Bonding

sometimes stretching the babies till 4 hours seemed only to suit the nurses not the babies. As soon as Maria got home she wanted 2.5-3hourly feeds not the 4 hour crap, I fed her when she needed to be fed, and got in return a lovely happy baby.

Tiff
Sounds like time to bring out the big guns
How dare that midwife speak to like that!!
Is there someone that can speak up for you i.e the kids paed,or a midwife you get along with. Sounds like she is trying to bully you, but if she had someone stand up to her - maybe she will relax and crawl back to her corner.

Another suggestion is to see about hiring or finding out about a lactation consulatant to come down to special care. Especially someone with twin experience and even premmie experience. She might be able to work with the nurses to set up a amicable rountine that could continue when you leave and help you become more comfortable with feeding Ivy and Noah

God dam it ****es me when they throw their weight around. You feel helpless and crappy enough as it is and then they try this power trip thing.

Don't take it personally - she is just a *****!!!!
take care hon
and hang in there - they will be home sooo soon now.

My two came home at 36 weeks at 1.7 and 2.1kg so once the feeding is there - you surely to god must be otta there!!!
It was only that one of the midwives had twins herself that i got it happening enough to get home

take care
odette
mum to ariel and immogen -5/12/2002

Tiff - I am horrified at the hard time you're having! Well done you at continuing to BF, that is so fantastic. I have to say though, it sounds as if your babies aren't long from coming home with you which is something. Have they given you any idea of when they'll be coming home?

I would definately voice your concerns at NICU... You vent here any time you need to. I can't believe the pressure they are putting on you, the time you need more support than at any other time.

Well done to Ivy and Noah for gaining weight! I can't believe they are still topping up the feeds for them! Babies demand feed, rarely will they wait the full 4 hours! Hang in there Tiff, you are doing a fantastic job.

Becc - I'm fine. Tired, but ok... :shock:

How are you??

Hi girls!
THANK YOU SO much for your support. I had a long hard think about things that night and decided I would just bottle Noah with EBM until I get them home, I just want to go home now. When we get home I will put him back on the breast and we will fiddle around all we like!
Until then, I will just play their game.

I will get back on later but just wanted to pop on and say thankyou

Tiff

I am so sorry that the midwives are not supporting you and your choices, but I know that I ended up doing the same as you, doing whatever they wanted so that I could get my baby home sooner. Its great that Noah and Ivy are putting on weight and thriving! You are such an inspiration to me!
We are here for you anytime you need to vent, we all know how frustrating it is to try to be a supermum and to have nurses that dont support you is soo wrong!

Hayley is doing okay now, well, I think so, guess I will find out next week when I go back to the MCHN, but she seems to be okay. Still have another hearing test to do soon, hopefully she will pass this one.

As for me I am not coping too well with being a mum, I think being separated from her when she was born has really done some damage to our bonding, I am not as connected with her as I would like, but I am trying.

Well, its starting to look like another premmie is on the way!

Went to the OB today and she told me that the team is referring me to melb (RWH). My appt is on the 31st Jan. at 9.10am( god knows what time I'm going to have to leave home!)
They want me to have a scan done but there are no appts. available.

Looks like another premmie will be in here soon, Ob wants to see me in Melb on the 31st Jan. If the dopplers show that the blood flow in the brain has decreased then bub will have a transfusion before birth and then they are anticipating birth at 27+weeks

Jess

I have everything crossed for you, hopefully they are just being overly cautious. What an awful time for an appt especially when you have so far to travel too and the fact that school starts that day and the roads will be worse than ever! Please let us know how you go.

will be thinking of you!

I'm actually trying to change that date now as I don't want to miss Tim's first ay of school.

Jess - Hope everything turns out ok...it is very frightening the prospect of having such a prem baby, but everything will be fine. We are always here whenever you need us! Keep us updated. \:D/

Dinky - I am so glad that it's not just me that finds bonding so hard. Seren is 8 months old now. How long was your babe in NICU for? Seren was 6 weeks in hospital.


Tiff - How are things?

Love Gwen xx

Tiff, good to hear that you've got a plan. Obviously it would be better if you were getting the support you needed from the staff at the hospital, but you do what you are comfortable with and what you need to do to get those bubs home. How are they going with their feeds? Any word on how close they actually are to coming home? I'm going away today for one night, so I will check in tomorrow when I get home for the latest news. Thinking of you all and hope all is well.

Gwen, I am good thanks. The same as you actually - tired, but fine, lol!

Jess, what a scary time for you. It is good to hear that the doctors are keeping a really close eye on you though. It sounds like your bub will be in good hands. It is amazing the things that can do for our bubs these days! Please let us know how you go.

Dinky, Hi! I'm sorry to hear that you have been having a rough time. It's so hard when you miss out on those precious first moments with your bub, isn't it? It must have been especially hard for you with Hayley being sent to a different hospital. Let us know how she goes next week.

Gwen

I feel so much better knowing that I am not the only one having trouble with bonding! Hayley was taken from me as soon as she was born, I saw her for about 2 minutes 7 hours after birth and then she was transferred to NICU at a hospital in the city! The only thing I got was a polaroid photo when she was 4 hours old, that was on Thursday and I didnt see her again until Saturday night at 9pm, which is when I officially had my first 3 minute cuddle. Hayley was kept in special care for the next 2 1/2 weeks, until I was finally allowed to bring her home.

I have to say that I still have a lot of issues with the bonding and also the way that they staff treated me while she was in special care. Hayley wasnt allowed out of the nursery and only 2 visitors at a time, which made it really hard for her older sisters, but they at least got a cuddle before me when they went to visit in NICU.

Jess - I hope that they can give you a decent date and time, the first day of school is so special, although the kids just dont seem to care, I always get teary.

Becc - How are you doing?

Tiff - I hope that you are doing okay and managing to rest a little, although I know how hard it is to do that. Huge hugs to you and I hope that Noah and Ivy will be allowed home with you soon. How is your Dad doing?

Hey Dinky, I am doing well thanks. O:) It's been ages since we've "chatted". How is everything going with you? How are all your girls doing?

Tiff, any news? How are those gorgeous little bubs of yours? How are you?

hpw is everything going with your little premmies, I had a wonderful afternoon with Maria, she now laughs when I go peekaboo at her. It is nice to see that even though she was 6 weeks early and is so little still, that she is as developed mentally as much as her age peers.

WTG Louise, it is wonderful isn't it when they do things like "normal". I know our little boy was born 8wks early & so many of the Dr's & midwives kept handing out the "now I want you to be prepared that he may be a little slower than others his age at doing things", well all I can say is he is now 3.5yrs & we are still waiting for him to be slow at something!!

Hope she continues to thrive for you.

I was fully prepared for her to lag behind developmentally, but except for smiling (not till 10 weeks) she has been on target with her age peers, just 2 kilos lighter.

My little NICU/SCN baby is now 10 months old and she is doing really well.Things were pretty rough for the first 4 months but after that she seemed to just jump over those disruptions and has really come along.
She is walking slowly but by herself.

Hi girls,

Well, after much talking and planning I am really very pleased to announce that we are ALL home!!!!!!!!!!

Took some beautiful photos today, will try to put them up on the website.

OMG Tiff what wonderful news for you guys!!

Ivy & Noah must be going great guns for you to have made it home. Hope that the rest of the journey is nothing but onwards & upwards for you all.

How heavy are the twins now, if you don't mind me asking?

And just think that now you are home you can have all the support you need at feeding time with hubby around.

Look forward to more great news from you soon.

Yay Tiff! So glad to hear Ivy and Noah are home. Hopefully you can relax and enjoy them now, IYKWIM.

That is fantastic news Tiff! The twins will go great guns from now!

Yay tiff!!!!! Well done to all!!!

They are absolutely beautiful.

Well done you xx

Yay Tiff!! Great news! :D

I had a feeling that might have happened when we didn't hear from you for a little while!

How are Ivy & Noah settling in at home? How are the rest of the kids? How are you feeling? When you've got a spare few minutes, you'll have to update us.

Can't wait to see some new pics!

Love

Hey Becc,
Everyone is good. We are settling in very slowly. The first night was hell on a stick! It is either getting better or we are all getting used to sleep deprivation!

I am feeling thrilled, amazed, scared, sad and in awe of these tiny little creatures.

The kids are good but are finding it hard to keep their hands away, even when they are asleep. It is a learning experience for all of us, especially me, who has to learn that my almost ten tear olds are quite capable of holding a baby (even my eight year old is full of confidence) and I have to take a deep breath and let them.

More phots just uploaded. They are from yesterday.

Tiff i am so pleased the twins are now home with you all.
They are just so cute. I love the picture of Noah sleeping.

Love the new photos Tiff - how cute are they?!

I'm glad to hear you are all good. It sounds like the big kids are loving having the bubs home. And I can just imagine you hovering over them while they hold Ivy and Noah! ;)

I hope that the rest of your settling in period goes smoothly...I will be thinking of you and hoping that you can get *some* sleep!

Thanks for the update...stay in touch and keep the piccies coming!

Love

Tiff those photos are gorgeous, Noah looked really comfy in that sleeping pic

Have to agree that the photo of Noah asleep is just adorable.

How are you finding life Tiff? O:)

Love Gwen x

Hey Girls, how are you all doing? O:)

How are the twins doing, Tiff? You must be SO busy! Hope everything is going well...

Love

All good here. Seren is 13lb5oz now, and is 8 and half months old. Apparently, when she turns one, they will no longer make any allowances for her being prem anymore! I'm a bit concerned that she's not sitting, crawling etc - but her mental development is fantastic, which is good.

I've started new medication to keep my blood pressure under control which is making me really sleepy - not good, with active baby all day! I wish I could wake myself up a bit more! :shock:

How is everyone else? How are you gettig on Becc?

Gwen ~ Seren is doing so well. I wouldn't worry about her not sitting up yet or crawling. Kimberley never rolled and didn't crawl till she was 9 and half months old.

I'm so pleased everyones babies are doing so well.

I now look at Kimberley and can not believe she was born 4lb 13oz she turns 3 next month and i think what happened to that small baby.
Even Alex has done so well he is now 10kilos and was born 3 weeks early.

Hi, well Maria seems to be at the end of another growth spurt, for the last 4 days she has been feeding every 3 hours day and night, but last night she slept for 5.5hours straight which was great for me.

Welshgirl - are you feeling any better? I was told the same as you for Maria, ie after she turns 1 they won't take any allowances for being a premmie. Don't worry too much about the rolling and crawling at least you can do things around the house and know you baby is on the mat where you left her.

Hi Kitten - glad Maria is sleeping a little longer for you now. It makes such a difference! \:D/

Hi Girls,

It's great to hear how well everyone's bubs are doing. It's interesting to hear what you have been told, Gwen and Louise, about not having allowances made for your bubs being premmie after they turn one. I hadn't heard that. I did read somewhere that most prem babies will have caught up to their peers by the time they turn 4, although a lot will do so earlier, even by 12-15 months.

I do understand your concerns though, Gwen, about reaching milestones. I worry about stuff like that sometimes too. It's hard seeing other bubs who are the same age or younger doing things that your bub isn't. I think Josh is doing well for his corrected age so far though. I take him to a prem playgroup once a month where we meet with physiotherapists, occupational and speech therapists and they check all the bubs over to see how they are going. At the last one, the physio told me a few things that Josh should be doing by the next playgroup (which is in a couple of weeks time) and he is doing them all, so that is a relief.

Everything else is going well. Josh is getting into a bit more of a routine now which is good. He generally only wakes for one feed during the night too which means a little bit more sleep for us! He is noticing his surroundings a lot more now and is more interactive. I love it!

Michelle, it sounds like Alex is doing really well. (And Kimberley too). How has he been going with all his milestones, etc?

Tiff, still thinking of you! I hope everything is going ok!

Kirsty, How are you and bubs doing? Did you end up hearing anything back from the other mods re a general chatter thread in here? Sorry, I don't mean to be pushy, was just wondering!

Just an update to the above post...I'm a bit excited because Josh started rolling today! From his back onto his side. I think he was really proud of himself too, because once he realised he could do it, he kept doing it - from his back to his side to his back and so on...It was so cute!

Oh Becc, that is so fab!! You must be so proud.

Seren doesn't roll over yet!! aargh!! 8-[

Becc ~ Alex is a little behind with his milestones. He sat on his own around 7 months but not properly until 7.5months. He had rolled a couple of times before 7months but he has only just strated to roll a bit more in the last few days. He loves to stand and he can crawl backwards and in cirlces he is really trying to go forwards and i think he will get there soon.

I'm so pleased to hear Josh is doing so well.

Michelle - How heavy was Alex born?

hi girls, just thought i'd pop in.

We are all doing ok busy and hectic. Noah refuses the breast now point blank, just arches his back and screams. Ivy is a good feeder though.
It hurts a bit but can't worry about it too much. Noah is 3kgs now, Ivy is 2.6kgs

I'm typing one handed with two babies in the hug a bub waiting to be bathed, just have to tuck the others in a we'll be right.

Did you all have to keep up with the vitamins and iron when you went home?

miss you all, will catch up soon