Ready to share our story of loss.....
The day of our scan at 21 weeks started off beautifully.
I had the day off and DH was to meet me in the afternoon. My Mother-in-Law and I did some shopping after lunch looking at some prams and baby furniture, and I was feeling every bit the mummy-to-be gazing at all the beautiful baby things in the stores.
My Mum and DH's Mum were coming to our scan - first grandchild (and a very long awaited one might I had!), they were very excited to be part of it. DH and I were called in first to do the nitty gritty measurements and things before showing off our bundle. We were in there for approx 3 minutes. I knew as soon as the ultrasound was turned on and my belly was up on the screen that our baby had gone.
The sonographer asked how much movement had I felt - which I replied 'heaps', and while he was doing the head circumference and leg measurements hubby was getting quite excited but I was feeling horrible. The measurements werent matching our dates. The sonographer put up the heartbeat monitor on the screen and there was nothing. My fears confirmed. DH was in shock and went out to tell our Mums.
We went home that night absolutely devastated. After four years of TTC and getting halfway through a dream pregnancy, we were shattered.
I was induced the next day at noon and Alexander was born at 11.15pm, with all of our families rallying around us right to the end. I had a few complications after the birth which now has resulted in an elective ceaser for future children but now I have recovered well. Our families have been so wonderful and I really think that it has helped us cope with all of the arrangements and things that had to be done.
We are still awaiting autopsy results which we felt were necessary in case there is something we have to do before trying again, but are feeling all in all positive. I have to say that I never dreamed this would happen to us and have been through all of the processes. We feel like a wise old couple now - our outlook on the little things has changed dramatically. We are stronger than ever and look forward to the day when we can make Alexander a big brother in heaven.
I would like to take the opportunity the thank my belly-buddies group who have been wonderful and I wish them the best of luck for September, cant wait to read their announcements.
I hope to join the TTC threads in the next few months, and hope to chat to others in similar situations.
Thanks for reading our story - it feels good to get it out.
