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Hi girls, quietly popping in to register my interest in learning about all things HB. ;)
We are TTC at the end of this year and DP has said he is okay with me having a HB (which was a major obstacle). So while I'm not even pg yet, I'd love to learn from all of your experiences as you travel the road before me! Mine will be a HBAC. So I'll be watching Infinity with much interest!
hi jennifer and welcome :hello: woot woo on DH! :dance: such a good feeling when you can both be on the same track and approach this together. i reckon that has been the most amazing aspect so far with our HB journey...we are together in creating our space for this new arrival and no one comes in to interfere or block him out. such a special time to share with him and DD...
AFM: i need to book my 30 week appt with my back up midwife (and friend). however have to admit that i am slightly reluctant as i know that she is still reeling from the birth of our other friends son last week and i really dont want to set the wrong kind of mood ITMS. thinking i might hold off until 31 weeks....what do you guys think?
I'm not sure Cassius - I guess there's no harm in waiting an extra week anyway.
Hi Jen - hope you're here officially soon...
I was thinking the same thing about DH being more involved with a homebirth. But he's so distracted with his job and other current obsessions he seems largely uninterested in the pregnancy. Oh well, i guess it's still early days yet. I just konw with him I need to get in very early and keep at it to actually get anythign out of him. As long as he manages to sort the pool out on the day we should be right. :rolleyes:
Just wanted to come in and tell you how proud of my DH I am! He was on the phone to MIL tonight to tell her we are having a homebirth- well it did not go down well, and I was waiting for DH to be influenced by what she had to say especially considering he took awhile to come around to the idea. WELL he was excellent, he imediately started rambling off facts about homebirth (who would have thought he actually listened to things
i said) and saying how safe it is etc. I gave him the hugest hug afterwards! He told her that he doesn't care what she thinks cos we're doing it anyway. Then he said look i'll give you stuff to read about it, and then told her he had to go. Cos she can get on her high horse. So what do you girls recommend that I give MIL to read? My parents are fine with it same with FIL it's just MIL, but i know she can get under DH's skin so I don't want her changing his mind.
Em that's a great idea. I'd like some stuff to give DP too, to back himself up. I don't think he's prepared/aware that ppl will oppose our decision.
Also, does anyone know which health funds currently provide cover for midwives to attend a homebirth (if any)? Just thought I could do any necessary switching now, when I've got no issues with a waiting period. ;)
Jen, on priate health insurance have a look HERE
Thanks Marcellus! I did a hunt around and found the Australian Unity one, which is a little more exxy than our current helalth fund, but we might be able to drop it back a bit after the birth. Seems like it will at least cover most of the cost. That will make DP happy.
I'd check the health fund's current stance given all the who-hah over HB these days. Not that the fact that IMs can't set insurance should change anything because that's been the case for a while now.
YAY Em thats GREAT news. So nice when you have the FILL sipport of your partner!
hi girls!
Em: that is great that DH stood his ground and defended the decision that you guys had made together xx it will give MIL a much harder battle front to complain if she sees that you guys are united and unanimous in the decision!
as for the PHI...not sure! we got rid of ours a few years ago, so have no idea! there have been a few ppl on BB that have used it though for their HBs...hopefully there is some info out there!
Just popping in to say hello and let you know that very unexpectedly we welcomed our tiny baby girl into the world yesterday at 25 wks + 6 days. You can read the BA HERE
Obviously she wasn't born at home!
BBL another time to post more. Hope you're all going well.
Stoked and Sara - I am so terribly sorry about your losses. I wish you lots of strength and healing.
Jennifer - I switched to Aust Unity before this pregnancy. There is a 12 month waiting period for homebirth, so bub cannot come before our coverage date (bub's due a month later, so we should be OK there. If bub came before our coverage date we couldn't have a homebirth anyway). I then wrote a letter to them requesting the homebirth refund when I was about 20 weeks pregnant and had a positive response that week. They already had our IM on their approved list. So far they will offer cover to 30 June 2012, based on the changes that are coming through with IM's having a 2 year grace period. It did make a huge difference in our PHI cost, but we'll reduce it after the birth and the refund is paid.
Infinity - Wow! Congratulations on the birth of your daughter Heidi! Wishing her lots of strength as she grows in NICU - I hope her stay isn't too long and that both you and your DH don't find the time too stressful.
Em - good on your DH for standing up to your MIL.
I haven't posted on here in a while. All is going well. Now at 31 weeks and counting down the remaining weeks. Still having issues with SPD, now joined with constant back pain. I just figure it's all softening me up for a nice and easy birth at home :) Funnily enough, the thing that works the best is hydrotherapy with warm baths a second, so I see it as a sign this bub is a water baby.
We're on 2 week appts now. We've stopped discussing the ins and outs of birth now and have moved on to being emotionally ready and being able to trust the people in the room (I'm a control freak and just need to learn to let go). My IM wants me to focus on the love that created this bub in the lead up to the birth. Also, I'm practising letting go of my fear of a hospital transfer/caesar. I figure if I concentrate on it, it kind of invites it into my life. We have the experts we need, so we know if it has to happen, it has to happen. Meanwhile I want to pack a hospital bag in the next couple of weeks, just so I won't need it, if that makes sense.
In the next appt, we look at how to cope after baby arrives. Should be interesting.
I hope everyone else is well
hi girls!
Infinity: congrats on the arrival of Heidi! Like i mentioned in your BA i hope that the she continues to go from strength to strength and comes home soon xx Can't wait to see some pics! *mwah*
Tashybabe: HELLO!!!! it has been awhile! i was wondering how you were; especially with the SPD. pity to have missed you at the BB meetup at the EBC. although the music was so loud that we probably wouldnt of been able to chat much anyway lol!
we are also down to fortnightly appts :dance: so exciting! i also need to 'let go' and surrender to this birth process, come what may. but man it aint easy, especially when i have the PTSD thingy to contend with urgh...but Nicola is so awesome and calm and confident that i am always left feeling really awesome after visits.
AFM: have my next appt tomorrow! very excited as it is also with my backup midwife who is a good friend of mine. she is bringing her little girl around too as my DD and her DD are besties lol! so Leila is already 'preparing' for the occasion and organising games lol!
Wow Infinity!!! Your daughter arrived so early and I'm so glad to hear how well she is going. So excited for your amazing, fast VBAC too :D
Sounds like it's getting to the business end tashybabe and cassius! Very exciting!!
I had my 20 week ultrasound this morning and all went really well. I was pretty nervous as I havn't been able to feel baby moving much but it turns out I have an anterior placenta so that explains that :D I'll give it a couple of days for my results to get on my file at the birth centre then I'll be ringing up to pull out of the hospital!! Can't wait for it to be official.
Congrats again Infinity. I too hope she is going from strength to strength :hug:
Hi Tashybabe - I hope your mental preparation is going well. And that's good you're talking about 'after the baby' - it's so often overlooked in antenatal care.
Your midwife sounds wonderful Cassius, just what you need! Glad your DD is excited about the visit too :D
That's great about your scan meow. I've been wondering if maybe mine is anterior too - I could feel more at this stage last time. But I guess they're all different anyway.
Otherwise, we're just cruising along.
Pooibly then Marcellus- I was feeling exactly the same! I was feeling big kicks by this point last time.
Me again... just have some exciting homebirthy news to share. My aunty and cousins (9 & 13) just came over and I asked them if they could be my son's support people for labour and they will :D My aunty is a single mum so time off work is a big deal for her but she's going to save a sick day for the occasion. Having support people for my son has been a bit of a weight on my mind so I'm so glad they're going to do it. My aunty has never laboured (breech c-sect followed by elective c-sect) but I think she'll be really cruisy about the whole affair and I'll be happy to have them in my space (on the out skirts though ;) ).
We also got a copy of "Hello Baby" the other day and I read it to my son. He seemed interested in looking at the birthing pictures and then I made "the sound Mummy makes when the baby is coming out" so let out some loud moans and he wasn't pleased at all! Well, he can be pretty sensitive so he was good considering. He hid behind the side of the couch, peeking at me curiously.
He also seemed really intrigued by the ultrasound- watching them move it around my tummy and checking my face (which was smiling so he was okay). I think it made him 'get it' a little bit more that there is really is something going on with my tummy.
hi girls!
meow: ohhh so lovely that you got to see bubs! :dance: and how awesome to share that with DS! DD was at creche when we had ours...no doubt she would of started trying to rip apart the room though so probably was a blessing in disguise lol!
and awesome awesome news that your Aunty can help out with DS during the labour and birth. so nice to know that there is outlet for him if he gets a bit worried/bored/cranky etc. i am :pray: that my mum makes it down in time (she lives in QLD). otherwise we have had 2 sets of neighbours offer to watch her. but i would LOVE for her to be close enough that when baby was being born she could be there IYKWIM.
Marcellus: no doubt it is an anterior placenta...i was suprised as many of us in the belly buddies group have anterior placentas! i always thought that posterior was more common but am beginning to shift my thinking lol!
AFM: well Sue my midwife just left and we had a blast. as i mentioned she is a good friend and it was good to just catch up and talk about what happened with our mutual friend (who had the baby that needed help). i feel much better and calmer about things. she is also my calmbirth instructor so her voice and ways always are relaxing for me lol.
Her DD and my DD played 'midwives' and used the doppler and stethescope on eachother to 'listen to baby'....SO CUTE! (they are both 2.5 years old). just love having appts at home...so relaxing.
hope everyone is travelling well xx
:rofl: at your son hiding meow! DS saw a birthing scene on tv (you know the typical scream then out pops baby), so he has an idea of what happens. "mummy noisy. baby come out of mum's bum"
Great news that you Aunt will be there for your DS.
Awwww at those girls Cassius. how cute! sounds like your friend is a very handy one to have - midwife and calmbirth instructor!
Hi all, hope you're going well.
My midwife called today and I'm seeing her for the first time on the 20th (so long as noone decides to have a baby that day!). Yay.
hi ladies,
just joined up, have been reading all the fantastic information on this site!
i am 15 weeks pregnant and am planning a homebirth.
I had an interview with a midwife about 4 weeks ago but things didnt go to plan,she didnt want to take me on as she felt i was too high risk and that i need to lose some weight before i have a home birth!..i found this a little bit strange, as im sure im not the first fat chick to try have a natural birth.
anyhow, i have another interview this saturday with another midwife, hoping that my motivation to lose a few kilos (which will help me in the long run) will sit okay with her.
i really hope that i can find a midwife to help me do this homebirth.
i have a fear/phobia of hospitals, each and every visit i have ever been to has been a negative experience for me. the most recent seeing my brother in a coma after a motorbike accident which left him a quadriplegic (feb 2008).
i promised myself i would never go in a hospital again!! I am also a person who tends to not take many drugs, not even panadol for a headache, i just dont like putting these things into my body. i find relaxation, and massage and a nice hot shower a way to deal with pain.
i just wanted to say thanks to all you ladies on this forum, who have given me comfort. I find feel that i am not going to lose the weight in time for my homebirth, and that i will have to be rushed into hospital for a c section!!! i dont want this..AT ALL!! so this is why ive come to read some positivity.
My favorite thing to you tube is hypnobirth/calmbirth, its gives me energy and it makes me so excited to meet my baby (due christmas day this year) !!!
thanks again, and hope to hear from all of you
xxxxxx
Ok, I'm officially talking to myself now. But I have a question
My midwife is apparently having to take some extended leave. I don't konw what hte story is but the fill-in midwife will be doing my apt. I'm slightly anxious now - part of the big attraction of this was having my own midwife. I'm sure that whatever has come up is very important and don't begrudge her this tiem out at all. But I'm kinda worrying that I'm hardly going to see her before the birth. Or what if something else comes up again later? I'll see what the other midwife says in 2 weeks time, but what do you reckon?
(It's preemptive stress I know since I'm not even 19 weeks yet)
Sorry not to have replied to your other posts!! I think it's fair to wonder what is happening with your care and what to expect for the rest of the pregnancy & the birth. Though I wouldn't stress yet. I saw my midwife ages ago and to save money we skipped any appointments in the second trimester as I'm going well and I wont see her for another 3 weeks still. It does feel like AGES between seeing her but your appointments get more frequent in the 3rd trimester so I think it'll be a good time to cover lots of ground and really prepare for the birth. I hope the appointment goes well with the replacement midwife and she can give you an idea of what is happening.
hi girls!
marcellus: i would think that it would be fine. Like meow said, the first and second tri appts are quite spaced out (4-6 weeks) and i too found it hard to know if we could get a good connection happening (we got along well, but you know that kinda connection that you want from an IM who will be welcoming this baby with you ITMS). i have found that since hitting the final trimester and our appts getting down to every 2 weeks has BEEN GREAT! simply seeing her more often has really helped solidify the relationship.
i reckon that if you feel a bit disconnected that you should organise (finances permitting of course) to just have her come over for an extra session, even if it is not a 'necessary' appt IYKWIM. sometimes just knowing that they can come and do that is enough to get things back on track.
AFM: well i had a similar moment as Marcellus today lol! i thought our appt was today, but forgot that she goes on holiday this week :( so just checked my diary and have to wait til next week...nooooo! i really look forward to these meetings, so am bummed (also bummed at my shocking memory for fooling me lol!).
Another to agree. In the first and 2nd trimester, appts seem so far and few between, but reality is that is no different to hospital appts. Maybe it is because we look forward to them so much because they are quality appointments rather than a cattle call that we miss them. But yes, in the 3rd trimester, they become much more frequent, which is great because it really starts to develop the birthing mind frame and help you get motivated to get your space together.
And how about the whole Danni saga..... I was so annoyed to see a couple of OB's come out a say "yeah, homebirth isn't safe, see she went to hospital" when to me, it is testament that planned homebirth is safe! Oh well, at least the people around me didn't question me about it or it would have been rant time!
Marcellus, you might like the replacement MW just as much. ;) Think of it as knowing your back-up option JIC!
THanks for the replies. I did like the fill-in midwife, but she isn't my backup. I haven't met my primary or backup yet, but I do still have lots of time.
I guess I'll just see how we go for now. I spose it's always a possibility that my primary midwife wouldn't be available at the end or somethign anyway. I'm sure I'll feel better once I've actually gotten to know my midwife... or any midwife... I guess I feel like I'm just hanging at the moment, but perhaps that's pretty normal at this stage of the pregnancy. All very boring and normal.
I hae it when I get dates wrong like that Cassius! Especially when it's something I'm looking forward to.
Hope you're all travelling well.
totally agree that in a way it is nice to know the 'whole' team ITMS. cause there is always a possibility that there is a birth-a-thon and you might miss out on your primary midwife lol! this is why i insisted with DH that we go to our 'meet the midwives' nights that our organisation has, simply cause i wanted to at least have laid eyes on some of the team and get a feel for the overall vibe. have to say that i am pretty comfy with having any of them, but of course i still :pray: that Nicola makes it lol!
I also agree it's when the appts get closer together that the relationship really develops. The first 2 trimesters were about us getting to know each other and me being neurotic about everything :redface: Recently we've been concentrating more on me being in the right head space for birth and trusting the people in the room as well as how to deal with things once the baby arrives. It's more "emotional" now IFKWIM.
The appt after next we start meeting the 2nd and back-up midwives. I'm still hoping our IM is available on the day, though I've been assured that in the middle of things, you don't usually care who walks through the door, so long as it's someone competent and calm.
How's everyone going with preparation? We're working our way through our list of things to prepare for the birth, but I also want to pack my hospital bag soon, just so I know it's there and taken care of for just in case.
As for the Dannii "homebirth" thing. Of course OBs have a vested interest in saying it doesn't work :rolleyes:, when obviously the transfer did work. For me the whole OB thing is about a trade war, with women and babies used as bargaining chips in the middle..... gets me more than a little irate.
I hope everyone is well
I am slowly getting things together in my 'labour/birth bag'. i figured that being so vague and if it's anything like last time (i forgot my labour and hospital bag when i went in LOL!) i need to have it all in one place ITMS. so have put in there my fit ball (deflated obviously lol), my massage oils, essential oils, (the oil burner is in use daily ATM so not in the bag), have a few dark sarongs thrown in there to wrap myself up in, bottle of lavender hydrating mist and DH has been ferreting away bottles of water and gatorade (he gets them given to him at soccer lol). I have also thrown in a suit for bubba (i'm going to have it laid out on the couch to 'remind' myself why i am there lol). But i have been MEGA slack in organising some music. i need to get onto it as i love the distraction it brings and will help me lock out outside interference (ie a toddler lol).:
the birth pool is booked and will arrive 22 August, then we just need to work out if the fittings and hose are long enough...
have also been busy 'nesting' with the house. bought a bunch of beautiful candles to burn during labour etc as well. our room is pretty much all set up now with a comfy breastfeeding chair (hoping that bf in bed will be more comfy this time...DD was so tiny that it just was too hard for a long time there). got a side table in for my gallons of water that i seem to need to down at every feed, the bassinette is in place as is the cot and changetable. *cluck cluck cluck* lol!
that's about it so far! but i am getting antsy now and just want things in place. DD came at 38 weeks and i just wasnt in the 'zone' so am hoping to get myself there and ready from this point on...
Hi everyone!
Talked to my MW yesterday and she said that we wont meet until after 20weeks? Not sure how i feel? Think i am ok seeing i dont feel like i need my hand held seeing its our 4th but then i miss out of hearing the HB...
I might go off to the GP.
Tash i packed a sort of hospital bag. Not very full, thought if i transfered in a hurry they i wouldnt need much and my DH and mum could get anything else i needed!
That's a long time to wait Tegam.
Sounds like you're pretty much ready to go Cassius :)
I guess the transfer bag would be the same sorts of things you'd pack if planning a hospital birth?
I can't quite get my head around the hb transfer = not safe logic. I gues the naysayers are trying to suggest that since so many HB mums transfer (though, dodgy stats hey?) obviously it's not a safe place to birth even if you're categorised as low risk...? Anyone know what the actual transfer rate is Aus-wide? For the CMP it's around 25% I think.
Personally I think the fact that mums & bubs are transferred when they need to be shows that midwives are capable of ensuring safe births and providing excellent maternal care.
Tegam, are you using Andrea Codega? I am too, and don't have my booking in appointmnet until after 20wks, which I'm not enjoying since I have soo many questions!:
tegam: hmm even if it's your first, fifth or tenth baby we all want to be cared for! 20 weeks does sound like a long time to wait to meet this person and get a feel for them?? my midwife asked me if i was ok having 6 weekly appts in the beginning but after the first 6 week wait i quickly went back to 4 lol! i think with a HB it's even more on us to like the person and have a relationship with them.
marcellus: the transfer rate with our group is 20%. of that they say that it is mostly due to maternal exhaustion, posterior labours and first-time labours where mum gets exhausted and hubby gets anxious. so the stats the naysayers are giving us is not really indicitive of 'emergency' transfer stats alone IYKWIM. but i'm with you, all a transfer tells me is that the HB system is more than capable of 'handling' birth and its various manifestations.
Hey everyone i want to to share what i did for my "transfer bag"
i had a basket that had a change of clothes for me some pads nappies and baby clothes in it.. but these were all things i needed after birth no matter where i was.. so by having them in the basket they were easy to grab but it didnt enter my head that i had a just in case bag..itms?
hmmm i dont have a transfer bag...but then i did forget my bag when i had a hospital birth too LOL! so i guess it can be done without one if the need arises lol. oh gosh, poor dh would have to find everything lol!
We're doing a transfer bag more for superstition. If it's packed and ready to go, we won't need it (hopefully). If it's not packed, we will..... not rational but my MW is pretty convinced it's worked liked that with others. I just have to figure out how much stuff I really need to pack. Meanwhile, we're also working through the list of stuff to have at home for the homebirth - blankets, mirror, plastic bags, mattress protectors, rescue remedy, gastrolyte.... Then there's the list of stuff we need once bubby arrives - I'm dreaming lists atm :)
We have piles of food frozen at least, though I need to stop eating it and save it for later. BTW - pie makers are a fantastic idea and so easy to use and then freeze individual pies....
oh i love the pie idea thanks!
:dance: Woo hoo! Scott just called Sunshine about the HB program, and they're passing my info onto the midwife who'll probably be in charge of my care! She'll call me back next week to discuss everything, and I'm super optimistic :)
So, if I may, I'll be joining you lovely ladies :)
You may Teni :)