Funny things kids say & do

When I drive James to school in the mornings we either pretend we're a plane or a taxi. I'm usually playing pilot or taxi driver but this morning was looking in the street directory before we left home and James decided it was plane day.

I usually do the safety demonstration, including location of life raft, life jackets, seatbelts and oxygen masks. When I talk about the oxygen mask I usually say it drops down, put it on and breathe, DON'T SCREAM into it.

Today James did the safety demo and when he got to the oxygen mask he said, it will drop down and you put it on and breathe into it, it's NOT a party hat. That cracked me up.

A couple of years ago he couldn't say "delicious", everything was "malicious".

Too cute, we were just watching Thomas & it was a scary one apparently. Thomas was driving through the haunted forest & he got snow or something (I wasn't really watching) all over him so he looked white & the other trains were saying he was a ghost. Zander sat with his hands either over his eyes or on his cheeks, wide eyed, ready to cover his eyes. At the end the Fat Controller said it wasn't a ghost train it was Thomas, Zander cracked up saying "Thomas not scary, Thomas not a ghost". Hehe!

I was doing some grocery shopping the other day, and there was a couple with their young son (3-4yrs?). They where obviously shopping for a childrens party. The little boy picks up a BIG bag of grapes and piles them on the allready laden trolley. "No honey, we don't want those." says mum.
"but I like grapes!" says little one.
"We need to get things that every one likes."
"oh..." little one lookes at the trolley, "but mum! We don't like cat food!!!"

Oh I couldn't help my self! LOL!
Kids logic!!

James was watching the movie The Mummy with Brendan Fraser in it on the weekend and there was a scene where the mummy spoke in Egyptian. He calls out to me, "mummy, do you know what language the mummies speak?" I said, "no, what language do the mummies speak?", he says, "they speak Serbian." I laughed and asked what made him say that and he said because it sounds like the language two girls in his class speak, and they're Serbian....

We were having our Boxing Day at my sister's house today & we were all sitting around her loungeroom. Zander was sitting between my dad & I and he came out with this pearler

"Da, you got a baby in your tummy too?"

Poor Da!! He has decided he might need to start going back to the gym :cryinglaugh:

I have some dutch friends who had a similar one to SaraH.

Toddler was asked "What has mummy got in her tummy?"
"baby!" was the answer
"What has daddy got in his tummy?"
"Speck!!" (speck is dutch bacon, or bacon fat!)

LOL

Today we went to the shops, DH found those cups that have a second layer to them & liquid in the middle. KWIM? Well these are clear cups with orange liquid in them. DH was mucking around with them & tricked both boys several times with pretending to spill it onto them. That in itself was funny watching the boys duck each time even after DH showed them it was actually empty. But then Glenn took the cup & actually tried to drink from the cup & got rather upset when nothing would come out. Its was so funny. I was laughing so much. We ended up buying the cups, 1 each for the boys. Glenn still doesn't quite get it & its ever so funny watching him with it. Just now he was trying to empty it out in the sink!

Lots of laughs, you should all go out & buy one!

When I was about four, I got lost at the beach and some stranger took me to the Lost Children's Caravan. While I was in there, a very nice lady started reading me Peter Pan and somehow by the end of the story I had decided my name was Wendy. My name isn't Wendy, it's Fiona. So when mum & dad came to collect me they had a hell of a time convincing the lady that they were my parents because they'd come in asking for Fiona and pointed at me to which the lady told them "no, no, no, she's not your little girl ... her name's Wendy." And I was just standing there dumbstruck because I didn't want to tell the nice storytelling lady I'd lied to her but mummy was getting VERY angry with me.

Awwww so cute Wendy ;) Great thread!

I was about 6 and decided that I needed to make a bit of cash - for what I have NO idea, so I gathered up all my toys and books and put them on a blanket and took them down the street where our street met a main road, set up a sign saying TOY SALE and waited! I must have been there for about an hour (why my mum didnt miss me either I dont know - :P) and finally made a sale - a book for 20c. I packed up all my stuff soooo excited and ran home to tell mum Id made 20c on the corner street! Needless to say she was not happy and of course my sister had to bring the story up at my 21st! Nice one.

When I was about two or three I apparently managed to wander away from Mum in the supermarket, and calmly went to the service desk, and told them that they had to page my mum because she was lost. I wasn't precocious at all... really I wasn't.

Well, when I was little- don't know how old, mum said that I used to like to put things around my neck, like scarves, rope, necklaces. One day while outside with mum who was hanging out the washing, I found a beautiful long necklace...of dog poo. Apparently the dog had eaten some string and her poo came out like a lovely string of big pooey pearls. I put it proudly around my neck and showed mum. Imagine her horrified amuesment!!

Not really funny..I used to do naughty/dangerous things...i was with my parents at Agnes falls (which i think is the the strzlecki nat. park) and broke free from mums hand, and ran as fast as I could to the edge or the lookout which was fenced off by one of those pipe fences you see at footy grounds. Well aparently I jumped up and grabbed on to the fence and swung out over the gorge. There was a nice boy there who grabbed me and held me there until my parents could catch up to me.

I hope Milo is a little less adventurous!

Well, mine i don't remember personally, but it's my favourite story that mum has ever told me and i can't resist but to share!

After our car accident when i was two, i was in a coma for a bit, can't remember how long, but once i came out of the coma, i absolutely refused to eat. Mum sat by my side, everyday. She says after about two weeks, she turned around to have a conversation that was moreso about her, and not just a quick dash to the loo kind of thing, and when she turned back i had a handful of mashed pumpkin & a handful of mashed potato & i was stuffing my face like there was no tomorrow! She said she cried for about two days afterwards, she was so happy to finally see me responsive :) Only wish i had photos of white and orange mush all over my face to show off to people :P

The other one i can only vaguely remember but i know i was trying to hide from mummy in a clothes store - so off i went and crept into a corner of a change room. Now mum of course knew where i'd snuck off to, but when i came out to surprise her and she wasn't there, i got the fright of my life and tore off doing circles around this, what would then have been massive complex! Turns out she was in the change room next to me :redface:

DH will kill me if he finds out that I posted this, but it's so presious that I can't resist:
After taking a shower with his dad when he was about 4, he walked naked throught the house the whole day pulling at his penis. When my MIL asked him, what the heck he was doing, he said: "I want mine as long as daddy's"

LOL at the poo!!!

When i was about 2 we visited some friends on a farm and my sisters all had a ride on the ride on lawn mower, when it came to my turn they put me on it and i cried coz it was too noisy, and when they tried to get me off i cried even more coz i still wanted my turn.......

So they had to turn it off and my dad and mum and our friends and my sisters all pushed the ride on lawn mower so i still got a ride with no scary noise!!!!

For some reason I used to call out "Home Addition!" when we pulled in the driveway.

My sister once wrote a letter to my aunt and said she loved her so much " I am going to sell myself to you". She also used to wear ALL her underpants at the same time.....

Tanstar- I did the exact same thing with my little toys (ponies, happy meal toys, trolls) and took them to the corner of my court.. haha it was hilarious.. I didn't sell a thing! I must've been out there for ages!

There are too many things to think of when you're little. If I remember, I'll post it hehe.

According to my mum when I was 2 or 3 I used to pick snails out of the garden & eat them shells and all. Ewwwww.....