Pregnancy after Stillbirth/Recurrent Miscarriage or Late Loss March/April 2010

Hi Everyone! Thanks for thinking of me!

Everything looked good today. Baby was measuring big! Looks like baby is going to be a boy, not 100% positive yet. This is the time that we found out that Grayson was a boy though. I have my next scan on June 14th. I feel like I am going to be a nervous wreck for that one. I was already in tears on the way to this scan. One day at a time.

Charlie, good luck with your scan hun. It is going to be a long road to your 20 week scan. I hope at that point you are able to relax a tiny bit and enjoy being pregnant.

Ellie, you sound so happy! Congratulations again hun.

mo4, I hope that you are doing okay and that the bleeding has stopped. Pop in and let us know how you are.

Beata, thank you for your kind words. I hope that things are getting a tiny bit easier for you and that you are getting more sleep.

dory, how are you doing?

Hi to every one else...bbl

Laney - awesome! I am so happy for you. Ah a little mystery for you still about whether you have a pink or blue bundle! I know all too well your anxiety. I was pretty anxious too before each scan, and only realised just how much so, by the fact I had a nervous tum beforehand, and by just how much I cried and felt relieved at the end. I also get pretty anxious before every obstetrician's appointment - I have an appointment at least every two weeks, so I get some real peaks in my anxiety levels regularly! And I even like my obstetrician and the appointments are comfortable. Crazy times. 14 June seems so close! But I know for you each day probably feels like an eternity.

Mo4 - how are you doing? Thinking of you and sending you lots of love & hugs.

Cemgelles - how are you doing? You must be 6 weeks by now? I still think of you as berumda girl.... I know that's cheeky.

Charli - You might surprise yourself and get the courage up before week 30! I never thought I would actually ever do it, but finally realised I also needed to try to embrace the present and not be too scared of it. But it was pretty difficult and it took me over 6 weeks from the time I first became open to the idea to the time I actually put it into effect. When is your scan? I can't remember... Has Crumpet dropped by in here at all?

Beata - how are you and your gorgeous boy doing?

Hiya to anyone I have missed. I am feeling a little spaced out today.

Not much doing here. A friend who has going to visit today has cancelled because she is not feeling well. It's nice to be thought of, but I was looking forwawrd to cathcing up. Oh well next week... Tomorrow will be a milestone for me. I am very excited actually and not yet as nervous as I expected. I have a good feeling about this journey today..... Take care all. Be strong, one day at a time.

CharlieB - Thanks for asking, I guess I'm ok, as good as can be expected at least, and your right I did mention I had a scan today. A fetal growth and wellbeing U/S and as fair as they could see everything looked ok. She has a heart rate of 130 today and is still measuring big (by 5 days this time) and didn't like being poked by the U/S thingy, she kept kicking it back lol. Good Luck with your U/S tomorrow.

Laney - I'm glad to hear you're U/S went well, not long until your next one either.

dory - aren't the good days just extra good, I hope your enjoying that good feeling. I hope I don't offend by asking but what milestone is tomorrow? Is this baby going to be the same age as Amelia tomorrow?

As I mentioned above I had a U/S today and even though everything was fine I keep thinking it only takes one day, hell probably not even that long, for something to go wrong. One day Isabel was fine the next day she was gone, how do I know this baby is still going to be ok tomorrow? It scares me so much.

Big waves and belly rubs to everyone else.

Hi Everyone!!

So sorry I have been so MIA … we have done the big move! Thank god for mums!! MY wonderful mummy came down to help and did 99% of the cleaning and organising on the packing end! I had lots of help too from my friends in Corryong- which made it all the sadder to leave knowing I was leaving such good people!! We got a big truck and moved it all in one go which was great! And we are all settled in the new house- well as settled as we can be- I still have lots of unpacking to do- and the house is bigger- so I am going to be checking out some garage sales for some extra furniture to help fill it up!!

On the baby front- all is looking great there, I am going to the antenatal clinic at Calvary Hospital- I saw the dr today- bubs is head down but not engaged yet. I did have a little scare with a really bad case of thrush a few weeks ago- but some antibiotics helped that and all is good now. I see the midwife in two weeks for my last anti-D injection, then the Dr again two weeks after that to book in for the csection!!

As for organising things here.. I got given a MASSIVE amount of girls clothes from a friend in Corryong- we were able to do a swap as I was having a girl and her a boy – and we were both calling it quits after this. She had two girls already though- and I thought I had done well by what I gave her- until I picked up what she had for me!!! My daughter will be dressed for YEARS to come!!! I just have to sort through it all!! It’s time to wash the newborn things, and I actually bought nappies the other day!! I had been pretty much putting off all organising until the move- and well the day I go here I went into “Baby is Coming over drive!!” My cousin is coming over tomorrow to help me set up the nursery (she will be in the bassinette in our room to start with though) and to help go through all the clothes!!

I am now on the look out for a playgroup- and I have found a thread here for a monthly meet up here in Canberra that’s happening next week I think- so that should be good!!

For now I have dinner cooking and Shane is watching some playschool- so I thought I better say hi!! Sorry no chance of personals today- I will try to get back into gear soon!!

Belly rubs and hugs to all
xoxoxoxox

Hi everyone :hello:

KAM - I'm so glad the scan went well, that must have been magical seeing her kicking away! I know it sucks not being able to see into the future, but another positive scan is great news :hug:

StarBright - Happy Housewarming! Glad to hear that all is going great with bubs, not long now!

Dory - milestone day for you! Not sure exactly what it is, maybe a pregnancy PB?! Hopefully the next few months is full of more happy milestones!

Laney - yay for another great scan! I hope time races until June 14th and you can tick that one off as well.

AFM - just back from my dating scan and all good for now, little bean visible with a nice heartbeat of 150, phew! First bridge crossed, another 50 or so to go!

I've missed you all!!!! Man, how did I lose this thread?!

Laney, go you! You're cranking! 14 weeks already!

:hug: to the rest of you :) I'll be stalking more frequently now I know where you've gotten too ;)

Hey all,
just popping in to say hello, having a hard time at the moment but I am reading and following how you are all doing, xoxox

hi all, i'm popping in to to say sorry for being MIA since my last meltdown, but its been a bit crazy on the homefront. hi to all the newbies, i'm so sorry and devastated to read of your losses, but just getting to this point and conceiving again is one huge step, you'll be making your angels so proud.

i'll try and do some catch up personals in the next few days but just wanted to say
ellie, congrats on the arrival of your dd, you did it hon, both your little princesses are here, big hugs to you, i hope we all take some positivity from your successful journey
wow laney, look at your ticker fly, 14 weeks already wow you go girl,
laney, thinking of you as you reach your milestone, you are doing so well, one foot in front of the other, your getting closer to bringing that baby home.
jlk here for you if you need me, you have my number if you want to chat.
charlieb, great news on your scan and seeing little ones heartbeat, grow stronger little one.
kam, i feel your fears, nothing can tell us its going to be ok, but just do what you can to get yourself through, my mantra in my first subs pg was to not focus on the end or what can go wrong, but to do something each day to get me to the good outcome. i am just coming up to the week i lost my first and i am going to do something every day to look after myself and get this boy here, i have a massage booked and a few other things to keep me busy.
starbright, welcome back, i've missed you :), can you send your mum down to my place in a few weeks, she might come in handy lol

afm, its official we have sold our house, settling on this bubs due date (oh ohhhhhhh) and purchased a new place which is in the country on 10 acres. just hoping my ob goes with his plan of induction at 38 weeks, but wont know til 37 weeks when he's booking me in for. the new place doesn't settle til end of july so we have to crash with my parents for five weeks but thats ok, hoping mum wont mind hleping me out with the hopeful new arrival. i've calmed down a little since my last meltdown, just focusing on my next growth scan next thursday and hoping this boy has grown a bit more, people have been commenting that i've grown in the last few weeks but i can't see it, but i really hope this boy has. i've had two ctg's since i last posted and they were great, thank goodness we'll have one each week for the next few weeks. i've finally finished work and am taking this week to catch up and rest up before i tackle packing the house up for a move. anyway sorry for my babbling i'll try but just wanted to pop in and say hello and bellyrubs to all

Hi all - sorry just a really quick one for me today. Unexpected guests and a dinner party tonight I have to go get glammed up for. Ha!

My milestone yesterday ( and today) is "the furtherest ever into a pregnancy I have ever been" but I liked the pregnancy personal best (PB) too. The good days are good and they are precious because, we all know from hard experience we don't know what's around the corner, which to me makes each day evern more precious and worth celebrating.

Anyway, hopefully tomorrow I can actually get some time in to catch up. I don't like these only "me posts".

Belly rubs.

dory, what a big milestone! I hope that reaching 22+ weeks gives you a big boost of confidence. Have fun getting glammed up!

klee, thank you for your kind words. I know that you must be getting a bit nervous too as you reach the week mark that you lost little Phoebe. :hug: I feel like I am doing okay most days. Maybe even a little bit better than i did with Grayson at this time. I still find myself having more and more of "those" moments when I can't stop the tears. Shelby's angel day is a couple of days away then Grayson B-day and shortly after is Parker's angel day. All this right around the time that we will find out how this bub is growing!
I am keeping my fingers crossed that your little guy has grown nice and big for thursday!
10 acres sounds so nice! Just think of how much fun your two boys are going to have running around in the country.

jlk, you are getting really close now hun! I wish that I could tell you that the crazy lady will leave you before bub arrives. She was with me for the long haul. My high risk OB always told me that if I can get to 32 weeks with an average or above average sized bub then I will have a healthy baby in my arms.

Teagz, thanks for checking in! It is hard to believe that Jackson is 4 months already. How is everything going?

charlieB, congrats on a great first scan! One bridge at a time!

Kam, great to read that your scan went well. Measuring big is good news! I wish that there was something that I could say to help ease your fears but they really don't go away until bub is in your arms.

Starbright, it is nice to have you back! It sounds like you are having fun getting everything organized for baby. Have fun buying stuff for the house! I love garage sales! Too bad Grayson hates getting in and out of the car 100 times and getting up early.

Hi girls
Just popping in...reading but not much time for posting...following and thinking and praying for you all and your precious little ones. I've had a bit of a melt down the last few days...realisation of the 13 year journey we have travelled...and is now the ttc chapter is closed...and as my dear friend put it...I know have a princess in each hand...awwwwww that makes me cry just typing it...stay strong my friends...miracles do happen...Exxx

hi guys!~
sorry i disappeared.. i was trying hard to deal with everyhting and staying away from the net seemed to help slightly.

after 22 days of bleeding i have had 3 days with no blood!! i am so releived to go to the loo and not see blood!!!
i have my 12 week scan next thursday kinda looking forward to it but stressing about it too..


Sorry i havent got time to catch up... i hope everyone is doing well!!

Bobbie XOXO

KAM – it was so good to go back and re read that your scan went well. Hope it gives you some reassurance.

Teagz – awesome to hear from you. It's so good to see Jackson's little ticker moving forwards. Amazing to think he's 4 months old.

Starbright – you had so much to oragnise! I am so glad you have moved and are settling in. It sounds like you have your ante-natal care all sorted too. Just take care.

M04 – wow – that is such good news. I can imagine how relieved you are... I hope that your scan helps give you some more reassurance.

JLK – good to hear from you – sorry you are doing it tough. Looking forward to when you feel strong enough to post more often.

Ellie – oh sweetie – how can you not be struck by the momentousness ( is that a word?) of the birth of your darling Teyha, but whilst remembering the long hard road to have a princess for each hand. I love that little saying too. Thank you for your words of inspiration, I find they help.

Klee – congrats on your “tree change”. Impossible timing though. I am sure your mum will only be too happy to help. I hope that your scan next Thursday goes well. Have everything crossed for you. I know its hard approaching those milestones....and remembering our angels. Do you have anything planned or will you just quietly mark the day? I hope that was the last of the meltdowns for you..... keeping you in my thoughts.

Cmgelles – you've gone a bit quiet – are you ok?

Charli – oh sweetie. The BFP is the start of a a journey that is far more harrowing than the TCC journey. But the one thing that is different, is that right at this moment, you have your miracle baby growing stronger and being nutured inside you. That is truly the most amazing blessing. That's the thought to hold on to, if you can. For me at least that thought made those early days more manageable, although the fear is palpable and paralysing. But we all have to find our way through. Certainly in a pregnancy after loss, we take nothing for granted. But just as much as we are scared that history will repeat, we should also hold onto to hope that this baby will be delivered safely into our arms and be taken home to be parented. You will be anxious leading up to your scans and the milestones. Hoping the scan brings you some much deserved reassurance. I have every faith in you and your bubs.

Laney – gosh you have a lot of significant dates approaching. Do you have a plan for trying to get through them? Sending you my love.

AFM – not too much going on. Went to a funeral today. A person involved with the sporting association I have been involved in. The whole experience was weird – reminded me of the funerals of each of my angels, which then made me feel a bit guilty for thinking about myself. Then baby was moving vigorously – a first for me when I sitting up, but that was ironic. Being so happy for the movements of the life I nuture inside whilst also remembering the person who the service was for. There were some beautiful singing, which is always uplifting. I was exhausted physically from the service, and was happy to get home to my bed. Have a good weekend. Take care. Belly rubs.

:

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hi guys!~
sorry i disappeared.. i was trying hard to deal with everyhting and staying away from the net seemed to help slightly.

after 22 days of bleeding i have had 3 days with no blood!! i am so releived to go to the loo and not see blood!!!
i have my 12 week scan next thursday kinda looking forward to it but stressing about it too..


Sorry i havent got time to catch up... i hope everyone is doing well!!

Bobbie XOXO

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I was starting to worry about your disapearance! :hug:

Hi Ladies!!

KLee... :hug: for you for getting to the time in your pregnancy when Phoebe was lost.. no days are easy- but that day will be particularly hard xxooo. Good on you for planning some awesome distractions though!! Pampering is a lovely idea!!! After calling you crazy for your move- once it is all over- it hasnt been too bad- and you will be sooo happy surrounded by wide open spaces tree's and Jo will love it too!! And on the sneaky side- you get loads of help and no one lets you clean or move anything when your preg- and you will be the same having just had bubs!!

Laney... :hug:Big hugs to you too for all your sad Angel Days approaching- and Graysons Birthday too- you do deserve some congrats there though girl.. you have made it so far in the pregnancy!! Well done! I know your not through your scary times yet and you still have some ways to come- but you are doing soo well!!

jlk..... BASH< BANG##* WACK^^ SLAP>>> Thats me beating your crazy lady with a big stick.. GO AWAY CRAZY LADY!!!!! Seriously though- your journey will be hard right to the end Jo.. :hug: just keep relying on those movements and poke bubs if you need to and drink lot of cold drinks and eat lollies to make her move xoxoxoxo I am here if you need to chat xoxoxo

dory.... Another bitter sweet little wohoo to you dear- well done on making it this far- you are fast approcahing being the most pregnant you have ever been (in saying that sincere :hug: and thoughts to you as you have gone passed all theose dates where your angels grew their wings xoxox)
Im sorry you had to attend a funeral- i think its normal for anyone with a life growing inside them to feel slightly weird while trying to concentrate on death. Its kind of hard to ignore the wiggles and not think about the irony. The way i see it- is that life and death is a cycle, so to have life there must be death- the two are so intertwined- (as we all know REALLY well) When is you rnext check up or scan??

Hi to everyone else out there, breakfast time is over here, so its playtime! I will try to catch up on more personals soon xoxox

Take care everyone!!

Starbright - thankyou for your kinds words... they helped. Hoped breakfast time wasn't too chaotic. How is Shane going? Hard to believe he's not that far away from the big '2'. My niece popped around the other day and for various reasons I hadn't seen her or her kids ( my great nephew and niece) for about 8 months. Her little girl was 10 months last time I saw her and is now a cut little toddler aged 18 months. Her little boy was just as cute and talkative as ever. I imagine that Shane is just as cute as a button. How is he coping with your expanded bellly?

I have scheduled appointments with my ob every two weeks - the last one was Wednesday last week and the next one Wednesday next week 2nd June. However as I am feeling in need of reassurance, I have an appointment scheduled for tomorrow. Was hoping for today, but can manage with tomorrow. Today is my obs caesar/procedure day, so he's usually in theatre until later in the arvo. I have a friend coming to visit, and didn't want to put her off. So tommorrow it is for a variety of reasons. No more scans booked, but am going to arrange a non diagnostic scan, again for reassurance.

On a much funnier note, we took all 3 cats to the vet for their annual check up and vaccination on Saturday. OMG it was hilarious. The 3 of them all yowled at the tops of their lungs as soon as they were in the travel crates and continued for the 30 mins car trip and THEN in the waiting room whilst we waited about 15-20 mins. They scared one cat into the back of her crate, and instigated another two to start up a racket. Strangely, they were quiet during the consult, but then as soon as they were out of the consult room the racket started again and continued all the way home. When we were in the waiting room, everyone was laughing at them. My mum says better than frowning or telling us off. We got a recording of the cacaphony and will email it to some of our cat lover friends, who might understand. I told DH it was good practice for when baby is crying in the car or in public....fur babies, wouldn't b e without them....


Mo4 - how are you doing? I hope still without any more bleeding.....

Laney, Klee, JLK, - thinking of you...

Kategirl had her little boy! I just found this post!
"Today at 3:57pm, Xavier Michael was born weighing 3.45 kg. He is healthy and well. We are looking forward to a big sleep, at least that is the plan! Photo to come tomorrow."

Thinking of you and your precious Shelby today Laney xoxo My candle is burning brightly for her memory today xoxox

And congrats to Katiegirl and her DH and Anna on the safe arrival of Xavier! xoxo