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I haven't read all of the replies yet, but my DS is 4 and he likes mechano sets. The ones for that age are flexible and though they need a bit of help they are great for them to learn reading instructions and putting things together and looking at a 2D picture and thinking about it in 3D. DS is pretty good now with it. I think I underestimated that kind of thing for his age.
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I love mecanno, but because the twins are the youngest kids we already have so much meccano, lego, etc that we don't really need any more. One of the problems having 4 kids :lol: