Funny things kids say & do

Ah, DD1... where do I start??
Since DD2 has come along, she has gotten herself an education in lots of things I didn't realise.
DD1 now insists on being given a 'boobie pad' (breast pad) to stuff down the front of her shirt, and 'boobie cream' (nipple cream) to rub on her belly whenever she sees me feeding the baby.
The other day, she was snuggling on the couch with DD2, when she pulled her shirt up, pressed DD2's head to her chest and said 'Come on bubbie - boobie-time!' Ah, bless her little heart. As it happened, DD2 was just deciding it was time for a feed and greedily started rooting around looking for what she wanted...

And I'm dreading the return of AF now - DD1 followed me into the toilet a couple of days after DD2 was born, caught sight of my maternity pad, and patted me on the arm saying, 'It's okay... ouch. I get a band-aid'.
I just about fell off the toilet laughing... :D

DS (2yrs) is getting into sentences now and able to express himself more.

Today he was playing matchbox cars on our dog's back.
I said "Be gentle - Zeussy doesn't like playing cars"
DS said " Yes - no hands" - Hahahahahaha!

Later on he told me that I had a 'lady' coffee and DH had a 'man' coffee. I asked what his was and he said 'baby first then lady ?!? Gotta love em.

So I am not sure really where to put this but I HAD to share it

The other day we were at the shops and my nearly 4yo DD needed to go to the toilet.....

Fast forward to her in the toilet- me controlling my other DD - when she yells at the top of her voice "Mum - why is there a Dim Sim in the toilet?"

You guessed it - someone had thrown their tampon in the toilet.
Boy did I flush the toilet fast and change the subject even faster!!
I will never be able to eat another DimSim in my life.
Kids.....

I have a couple to share - DS1 has been a crack up lately!

"Mum, every time someone asks Mrs M (his kindy teacher) a question, she scratches her bottom"

J: "Mum, why do I take this tablets again, I forget"
Me: "To help your memory and concentration" (they are fish oil tablets recommended by his paed)
J: "Oh, well they're certainly not working very well" (Ain't that the truth ;) )

Walkng from swimming lessons to the shops last week.. on the path ahead of us was a lady who was squatting down to do something, so her jeans had moved down at the back a bit too far for DS's liking. He pointed and started saying very loudly "Oh geez Mum! Oh, GROSS! Look at that! That ladies bottom is hanging out of her pants! GROSS! Oh, Yuck! That's disgusting!"

I was so embarrassed and felt so bad for the lady, but I also had to have a bit of a giggle at DS and his reaction.

The PC froze just before and DS called me over.

I told him "let's just pray, that nothing has happened to the computer" and he said "which prayer do you want me to say?"

:ROFL:

The boy has no sense of humour. He is oh so serious.

DD's version of bugger off is to wave her hand very, very crossly at me and DP and shout "BYE BYE!".

LOL!

My 8yo brothers repsonse to the dust storm...

"This is the pops clips mum... is it? Is it the pops clips?"

LMAO! Mum was thinking what the...? Pops clips? You wanna watch music videos? :rofl:

Hahahaha, seems he was talking to my 16yo brother, who was trying to scare him (:rolleyes:) by telling him it was the apocalypse!!!

LOL, pops clips :lol:

:rofl: Ah kids, don't they say the darndest things! ;)


On a side note..... sometimes pop clips feel kind of like what I imagine the apocalypse would be like... :cryinglaugh:

I'm really looking forward to having lots of these moments :) Maybe not the one I gave my mum though:

I was about 2ish, and we were out shopping. I spotted a man with a turban on his head and apparently screamed at my mum "WHY ISN'T THAT MAN IN HIS TAXI?" ... Oh dearie...

I also had a few catchphrases, the two that I've never lived down are "Beel-wheel" and "Stemmo". Beelwheel meant anything from my own name to peanut butter. Stemmo on the other hand, was something at the bank. Mum had a free day once and she was a bit curious as to what my word meant, so off we went to the bank. "Is this it?" "Noooo, it's at the other bank!" Apparently we went around to every bank in the area, me getting more upset every time that mum didn't know what a Stemmo was! We still have no idea.

yesterday at the beach, DD was petrified of the seagulls swarming us to try and get our fish and chips. Once I told her they wanted her lunch she stopped screaming and happily threw them food. Then got distressed that MORE birds arrived :doh: Then we went to leave and she was distressed about walking through the flock... until they parted as she walked through. At which point she turned around and said in the same tone her carer at creche uses "Oh! Thank you! I so proud you! Bye bye fairies. See you next time! See you soon k?" and blew them a kiss. :rofl:

:rofl: MG
Aidens thing is atm is "Bye, See ya later" everytime he leaves a room and if theres clapping and cheering on the tv he joins in and stomps his feet. Looks so cute :)

Seriously, when my son is not chucking a tanty, he is so funny.... I have a girlfriend that has a son 1 month younger than Lachlan and i could just sit and watch them play for hours with the little babbly conversations they have with each other and the great games they make up.

Today, they were chasing my friends crawling 11 mnth old around but as soon as the crawler turned around, the boys would run away cracking up laughing. such a simple thing but they get so much joy out of it.

I have also been teaching my son to tell jokes, like, 'how do you make a sausage roll?" "you push it" and "what does mummy and daddy say" "NO NO NO" but he has worked out that if you tell a funny story everyone laughs, problem is, you cant understand a word he says so he just babbles something at you and expects you to laugh.

What do your toddlers do that make you laugh???

LOL Ava is always making me laugh. Her latest thing is saying "mummy mummy mummy" until I answer her, then when I do she goes "I have a bum" pmsl :rofl:

Everytime DD watches in the night garden she cracks up especially when they go "isn't that a pip?" heheh I find that hilarious.

One of the funniest time was when we were teaching DD how to say eyes, ears, noses, mouth in english and chinese. She knows them in those languages.

Then DH, decides to teach her in viet as well, so he points to his eyes and she says it and then because nose in viet sounds very much like my name, he points to his nose and says "mui" and she points to me and goes "Moy moy moy"

we cracked up!!!!!!!!!

We've had a few tradesmen here the past couple of days and DD is a total show-off.

If she's not being paid attention she tries to grab some. First off, she pulled her pants down and started laughing. Then when the bloke was busy bending down, she went over to him to show him one of her swimmer nappies and was saying "fish, fish". Then a few minutes later she wanted to show him her Fox & Hound DVD box. Then when he started knocking on the wall to find a stud, she copied him and found the whole thing hilarious.

This makes it sound like we just let her bug the poor tradies - that all happened within a couple of minutes and then we took her out for a few hours so they could actually get some work done!

it was my little sisters first day of kindergarten and she was meeting some of the teachers, when she met a teacher who was on the bit bigger side she says : O MY YOU HAVE A BIG BUTT" needless to say my mum was embarrassed.

also when i finally picked a name for my DS Dantae got again one of mmy little sisters (5 yrs) very confused as to how my new ( married) last nime was pronunced which is BABIC. while out at the shops they say to a small group of people who asked what im going to name him they yell at the top of their lungs DANTAE KEBAB...... after we all stopped laughing i had to explain their nephews name to them again

DD1: Mummy, mummy, mummy
Me: Yes Maddie
DD1: Me got baby in me tummy.
Me: Really.
DD1: Mummy, Mummy, Mummy
Me: Yes Maddie
DD1: Joshy got baby in tummy too.
Me: Wow.
DD1: Mummy, Mummy, Mummy
Me: Yes Maddie
DD1: Daddy got baby in tummy too.
Me: That's amazing.
DD1: Mummy, Mummy, Mummy
Me: Yes Maddie
DD1: Baby got baby.

So funny! We have lots of conversations like this everyday. For some reason she is going through a phase of saying our names a few times before telling us things. Very cute.

She has also started breastfeeding her doll everytime I feed DD2 except she put the doll on her belly button - quite hilarious to watch :)

I was cursing at the vacuum cleaner today when it wasn't doing a very good job of vacuuming the carpet.

DD saw me and came back with a different vacuum cleaner head!

How come my 2yo knows how to vacuum better than me :redface:?