double post.
:
And I think this is the key: not everyone has a mother who has raised them well, with love, with sacrifice, nurturing and bringing them up in a healthy environment.
Each of us can only speak to our own experience. We are welcome to have (and voice) our opinions and thoughts, but we cannot judge each other for such things.
Those who have strong relationships with their mothers can empathise: consider your relationship, and the strength you draw from it. Something very grave / toxic / painful / traumatic must have occurred, whether at one time or over an extended period, to cause someone to elect not to continue that relationship. Think of what would have to happen for you to break ties with your mother: this is not a decision anyone would come to lightly.
Or, the distance might be the parent's decision. There's an estrangement in my family, and it's not from our side at all. We would have loved a relationship, but they cannot accept my father's decision to marry my mother. Not a difference of race, religion, values (not that those would be acceptable reasons either) - she's just not the woman they wanted him to marry. 40 years, 4 children and 4 grandbabies on, we still have no relationship with them, because they STILL won't accept that she's the one for him. This is unfathomable to me. But I'm not them, I don't know them, and I don't understand them. But I try not to judge. There must BE a reason, and it's not really relevant whether that reason is acceptable to me. I only have to deal with and respond to what's in front of me. I love my family. I can't imagine breaking those ties. But that's because I have been loved, encouraged, taken care of, and so that's how I respond.
No matter what the reason, these severances of relationship are painful - even if they bring peace and relief.
Compassion and understanding are needed.
Marry me 'Nutter.