When a Wedding goes terribly wrong...

thread: When a Wedding goes terribly wrong...

  1. When a Wedding goes terribly wrong...

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    When a Wedding goes terribly wrong...

    I had a family relative marry recently and during the reception there was a massive fight broke out between some members of the bridal party.
    It got so messy police were called in and AVO's were put in place(by police).

    The bride was called a "whore" (she is the most sweetest, kindest person I know) and was called this name by her MIL(to be)...my sister.

    I feel sad for her and was wondering if I should step in and just send her a card to say I'm hoping she is doing ok.

    The MIL(sister) is not able to speak to her or her son because the police put an AVO in place.
    Wondering if this relationship will ever mend?

    The bride's hubby is a close relative of mine.(nephew)

    I feel sad for them both as they had to have their honeymoon delayed(cause of AVO). They managed to get away.

    Wondering how these relationships could recover.
    There were other AVOS put in order by the police.

     
  2. When a Wedding goes terribly wrong...

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    Re: When a Wedding goes terribly wrong...

    Was the fight over the inappropriate dress?

    It's up to your sister to repair the relationship with her son but there should be nothing stopping you from maintaining a relationship with your nephew and his wife.
     
  3. When a Wedding goes terribly wrong...

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    Re: When a Wedding goes terribly wrong...

    I think this is a situation where you stay completely out of the fight. If it's nothing to do with you, don't get involved.

    As for if the relationships can be repaired, that's for those in the relationship to decide/work on. Sometimes, just because you're family, doesn't mean you'll get along. Not every parent/child relationship is wonderful. In this case, I think it's up to your nephew to decide what he wants to do about his relationship with his mum. If this is too much and he wants to end it, then so be it.

    That said, your relationship with your nephew and his new wife is separate. If you want to congratulate them on their marriage and see how they're doing, go ahead. I'd maybe not bring up the fight though, they may not want to discuss it. Also be prepared to potentially be put in the middle of it all by either your sister, your nephew, or his wife. If you have a relationship with all of them one or another may ask you not to see the other, or may ask for information, or to pass on a message. In that case, just make it clear you're not getting involved.
     
  4. When a Wedding goes terribly wrong...

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    Re: When a Wedding goes terribly wrong...

    Oh no 😞 I would send a card and let them know you are supporting them and wish them well. I remember your post about the dress too, it sounds like your sister wanted the wedding to be about her not the bride and groom what a mess she has created.
     
  5. When a Wedding goes terribly wrong...

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    Re: When a Wedding goes terribly wrong...

    That must have been some dress.

    And that's really fast for AVOs, and it must have been a shocker of a fight for there to be multiple police initiated AVOs to be put in place.

    I'm also wondering what your nephew and his wife did, to make it such that they have an AVO meaning they're not allowed to travel, or something else meaning their honeymoon was delayed. Or did they just have to go to Court?

    When you say "They managed to get away." I hope you don't mean that they breached an AVO ... that's serious business. They should probably get some legal advice.

    Not sure why you think it would be "stepping in" to "just send her a card to say I'm hoping she is doing ok". You're her aunt now, right? If there's enough of a relationship there for you to care about her -- or you believe that there will be a relationship possible -- then just send a card. It's from you to her, it's got nothing to do with your sister. You can have relationships independent of your sister.

    Your sister's actions (and the others fighting) are on them, just focus on your own.
     
  6. When a Wedding goes terribly wrong...

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    Re: When a Wedding goes terribly wrong...

    I would contact your nephew and his wife, not mention the fight, and ask how the honeymoon was, invite them around for a cuppa.
     
  7. When a Wedding goes terribly wrong...

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    Re: When a Wedding goes terribly wrong...

    You can still maintain a relationship with both your nephew and his wife, for all you know it could be important to him to know that not everyone in his family feels/acts the same way that his mother does. But you will need to be prepared that some in the family may not like it and give you trouble over it, especially your sister. So you will need to make it very clear that their issues are not yours and you will not tolerate being stuck in the middle of it.