Parenting after Miscarriage or Loss ~ December 09

I hope that your nan can choose the treatment or otherwise that's best for her & that she has kind and compassionate carers on her journey.

Big big cuddles Willow :hug:

Willow - sending you big :hug: hun.

Thanks girls :hug:

Deb - For the time being my Mum and 4 aunties will care for her at home. What happens on the journey ahead we'll have to wait and see. Mum is going home for a week tonight, she's been in Sydney since Christmas but will be back next week.

Sounds like it has been the day for the little people comforting mummy :redface:

Willow - a plan is good. Still here if you need anything :hug:

Apologies here girls, it has been a rough week or three so I haven't been very good on personals :(

DS was sleeping poorly (again) although he has now improved.

DD is having a shocker. Not sleeping, STILL teething, and now has a fever of 39 with bulging eardrums and a red throat :doh: It is only viral but OMG she is a clingy, unhappy little monkey.
Mummy didn't help by working 5 out of the last 6 days so she won't let me out of her sight or my nipple out of her mouth.

AND my morning (all day) sickness has just peaked again when it had eased off. Food is not my friend and it is hard to sort things for the little ones too. So a tired, incredibly nauseous and fatigued mummy is not coping very well ATM. It is times like this I miss having family close for an hours respite to nap.

To top it off I got hit in the face with a (thankfully small) can of chick peas in the supermarket today and have a nice shiner with a little cut just under my right eye!! DS was distressed because mummy was crying and there was blood - he wanted to get mummy a "handaid" for her blood (bandaid ;)) sweet little man he is. An emotional, overtired, pregnant woman getting injured in a supermarket and only one lovely lady checking I was ok as I sobbed was just too much.

And just before bed DD vomited - everywhere. And I nearly did too. Poor DH had to deal with it while I stopped retching :redface: I am shocking at the moment. I just can't do it.

So from a very sooky la la me - I am sorry I haven't acknowledged many posts lately. I will be back soon and I am sending prayers to the sleep fairies for a few consecutive hours sleep because the hourly wake ups are killing me quicker than I thought they would.

On a positive - I had a midwives appointment on Monday and we are going to try to fit me in to the midwifery group practice for continuity of care in collaboration with the high risk doctor and then slot me into the "comfy room" (they have 3) in the delivery suite - the closest equivalent to a birth centre that I will get with my history. I may get a waterbirth yet :dance:

BBL :grouphug:

It sounds like a lot of us are having a rough time at the moment. Big big :hug: all round.

kelly - glad to hear all is well, even though you are not as far along as you thought. As you said, this always happens so is nothing to worry about! Have a great time in Perth with your family sweetie.

Michelle - you sound like you really are having a shocking time of it! I hope the sleep fairies visit you tonight in a big way! I got up to DD about 20 times last night and pretty much gave up on sleep altogether so i can feel your pain. I hope DD gets better soon. And yay on getting into the comfy room - sounds like this birth will be a very special one :)

Willow - big :hug: sweetie. I am glad that your nan has been given a choice and that there is treatment she can have, but I know this must be so hard for you and your family. It sounds like she is very lucky to have such a supportive family around to care for her.

bek - how are you going?

Spring - LOVE the pics of your little man, what a cutie!

Lee - I agree, sometimes OBs just seem too relaxed or else don't check your history. I pointed out to mine that I was hospitalised with high BP around this time with DD and I thought going 2 weeks without an appointment at this stage wasn't a good idea so he said to just pop in this week and get a midwife to check my BP rather than schedule an actual appointment. I am going in tomorrow to get it checked out and then have my next OB appointment next week, so hopefully if there is a problem it will be picked up in time. You are right - it can happen so quickly and it was the same with me last time so better to be safe than sorry!

Freya - big :hug: sweetie, it sounds like you have way too much to deal with at the moment.

mako - how are you sweetie?

Rach - good to hear from you. You must have been so terrified when Evangeline's alarm went off, I can only imagine the panic you must have felt. Lee, same for you when Flynn's alarm went off, sooo terrifying. Glad your little ones are fine despite the heart attack that must have given you!

I don't have much more news from last time I posted. Still huge and fed up and wanting this baby to come out now. His head is down so low I feel like he is half way out sometimes! And the BHs are so so painful. Not sure what to do with DD tomorrow to keep her entertained either.

Hi to everyone else :)

Michelle Praying the sleep fairies visit your house tonight and stay for a few nights so you can catch up on some much needed rest. Oh and OUCH on the shiner. Hope its a little better in the morning :hug:

Rach OMG hun naughty Evangeline for doing that to you :shakehead: Looking forward to seeing you tomorrow and thanks for driving past my place while we were away ;)

Willow Sending you a massive :hug: hun. I hope your Nan is a comfortable as she possibly can be. Sounds like she has a great support network around to help care for her at home. Remember where I am if you need to chat too :hug: Oh and I've been meaning to let you know the flowers you sent me lasted nearly 2 weeks. I took them away with me as I couldn't bare to leave them at home without getting fresh water :)

Kelly I meant to say earlier YAY on your appt yesterday. A good strong heartbeat is wonderful. Enjoy your time back in Perth.

Jayne How is your BIL doing? Your girls are just too cute wanting to stay home watching DVD's instead of shopping. I'm sure that'll change in years to come lol.

Deb How are you going? Any news on the potential move?

Hi to everyone. Hope you're all doing ok.

Oh Michelle you poor honey. :hug: Bloody chick peas I knew vegetarianisim was bad for you! :lol:
I hope you get some sleep - I am sorry things have been so hard. :hug:

I haven't got my phone as Miss Immy very kindly flung it from the trolley on Christmas Eve - I gave it to her in an attempt to extend her "use by date"... :cry: So, thankfully it's insured but until they either repair it or send me a new one I have an old phone DD14 was using before she had it confiscated (we won't even begin to go there...:wall:). So, I have no numbers in it - and I can't text very efficiently without the iphone touch screen... So, no messages from me. But I am thinking of you. :hug:

Willow it sounds like you have a loving family to support your Nan. :hug:

Bun I hope your baby comes soon - just remember this too shall pass. This pregnancy will sooon be over and you will be holding your little boy in your arms.

Spring: You are in my thoughts constantly. I hope little Ben is doing well :hug:

Good thing I had steak for dinner Inanna :rofl: The chick peas were out to get me - so much for trying to be healthy and stick to low GI :lol: It will pass. Just a difficult few weeks and missing support. I think I will skip work tomorrow and take her to the doctors. Not for the viral part but the last 2 fevers resulted in vomit and I want to check it isn't a UTI. That's 2 fevers in the past 2 weeks.

Mako - good to see you :hug:

Another rough trot here... woke up this morning with one eye swollen shut. Severe allergic conjunctivitis, I'm told. It's more than likely so bad because I got off prednisone a couple of months ago after being on it for a very long time. Ironically, I'm being treated with prednisone and had my first 25mg dose this morning... and I already hate myself! I'm grumpy, aggressive and do not cope at all well if Sam decides to be uncooperative. I feel like I'm fat and bloated again already and I could swear I've already gone straight back to the hated moonface look that I'd only just lost! :( I'm not doing the full 3-4 days at 25mg - I'm going to taper the dose as of tomorrow.

And just to make things really good - I now have a twitch in the eyelid of that eye! My vision was blurry even though we'd got the eye open, now it's just impossible!

Hopefully after we've all had a good grumble we'll start to feel better. Sending hugs to all that need them - can't sit at the computer any longer with the state of my eye.

BW

Sending lots of :hug: to those who need them

BW: hope your eye is ok

AFM: not much happening, DD is becoming more aware of what she's doing in her nappy, so we'll hopefully make a start with TT in a few weeks. DD is 2 in 19 days so looking forward to that, she is growing up way too fast.

Michelle - OMG.. attack of the chick peas!! You poor thing, hope the shiner isn't too bad and praying you start getting some sleep!

Bonham - Wow.. I'm so jealous that DD is nearly ready for some toilet training... we're not having any luck at all over here.. DS will be 3 in May and is soooo not interested.. he's happy to sit in his dirty nappy all day.. it's disgusting and driving me MAD!!

BW - Big hugs hun.. sounds like you need lots of them!

Deb - Hope the new year has been kind to you so far. Hugs.

Mako - How are you doing hun? You haven't really said much about it all. Hope you're ok and know that we're here for you.. whenever you're ready to let it all out!

Bun - Hope you're hanging in there.. not long now, although I'm sure it feels like forever!

Willow - More hugs. Sounds like you have a wonderful family supporting your Nan.

Big hello to everyone else.

AFM - I'm so up and down at the moment. Felt pretty good yesterday and was very proud of myself being all positive and telling myself it's all going to be ok time.. this bub is going to stick and grow nice and healthly... and now, today, I'm feeling all deflated again and scared that it's going to fall apart. I just wish there was more I could do.. I'd do anything to make this one stick... as we all would. It's just really frustrating.. not knowing. Only have to get through the next 8 days now so I just have to keep busy.. and only 3 days till we fly to Perth.. so that will help!!

DS was soooo naughty yesterday so I'm praying for a better day today. Had some removalists in this morning to help me move some furniture around the house.. as we still don't really know many people in Melb.. we had noone to help us move stuff... very frustrating to have to waste money but at least its all done and I just have to sort all the bits and pieces out now.. can't wait to have the house in order... finally!

Hope everyone is well. Like a few of us.. I'm feeling a bit down in the dumps, which sucks coz I should be jumping with joy.. damn first trimester crap!

Kel xxx

Kelly - dont feel bad about DS, mine is nearly 3.5 and still not potty trained in any way shape or form. We've had to can preschool this year even though he really needs to go because he just wont train. Its driving me batty, bloody lazy boys lol

Hi guys

just coming up for some air. B is settling in perfectly. O is just such a good big brother, he is being really quite helpful. He is very over excited though so hopefully he calms in the next few days.

I've had my first feed non stop moment. B fed from 4pm until 11.30pm last night pretty much non stop. Result is that I have plenty of milk today but it was a tiring night. As soon as he came off he'd scream and the only way to fix it was to reattach. I know he is just trying to stimulate my supply so I'm not worried.

Sorry for the lack of personals, I haven't even had a chance to read through the pages of posts. Just wanted to pop in and let you know I'm back (well sort of).

Freya: Hun, would you be able to recommend a good bf friendly GP in T'ville? I was just wondering who you used for your boys?

Thanks to everyone for the congrats. When I've got a moment I'll update my ticker.
Lv Spring xx

ETA: Willow: Huge hugs babe :comfort: I just read about your Nan. I'm so sorry your family are going through this babe.

Welcome back Spring - I am so happy that B is settling in so well. Big cuddles xxx

So glad B has settled into your family nicely Spring, he is so beautiful, well done :)

I never really had a regular GP as we hardly had to use one up there and if I had any feeding concerns or general health queries I just asked my midwife. Whereabouts are you living? I could ask my midwife if she knows of any bf friendly ones.

Michelle - wow what a rough time. Please look after yourself

Kell - Hugs I this journey is so hard

BW - Get better soon ok.

Freya - I bet all works out in and falls into place as it should. Stay strong and true to your dreams..very hard to do I know, but you've got the ability

I am at my wits end with Eva's lack of sleep. It takes me hours during the day to get her to have just one sleep, then she is waking 2 hourly at night. Feeding at night used to be nice and calm but now she is pulling, tugging moving and wide awake!!!! I am freakin exhausted..I am trying to watch for sleep ques but I am getting it wrong. She'll rest whilst feeding for 20 mins here and there but is fully alert the minute I put her down. I am over it...ok rant over

Kelly I wish I could make the 1st tri go faster for you. Try not to worry about L not being toilet trained yet. Sage isn't too interested either so I'm not forcing him. I'm sure they'll get it when they are ready and yes some boys can be lazy when it comes to this :hug:

Bek Sending you a :hug: too. I hope E starts sleeping a bit better for you soon.

Freya How are you doing? Know we are all here if you need to talk.

Spring Welcome back hun. The pics of B are just adorable.

Bun How are you doing today? I've been thinking of you and wanted to say if you feel you need to see your Ob more often then make sure he accomadates you. Can't wait to see your BA. Do you have anyone lined up to do your announcement?

Michelle Thanks for the chat last night on FB. You really gave me some things to think about. Did the sleep fairies visit you last night?

Willow How are you? I've been thinking about you and your Nan :hug:

Rach It was lovely to see you today. Sorry I didn't chat much but I felt like I was going to cry (like I did when I started to talk :redface: )and didn't want to do that there.

Sorry for not really talking much about me. I just have no idea where to start. I have posted a bit about what happened in the "Stories of Loss" thread on here.

Sage and I went to a friends baby shower this morning. I wasn't going to go but ended up making myself go and am pleased I did. It was very hard and like I said to Rach I felt like I wanted to cry the whole time. Seeing a pregnant women was hard(of course its not her fault) and seeing 2 little bubs was lovely but hard too(not their fault either). Just got me wondering if I'll ever get to be preg again or get to cuddle and smell my own newborn again or if Sage was my only chance. Not too sure how I'd cope if that was the way things are meant to be :(
I rang my Ob again this morning and they said they'll call me by Friday with an appt time. I have an appt to see my GP next Monday afternoon too.

Mako - Hugs. What you did by going to the baby shower is very brave, your a strong woman. I felt very similar after my miscarriages and I used to look at Sara and think how lucky I was just to have her and she was my main reason for staying sane. But I still needed to have another baby if that makes sense. My days/nights would be filled with questions about why my body wasn't working etc. In the end I gave in to thinking and just trusted that if I could do it once I could do it again. I really don't know why I just typed all that, but I felt I needed to.

Thanks for the hug. I am considering sleep school for this little one.