Could i be pregnant at 43 ??? ...

hugs my beautiful friend!

:hug: for you

You're ace Lorelle. :hug:

i feel much of what you write, in my case, a baby now would have to be by immaculate conception, but as time goes on, bilby is about to turn three, my "chance" is slipping away too. But not the cluck factor in me, that is as strong as ever. I grieve each time i move on some of bilby's outgrown stuff, because i would much rather keep it for a sibling. but that is not going to happen.

and sunspots are suddenly appearing allover me, even though i don't spend much time in the sun, am good at covering up with sunblock, hats etc. i even wear long sleeve antiskincancer tops in summer!

Gigi ... yeh, how awful is that deep pain in your heart every time you pack away or even give away their clothes ... it's like another milestone where they are getting further & further away from 1st being a newborn then a baby then a toddler ... my watching DD become a little girl now has gone far too fast for me to the point at times i feel like i'm grieving (IYKWIM) ... i would do anything to wave a magic wand to make those feelings go away as i live with them each day. And it's the constant reminder especially when our child turns 2 onwards while everyone around us with a child the same age seems to so easily go on to have their 2nd child ... i told DP the other night how as much as i genuinely feel happy for them at the same time it slaps me in the face with my own situation & i look at my DD with a little sadness & even a little guilt that she won't have a sibling & that it will be just her playing on her own (when DP & i are not). Also DP the other night was shocked to hear my say when i hear of someone pregnant or have given birth my 1st reaction is i'm just so darn excited then within moments later how inadequate as a woman it makes me feel & i feel my body has let me down so therefore i have let the ' 3 ' of us down. I have to constantly each & every day remind myself of how incredibly lucky i am to have a child & try and get past these emotions that at times drag me down ... i just strive to get past these feelings & ENJOY all of what i have with my DD, as she simply is just so wonderful & loving & i often think how lucky was i that she got to be MY daughter ... then i feel so much better again until the next time. I can only hope it gets better & easier as times goes by :pray:

(Gigi ... go get the spots checked out at your local Doc, seriously it's so easy & the appt doesn't take long, at least it will be peace of mind for you !!)

:hug: Lorelle, you have NO idea how lucky Miss C is to have you as her Mummy :)

I'm sorry i was so hoping that this time would be the time. Yes packing away tiny clothes then slightly bigger clothes can be so heart breaking.. I remember the feeling so well with my oldest daughter and the feeling that she would'nt have a sibling to play with and I would'nt ever have another baby, boy they grow faster when you feel like that I reckon!!!!
But years later as an older mum here I find myself :p fate is an amazing thing. There is no reason to stop TTC, DH and I always thought we would continue to not use an precautions and if a baby came out of it, fantastic..

Goodluck with everyhting including that sunspot, mole thingy.. I hear you on that one as well, unfortunately to many years in the sun with tanning oil!!!!!:doh:

:comfort:

oh hun. I was so expecting number 2 for you as much as you were. You are blessed with DD, enjoy every moment of her.

xxoo

oh hun, I am so sorry to hear this. Huge :hug:.

I'm so sorry Lorelle. Your DD is extremely lucky to have you as her mum.

So sorry :( You are such an incredible woman to see the silver lining and you have made me reassess my priorities. I feel so desperate to have #4 while DH doesn't. I should count my blessings and be so very greatful for the three miracles I have. Thankyou for sharing your optimisim.

Never give up hope, it may still happen.

xxxx

:hug: Lorelle, I'm sorry it wasn't better news. Miss C is a wonderful, delightful little girl who is so lucky to have you as her Mummy.

I hope everything turns out ok with the sunspot - I probably should get checked as well :hide:

... thank you all for such thoughtful & kind words as i truely really need to hear 'em, & each of you have helped me gain my understanding again to get back on the road i was on before & accept things as they are & once again be happy about my little family just the way it is :D

... though feeling like cr@p physically as to top it off i have the period from hell to remind me of it all, & feeling faintish on & off as recently found out i have low-blood pressure which isn't helping my mood ... hope to be back to my usual smiley self very, very soon ;)

:heartbeat: Lots of love & hugs :hug: to you ALL again from me & Miss C :pigtail:

Darl, I know how it feels to feel blessed but kinda wanting to be doubly blessed. If they weren't so darned cute and perfect we wouldn't want another one but because they're so darned cute and perfect we feel like we should be grateful for what we have.

Don't feel that you have to wait until you feel all happy and blessed again before posting again, it's OK to feel a bit peeved - no matter how blessed you feel.

Lots of love

Fellow Old Fartxxxx