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Thread: Yes, it IS too much to ask...

  1. #1

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    Angry Yes, it IS too much to ask...

    GRRRRR!

    Alll I want is for ONE WAKE-UP to not involve me. ONE. Not even one night. I've resigned already to the fact that I'll have to wake up a few times a night to Jazz. but is it TOO MUCH TO ASK for Shel to do ONE FRIGGEN WAKE-UP ONCE A WEEK? Not every night. Not even on nights when she works the next day. Just on ONE NIGHT A WEEK all I ask is that she get up ONCE and rock Jazz back to sleep.

    She did last night, and after 5 minutes (not even...) she put her back down and left her to cry, and got back into bed.

    So I got up, and snapped at her "oh, I forgot, she's my daughter at night, not our daughter".

    I meant this as a sarcastic comment on the fact that she gets out of night duty, and has since day one. I can count on my hands the amount of times she's gotten up. But Shel got up, slammed doors, yelled and carried on... at 3am So it became all about her. I think she was just feeling guilty about how TRUE that statement actually is.

    Of course, after the commotion, Jazz didn't get back to sleep. So I've been up since 3am.

    So yes, apparently it IS too much to ask that ONE WAKE-UP does not involve me.



    It's not too much for her to expect that during the week NO wake-ups involve her. Actually, she gets ****ty if she so much as HEARS Jazz wake-up.

    But of course, I can't even have a SLEEP-IN. Anything past 6am is a sleep-in these days. Despite giving her one every Sunday, I do NOT get one on Mondays.




  2. #2

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    oh hun.
    i'm so sorry this is happening.
    Sending you lots of
    Hope you guys can work it out.
    xx

  3. #3

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    No advice just offering a big cyber it seems terribly unfair on you Leasha Come down to Vic and crash a night at my place then Shel will have to get up to little Jazz and give you ONE night off.

    Nae x

  4. #4

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    Quote Originally Posted by ~Leasha~ View Post
    So yes, apparently it IS too much to ask that ONE WAKE-UP does not involve me.
    I'm right there with ya hun...my DH has NOT got up ONCE in the night since Jack was born! But of course...they do have to go to work.

    for you Leash.

  5. #5

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    Oh hun Its really tough when you have to do it all hey I know exactly how you feel Hope you can work something out xx

  6. #6

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    So I shouldn't complain about the fact that DH went to bed at 9pm last night with Miss M, and then I finally got to bed around 11 after cleaning up the kitchen, making his lunch etc, then she woke up at 11.40 and didn't go back to sleep until 2am and it was ME that had to get up with her.. then I got kicked and shoved by both aricyn and miss m until we all got out of bed at 6.30?

    I was thinking that I should go off at him for that - but then I remember he usually gets up with Aricyn every morning and leaves me to sleep in till 7.30. So I'm uh.. not going to complain..

  7. #7

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    So I shouldn't complain about the fact that DH went to bed at 9pm last night with Miss M, and then I finally got to bed around 11 after cleaning up the kitchen, making his lunch etc, then she woke up at 11.40 and didn't go back to sleep until 2am and it was ME that had to get up with her.. then I got kicked and shoved by both aricyn and miss m until we all got out of bed at 6.30?
    You can complain, that does suck! You can't complain about the regular sleep-ins though

  8. #8

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    Hun, don't give Shel a sleep in anymore. She just doesn't deserve it xoxoxo

  9. #9

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    :yeahthat:

  10. #10

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    Leasha, what does she say when you discuss this? Does she agree to do it then just huff and puff when it comes to the crunch?

    I'd also NOT be giving her a lie-in. She needs to understand that baby = less sleep for everyone and there needs to be a bit of give and take. At the moment it's all take on her part.

  11. #11

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    Oh Leash... I have no advice either!! Sorry that you cant have your sleep in. Your welcome to crash here anytime with Jazz and I will get up to her and you can sleep ALL DAY..

    Kate xox

  12. #12

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    Yeah, she doesn't need a sleep in if she sleeps all night.

  13. #13

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    I'm trying to get the same thing through DH's head.
    'I was up with a sick baby last night, you're not working today...how about you get up & let me get some sleep??? '
    Yeah right, & he wonders why I'm not inserested in the wandering hands that wake me up every single night lately! Then chucks a tanty, coz, yes, its all about him

  14. #14

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    I wouldn't be giving her a sleep in!!

  15. #15

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    Oh dear Maybe try pointing out that if you could get a bit of quality sleep then you would be a better partner as well as mummy. My DH has learnt this... and now I get at least 1 night a weeks deep proper sleep. Shell can contribute to your sleep deprivation and have an understandably psychotic partner or she can absorb a bit of the sleep loss and have a calmer partner... she can't have both. I hope I'm not out of line by saying that maybe Shell's empathy would be increased if she had the next baby? Sometimes people don't get it until they have walked in the shoes... I know my DH will probably never be a SAHD but thankfully it doesn't have to come to that for him to feel a bit of compassion for my sleep loss.

    *more hugs*

  16. #16

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    hey leash, without causing insult, i was sorta wonderig the same thing as bathsheba, that maybe she doesn't feel this responsibility as the baby is not 'hers'... oh god, that isn't meant to sound offensive, i just didn't really know how to put it.

    but basically, you need to sit shell down and remind her that you guys went into this parenting thing as a partnership, and that she needs to do some of the hard stuff too - it's not just up to you to be sleep deprived and manky. when i have been feeling this way with dp, i remind him that i am not a single parent, and that i expect some help sometimes.

    hope it all looks up and you get a decent sleep xoxo

  17. #17

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    Quote Originally Posted by Lulu View Post
    Hun, don't give Shel a sleep in anymore. She just doesn't deserve it xoxoxo
    :yeahthat:

    If she can't let you have one night of decent sleep then, honestly, she doesn't deserve to sleep in.

    If you want a night away - you're more than welcome down here with me for the night - with our without BubbaJazz

  18. #18

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    hugs hun, its tough ...

    Maybe if you try to think of it as expecting Jazz to wake up, and expecting you to have to get up to her it will be easier. Instead of expecting a sleep in YK. Change the way your thinking, not the situation

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