Pregnancy after Miscarriage or Loss May 2009

Hi everyone :p

Megsmum - because the masseuse was specialised in pg massage - we did the whole massage on one side and then swopped and then she sat me up in supported recline for the finish which was some amazing reflexology - maybe if you can find someone who specifically does pg massage in their repetoire they can give you one last bit of spoiling before we put all that behind us:lol:

WTH - how wonderful to get such a gorgeous reaction from your little one - you do wonder sometimes how they see things - I am trying to figure out at the moment how my DD will fit into our birth and what roles are appropriate (and let's face it depends on time on day/night it is all happening and how DD reacts at the time as well!!) for her and have some little contingencies and structures (notice not plans) in mind depending on how the situation unfolds...

Chappas and Pash - I remember fondly the absolute shock I got when I was in the UK around June/July hols years ago - that I could actually fly out from a remote Aboriginal community and have a sunburn two days later in London (it must have been a heatwave that year too..) - loved the long days with the sun going down so late though - a real novelty when you come from Queensland - home of the 'can't have daylight saving as it will fade the curtains' school of thought...:rolleyes:

Tam - good luck with everything sweeting - it must be getting so exciting!!! :clap:

Easha - any luck on the house and hearth yet - I am hoping seeing as we haven't heard from you in a little while that that might signal some house-moving????

Lee and Greenslw - hope all is going well!

Good health and spirits to anyone I have forgotten - back to those work loose ends I just want to fling into the bog of eternal stench at the moment

AFM - am contacting my midwife for our first 'official' meeting this week - it is all very exciting - happy the 28 bloods are done and if one more person says 'Hi - you must be due any day now... :wall:

Karen van

Sorry had a pg moment where I thought I had reached the last post and missed some! :redface:

Easha - ignore my blathering on the previous post - I am ecstatic to hear you have anchored a berth - wish you had a few more hands rushing to help make the move though - I keep looking around at the 20 yrs of teaching junk I brought home and keep having conniption (sp??) fits about where it is supposed to go!!! Better than last time - we decided to rip up three rooms of carpet (necessitating the moving of three rooms of furniture into the lounge) during what we thought was going to be a good four weeks before DD (our first) turned up but then one week after we tiled she turned up 2 weeks early :p

HannahD - wonderful to hear things are going well for you - I know the feeling about the posts - mine get eaten on a regular basis (wonder if it is a dial up things sometimes) and it is disheartening (especially when you dribble like I do) - Look forward to hearing how you are travelling!

Megsmum - getting very excited for you!!!!!

Back to the grind!
Karen van
:o)

Ok I promised I would be back and here I am.....I have a killer headache (on day 3 now) so bear with me

megsmum - Sorry you've been unwell with the flu. Glad to hear you are on the mend now though and that everything is going well.

Tam - Will be thinking of you on Wednesday. I can't believe your boy will be here in just a couple of days - it seems like only yesterday you got your BFP. But I suppose, pg'cy seems to fly by for everyone but the person whose actually pregnant...lol. Don't be too concerned about bubs' weight. As long as he is healthy and the placenta is functioning.

Easha - Congrats on finding your new home. I hope the moving. Goodluck with the move.

Meredith - I'm glad to see that upsy is active and staying put.

chappas - Glad your midwife appointment went well. I hope bub doesn't get too big.

WTH - Glad your appointment went well last friday. I had to giggle at DDs practical response. So cute! Sorry about the sciatica, I hope the massage helps.

Greenslw - Wow you have lots to celebrate atm. Happy anniversary for last week and congrats on reaching 12 weeks. DH and I also decided against screening for Downs since there's no reason to think it would come back high risk, but even if we were, we wouldn't do any further testing anyway.

Karen - You're getting the "you must be due any day now" already? I'd love to see the embarrassed look on their faces when you tell them you 'only' have 10 weeks to go.

Hi to anyone I've missed.

AFM - Had my MIL stay with us last week. I have to say it was a relief when she went home. She was telling me to hassle DH about getting the house organised. She's known him for 30 years yet it took me just a few months to work out that hassling him just makes him dig his heels in. Things may not be done in my time, but I've learnt to be patient because they do get done. Besides, we're not really making any 'plans' (Karen I like your words "contingencies and structures") until after the morphology scan, which is this Saturday. Yay! I'm really looking forward to finally seeing bubs. We did get to hear a healthy HB of 160bpm at my 16 week appointment and bubs was moving around a lot then too. It was such sweet relief to hear that sound.

I did have a slight scare last week though. Well, not really a scare, more of a concern. I had a bit of cramping friday. It was on and off most of the day but got worse that night. It wasn't very painful and there was no bleeding but it was very uncomfortable. I think I just overdid it last week because I worked a little more than usual and I did have family staying as well. But its the first real concern I've had with this pregnancy. I had a veg-out day on saturday to relax and haven't had any problems since. I know its a bit early, but do you think fatigue and stress could bring on braxton-hicks?

Sorry for the mini-essay, but I guess it has been a while.

Hi ladies, I'm sorry that this is going to be an all about me post. I am bushed and haven't got the energy for personals today :redface:

I had a scan on Friday, which went really well, and I'm finally accepting that this baby is going to be a baby. Tht is a nice feeling, with a little edge of scary that I'm trying not to think about. I alo started feeling movement ast week, which hlped a lot. And my placenta is no longer low lying (yay) and I can now DTD (hooray) and exercise(boo).

I was actully quite excitd about the exercise too and went for a swim today (part of why I'm so tired) n we've been looking for a place to live in the evenings.

Hope you're all well. :bellyrubs: Will be back later in the week for personals.

Pash - just a quickie as I've got a damm flu - go girl, you're past halfway now - and YES you do have a baby in there!! Glad you are getting movement and proof of that now!! good luck with the househunting - I used to live in Bayswater, Fulham and Bow when I loved in London (many moons ago now!)

Hi to everyone - I'm not up to writing too much - just popping in to say gidday!

All fine with me - had a scan last week and showed enormous willpower at not finding out bub's gender - I'm going for a surprise this time! Bub's looks good too, which is all that matters to me.

Lee xo

WTH thank you for your warm wishes. Glad you're spoiling yourself and baby to be. DD sounds so cute :leap: yaya on 3rd trimester not long now :D

Esha, oh enjoy your last six weeks of work what a great feeling that must be. Great you found a place too. Goodluck with hosp app.

Karen oh :hug: I'm so looking forward to my bump but I know it'd be annoying if people are saying you are bigger than you are.

Hannah wow MIL for a week you are a saint. hope you are taking it easy and so nice to hear bubs is happy and healthy.

Pash, glad to hear things are going well, yaya for feeling baby,

Lee I'm not finding out either, will power isn't the word. But it will be worth it.

ATM nervous week for me. My brain is saying oh it's fine you stop your meds the plecenta is doing all the hormone work for you now don't worry, the emotional pg lady in me is freaking out that without my progestorne and estrogen I'll MC.... OMG I'm a mess. I'm resisting calling the clinic for calming words but I am sure I'm being a worry wart for nothing. Anyways bring on week 13 I'll be calmer then.

HI ladies. Did a big post over the w/e but didn't go through.
This one might be a bit of brief catch up!

WTH - well done on telling DD! Typical child not showing much excitement but you may be right that she has already figured it all out on her own. My DS is only 2.5yrs but knows full well what a big belly and scans mean. Great that you can stop the cervix scans - one less thing to stress over!

Chappas - hope bubs doesn't hang in there too long if he/she a bit on the large side!

Megsmum - hope you are feeling much better. Great that at least baby not to big with your diabetes

Greenslw - yaay that bubba all fine on scan. Congrats on passing the magical 12weeks. Try not to stress re the progesterone support but If it really worries you maybe ask for a BT just to show your natural levels are ok

Easha - glad you have somewhere to live

Karen - yay that all going well - time is moving fast for you lately it seems!

Hannah - I am sure the cramps are nothing to stress to much over especailly if they have now stopped.
Could well be the start of BH contractions - they can start from 14weeks and are more noticeable for some than others. I have had very strong ones for months now

Pash and Lee- glad all is well with you both

AFM - gladly still plodding along. Start the steroids shots next week to mature "upsy's" l;ungs but hoping she hangs in a lot lomger and doesn't really need them
Am treating myself to a 4d scan in a few weeks. One of the non -diagnostic "fun" ones. This pg has been sooo stressful I don't think i have really allowed myself to bond with her so hoping the scan will make it seem more real.
Saw a dermatologist yesterday for the skin and hair issues. Skin is a bacterial dermatitis related to the steroids etc but should clear with treatment in a couple of mths. The hair is a sadder story - he thinks mostly caused by the MAJOR physical and emotional stress particularly earlier in this pg. My body has just freaked and dropped all the hair. Should eventually grow back but may take 1-2 yrs and quite likely never fully. I know its a silly thing to be so hing up on but I truly do look awful and the thought of being a semi-permantly bald woman is quite distressing. Not sure if I should seriously consider a wig

Megsmum - Sorry to hear you have had the flu, glad everything is going well.

Greenslw - Sounds like you had a lovely anniversary, sweet of your Dp to get you comp.

Easha - Glad you found somewhere to live, hope your last 6 weeks of work fly by

Karen - Im pleased to get past 28 week bloods too, know what you mean about people saying must be due any time now

Hannah - Sorry to hear you had a scare, it can be scary i called hospital with pains few weeks ago too worrying think its just natural to worry so much after what we have all been through.

Pash - Glad everything is going well and placenta has moved up.

Lee - Sorry to hear you have flu, hope you recover soon. Glad app went well.

Meredith - Will be nice to have 4D scan. Sorry to hear about the problems with your hair you have been through so much with this pg if you think a wig would make you feel better you should treat yourself, you deserve it.:hug:

AFM - Have finally felt brave enough to start buying for this little one. Went out with Mum and bought few things.

Just to add pain to my worry I had spots. 1 1mm bright red, then second wipe the same again :cry: this is just a pain in the but. Really, I know going off my meds would have no effect especially not within hours but the timing is so bad. I'm going to call my OB tomorrow but as it looks like what I had around week 5 I'm thinking it is unrelated spotting. Just a real pain. So distracting. I was thinking of telling my assistant at work but this has made me think otherwise. :wall: just when you think you're in the clear.

12 weeks is such an achievement but I think 16 weeks is a much better number for telling work/boss. I'm such a chicken.

Just a quick one!

Pash - really happy to hear about your placenta - mine was low lying the first time with DD and it moved up nicely (as apparently most women's do according to the research out there) well before the end of the pg which was a real relief to me...

HannahD - sorry to hear about the freaky twinges/cramps - I get some god awful ones occasionally if I have been running around too much, sit up and turn too quickly and if bub gets a good foot into my pelvic area it's a real hoot!! :lol: Now bub's lifted and moved the aching of the sciatic stuff has eased off too which is nice

Meredith - don't you dare feel bad about being worried about your hair - it is important and it is a part of yourself as a woman and a person and there is nothing wrong or superficial about being concerned about it and how it will recover in the future - scary - this little one shouldn't have had you losing your hair until she was fourteen and slamming out the door - you'll have to watch her ;) Maybe as others have suggested, taking it back to the baseline and getting a beautiful wig might be worthwhile, especially for after the birth when it is hard some days to feel comfortable in our skins as it is anyway - it would certainly give you the edge in 'easy to care for' hairstyles... If the loss has been caused by a medical situation is there anyway you might be able to access some financial support/discount for a purchase???

Greenslw - I remember when I went completely off my progesterone support I was really concerned as well - it is so hard to be completely confident sometimes in your body's ability once we have been through loss or difficulty conceiving. I think the suggestion someone (sorry, can't remember who it was without the thread in front of me) made about getting a BT/two BTs over a few weeks to see progesterone level progress might be a wonderful way of reassuring yourself about your body's capacity when it comes to this hormone and its work

HannahD - I think you and I have similar DPs in the 'heel digging if you look like I'm about to get a lecture on the state of my room' department - he promised me a veggie garden for my 40th bday and I have kept my mouth shut for months - and lo and behold - there's a bunch of wood, lots of baby star pickets and lots of sincere questions about what you look for in dirt happening in the last few weeks!!! :lol: Never said he didn't leave everything to the last minute!!!!

:redface: Man I really lied about that 'quick' thing didn't I????

Tam and Megsmum - thinking of you constantly as the day/s draw near!!!

:dance: a little on the inside
Karen van

pash - Congrats on a great scan, feeling movement and reaching 20 weeks, you're over halfway now. Goodluck with the house hunting.

Lee - Sorry you're not well. I hope that nasty flu doesn't hang around too long. I'm glad that bubs is looking good.

Greenslw - Sorry you've had some spotting. Calling your OB is a good idea just to confirm that its unrelated. And just because you've reached 12 weeks doesn't mean you have to shout it from the rooftops if you're not ready just yet :hug:

Meredith - Thanks for the info on BH contractions. I did google it and the descriptions I found seemed to fit what I had but I couldn't find anything reliable on when they are supposed to start (most sources said 3rd trimester). I'm sorry you didn't get good news re the hair loss. Don't hold off on getting a wig if it would make you feel better. After all you've been through you deserve to feel good about yourself through any means necessary :hug:

chappas - Yay for baby shopping. I'm so happy that you are feeling brave enough.

Karen - Lol at your DP and the veggie garden. Glad I'm not the only one who has had to learn that virtue of patience :lol:

AFM - So much for taking it easy this week. I've had 2 days at work without taking a break and staying back a little later than usual. Its grant application time for the clinical trials centre I work in and the senior statistician chose to have this week off (leaving me as the only statistician). So my aim for tomorrow is to get out of the office for at least 30 minutes.

Hi All,

WTH - a Pg massage sounds great. I have recently found a lady myself so plan to have a massage went I start Mat leave - can't wait

Karen Van - packing is such a nightmare - sooo much crap accumulated - fingers crossed I dont go early that's all I would need

Hannah - yay for the heart beat. How's the cramping going?? I had the same thing so hopefully nothing to worry about

Pash - poor thing having to find a place to live - dont they say moving is one of lifes biggest stressors..... and we're pregnant on top of that too

Greenslw - 3 days until 13 weeks - hang in there - bubs is fine!

Meredith - 4D scan sounds awesome - I have seen pictures and the detail the scans go into is sooo cool

Chappas - yay for shopping.... I'm with you.... haven't started yet. I am getting much 'stuff' from my sister all the big things, cot pram etc etc and then the baby shower is coming up soon too so hopefully with have most things. Must place my order for clot nappies though and buy a car seat.

AFM - well it is 4:07am at the moment and I can't sleep, this happens 2-3 times a week and generally work nights :wall::wall: I get up to pee at 2:30ish and then dont go back to sleep. I have tried spraying lavendar, watching TV and now actually getting up so my poor DH can sleep. Usually cant get comfortable from now on as the hips get sore... Isn't this the time I should be banking up my sleep for the baby.

Also had a hospital visit - alls good and heard the HB again. My hospital seems to be very open to my thoughts on the birth although I am going to be a flexible as possible. They are happy for me to have the baby in the bath if that is what I chose and there are no issues with the baby. Will have to wait and see.

Anyhow will try and go back to bed as I have to get up for work in less than 2 hours anyway

Just a quick update prior to boring meeting.

No spotting last two days, OB said wait and see :wall: but it seams to be ok.

So the rollercoster continues :D in the up today.
Personals later
:grouphug:

Hi ladies, sorry i haven't been in here for sooooo long. As you can see my pregnancy is coming along nicely. Our little miss is a monkey i think :D I honestly can't wait to meet her, im hanging to get to know her smell, her smiles, hehe and just her!!! Me and DH have a a list of names, we hope she looks like one of them ;) Ethan is getting excited and impatient to now, lol. Every night he rubs my belly and asks her to come play with him, so sweet.

On a sad note, we finally got the final autospy results for Lilli 2 wks ago. Looks like she def is a SIDS bubba, she was perfectly healthy in all other aspects. Im glad its over though, i now know she didn't suffercate from rlling on her belly, or wasn't sick. In saying that it makes me very very angry that there is no reason is to why she was then taken from me :wall: I miss her so much and sorry tears are starting again, i just want her back.

Sorry the about me post, but i promise i won't be slack anymore.
Racheal

Quickly popping in here to say "hello" and thinking of all of you!

Meredith - so sorry to read about your hair loss. I don't think it is a ridiculous thing at all to be concerned about. I think that going out and buying a top quality wig so that you like what you see in the mirror is not at all frivolous.

WTH - glad to see you progressing along!

Would love to do personals for all, but a big "hello" and sticky vibes will have to do.

Hi everyone - sorry I have been a stranger for so long - life very hectic - first it was the wedding, now in planning stages of major house renovations, and looks like I will be moving house when I am 36 weeks pregnant - what fun!

Anyway it is lovely to come on and see how everyones pregnancies are progressing.

I especially wanted to say a big hello to my fishy friend Megsmum - I cannot believe how close you are to holding your beautiful baby in your arms. Wishing you all the very best

AFM: Doing quite well besides getting a really nasty cold for last two weeks. Very happy to have gotten past the 28 week mark - I can see a light at the end of the tunnel now although still cannot help but be a worry wort! I have only three more weeks of my day job to go - yahoo. I also teach yoga in the evenings and am planning to continue that to 36 weeks if I can. Feeling quite good but lots and lots of Braxton Hicks (not painful though) which started at 25 weeks.

:grouphug: to eveyone and want to especially say a big hello to erybery, WTH, chappas, meredith, rachel (think about you and lilli often - glad you have an answer although I understand that that probably doesn't help much), hannah D (my fellow adelaideian); karen van, blueiji

Easha Glad you've found a place! At least you have a very good excuse to do very little lifting. You sound like a superwoman, that even with the lack of sleep, you can keep working and move house! Must admit, I'm not stressed at the thought of moving... yet. I think with only a moses basket and a sling as major funiture purchases, we might be able to stay in our tiny one bed apartment for a few months, if worst came to worst. I'm more stressed that our family is coming to visit and I'm not sure how we're going to accomodate 6 extra adults and 2 toddlers at the same time as a new baby :wall: Even though I'm really glad they're coming. BTW are you getting prefold cloth nappies or the flat ones?

Lee Ooh, a surprise this time? Have you started thinking about names? That's twice as many names to think about. I'd like some inspiration with some French names. I really like Gaelle but it's too close to one of my niece's names. Hope the flu's gone by the time you read this xo

Chappas I didn't notice that you were in the UK either. I'm in London, where are you? Glad you're feeling confident to buy a few things for the baby. It's fun when you let yourself, isn't it?

Meredith The 4D scan is a brilliant idea. Glad the skin will clear up, I think that will help you feel better. I'm sorry that it's not such good news about the hair. My niece had alopecia (lost all her beautiful long eyelashes and eyebrows) and all around moving house and school. But it did grow back after a couple of years. Your body's been through a much more stressful time. Do what you need to to feel comfortable with how you look. But don't forget, that no matter what, you are a beautiful person. The people who love you, won't mind that you have a little less hair.

Karen Are you on Mat leave? It's just that your posts are longer than I remember :P

Hannah First the MIL, then the cramping and then getting left holding the fort at work! Hopefully next week is easier for you. Glad the cramps stopped.

Greenslw Glad the spotting stopped. Are you going to go see the ob? 2 days and you're officially in the 3rd tri! Yay!

Rach Ethan sounds so adorable. Your monkey is lucky to be making it into such a loving family. I'm so sorry to read about Lilli. Unbelievably unfair :hug:

Babymiracles I'm looking for an antenatal yoga class! But you're in Adelaide :( Sounds like you're a busy chick!

Megsmum & WTH Hope you're both well.

AFM I wake up in the mornings, invariably having dreamt that I've lost my bubba. And then I'm on top of the world when I feel him/her moving about. I love glimpsing myself (so vain) as I pass glass doors & stuff, cos it's still such a surprise that I have a belly. And it's getting bigger. I'm about 7.5 kilos heavier than at the start of the pg, which I don't think is terrible. Nothing bothers me right now. I'm not stressed about work, not stressed about finding a place to live, not bothered that I'm the biggest (and un-fittest) I've ever been, a little stressed about all the family we'll have here at Christmas, but excited by it at the same time.

And I don't know how to explain this feeling and whether I should even say it. A friend gave birth to a gorgeous baby boy yesterday and when I saw the email, I was all grins at work. I'm so delighted for them. But a part of me still feels sad, that I'll never have that. I don't know how I can feel that when I am so obviously pg that people get up on crowded buses to give me a seat. I think I still struggle to think that that might be me one day in a hospital bed holding my newborn. Also my last one was due the exact same day as my friend's boy.

Hi all, sorry Ive been missing in action for awhile! Its great to hear how everynes travelling lately.

Babymiracles - Its great to hear from you! you sound like you have been incredibly busy, I hope you find time to rest (esp when your day job ends!)

Pash - I know exactly how you feel about your friend. I have felt that way too and think to myself (Im pregnant why shouldn't I be happier but to lose someone you love is always going to be painful. Just know you ae not alone!

Greenslw - Yay for hitting the second trimester!

HannahD - I just love seeing your ticker moving along nicely!

To everyone else - just wanted to remind you that you are the strongest women I know who are going to make the BEST mothers!!

afm - on holidays so feeling relaxed, love the thougt when I go back there is less than 1 term to go! Had my GD test on tues so will get results at ob next Weds arvo and yay for me Im now in the 3rd Trimester, its speeding by now with so much to do!