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Either or for me, I call mine by their first names, or Mum & Dad.. like Yeddi, it's more the idea that we are family, and I am lucky in that I get on very well with them. I probably refer to them most as Mum & dad, if I use their names they go all 'whoa, what have YOU done?' lol.
I am shocking. I was brought up to always call someone older then you by Mr, Mrs or Miss lol.. I find it hard to call my MIL by her first name. Only been with he son for almost 16 years :lol:
Like tonight I rang and FIl answered and instead of asking for her by name I just asked for the lady of the house is a silly voice..
Um I don't call them anything...
I just start convos with "heyyyyyy..."
:hide:
Lol Nic, there are certain people I can't bring myself to call anything other than Mr or Mrs, even though they insist I call them by their first name - I think once you start it's very hard to break!
I actually think that sounds wonderful Yeddi - and I get the thing around family. Yes, they are family, but I dunno. To me it just seems that there's only one "Mum" & "Dad". It's too bad really that there's not another name for the inlaws - instead of calling them mum & dad or just their first names.
Thanks Raffy. I might just bring it up casually, and I guess if there is anything behind it that she wants to talk about then she can take it from there. It's really only strange because it's so recent and until then she was so opinionated about it not being done.
Mmm, I'd simply ask about it in your position. Almost casually but still gently if that makes sense?
I call my in-laws by their first names, we get along really well but Mum to me is my own mum - who does routinely get called "mother dear" as well, to her amusement.
MIL refers to me as her daughter when introducing me to anyone & I call her my second mum. We are pretty close & while she's not my mum, she means alot to me.
If the kids aren't around then I use their first names. Otherwise, if there are any of the kids in hearing they get Gran/Grandad
We call each others parents by their first names - or we call them Pop, Narnar and Nanna when the kids are around.
I do the same thing :hide::
Df calls my mum 'mum' and has been since we moved in together. But I could NEVER call his parents mum and dad, i usually refer to them as df's mum and dad rather than using there names
i call mine by their first names although now i might call them gran or grandpa if DS is around.
my dad grew up away from family & never really had a mother figure. he was apparently really uncomfortable calling my mum's mum anything until i came along & then he felt happy to call her gran.
I call them by their first names if I use names at all. I kinda agree with your mum Kaytee, I don't think its really appropriate - unless you've lost your own parents or something equivalent. But that's just my opinion.
MIL wants me to call them mum and dad but considering there are times I don't even call my own parents mum and dad, I think she needs to accept that its never going to happen.
My mother will occasionally call my Nan (dad's mum) Mum but very rarely, and its only been since she lost her own mother. Dad always called grandpa (mum's dad) dad, but he lost his father when he was a teenager so he hadn't had a dad himself for a very long time.
I call MIL her first name, or nanny. I'm more concerned about the names she calls herself, I think she is going to end up confusing DS :confused: she calls herself nannaguy, her name, even 'aunty#her name#'.... not sure what to do/say about that one :o
Kaytee, I reckon if you're comfortable bringing it up casually I don't see the harm. You're right, she may just be really missing her mum - especially if there's been an obvious change since then. Do you think she'd be upset if you asked? Have you spoken to your other nanna about it?
It's funny, this whole in-law business. I agree with PPs, I feel I only have one set of "real" parents and could never bring myself to call the in-laws mum and dad. They would never expect it though - they know how close I was to my mama. Though I do have some defacto "parents" in different parts of the country - mums and dads of friends etc.
PS 39 weeks, woo hoo honey! :dance:
first names. lol reminded me once DH and i were dishing up dinner for us and MIL and i said to him "give mum some more potato" ... she was standing behind us and said quite rudely "i'm NOT YOUR mother".! pft. Like WTF lady, i was talking to dh about you ie his mum. Anyhoo it really annoyed me.. . happened years ago but i was quite hurt by her reaction...
anyhoo... my parents called each others' parents mum and dad so i thought that was normal when i was a kid and often got confused about who was whose parents!! :)
Lol thanks Buffy :)
I brought it up with Mum this morning. She called about something on Facebook anyway, so perfect opportunity! I just said I noticed that in her last status she referred to Nana as "Mum". It seems she's really just missing her own mum. She feels like because it's been 2 1/2 years since she passed that she shouldn't be mourning her as much anymore and feels like people won't want her to keep "going on about it". I told her that's silly, and that she should mourn her mum whenever she feels the need, and not to stop talking about her.
She said she understands that it seems like she's replacing her own mum, and acknowledges how she used to feel about it, but her and Nana are spending a lot more time together, and they really have that kind of relationship now. All in all I think she is doing ok, just missing her mum and happy that she's able to have a similar relationship with her MIL.
I called FIL by his first name. And I try not to talk to MIL (they're seperated anyway). I use their first names when talking about them, unless I'm talking to DP. Then its "your dad/mum"..
I call DP's grandparents Nanna and Ampa. And his other parents by their first names, as they decided when DP and SIL were born they were 'too young' to be grandparents so they've always been called by their first names.
But, DP's folks aren't my parents so I don't really want to call them Mum and Dad.
My dad has always been very 'anti' calling your partners parents Mum and Dad, I guess my dislike (for want of another word) stems from that.
I call mine by their first names - were quite close but DP doesn't actually call them mum and dad on a regular basis (makes it hard telling our girls NOT to call us by our first names :rofl:)
When not being called by their names they are Nanna and Grandpa i do call DP's nan, NAN though it just fits easier but her reminds me often that she's not MY nan :rofl:
I call the inlaws by their first names..... but DH calls his mum and dad by their first names or old girl and old fella! lol they don't mind :)