DD's behaviour is going backwards

Hello,

DD is 3.5 yo and on the surface seems to be the life of the party and quite fearless to most. She is very outgoing and loves to perform for any willing auidence. She is advanced in most things for her age. However she does have some funny quirks.

Her main quirk is being very ordered and routine based. Another thing she does is clears her throat alot, which is increasing alot lately.

So recently some thing has happened to our outgoing little person. She has started to revert back to needing some one with her all the time. She wants me to watch her go to the loo, to sit right next to her whilst eating, to sleep with her. She is always asking me to play with her even though she wants to control the whole play situation.

She used to be gentle with her sister now she goes off her head if DD2 interupts her play. She has reverted to pulling and pushing DD2.

She has started to have vivid dreams and wake through the night scared.

She won't go outside much in case a storm comes.

My MIL looked after her recently and she noticed that Sara was clingy too.

We have another baby due in 7 weeks. Do you think this is why her behaviour has gone weird? She did not accept DD2 very well but she was only 2 at the time. Now she is 3.5.

Or is this a common thing for 3 yos?

My DD1 is a little younger than your but when I was heavily pregnant with DD2 she definitely became more clingy and needing me with her all the time - not daddy, not nanna - just me! The less I could do, the more she wanted me. However, after DD2 arrived she went back to normal in about a week or so. My take on it was that she was worried about the unknown - ie. what would happen when the new baby arrived. Once DD2 was here the anxiety was gone.

The wanting to be in control of the play and being bossy etc unfortunately seems to be typical 3yo behaviour and quite normal for her age. All the 3 yo children (girls especially) that I know seem to be doing this so I think we just have to ride through it.

Thanks for your input Nai.

I spoke with her daycare teacher today and she agreed that Sara was not herself lately. This makes me slightly emotional atm because she just loves dc and it is the life of the party.

Here is my plan of action:

Try and talk about how she is feeling. I might try and get her to draw some faces or some thing.

Do a rewards chart for simple takes like going to the loo by herself.

Spend at least one good play session with her a day.

Read her a book about new babies and big sisters.

Apart from that I am stumped..

Harry is a little more clingy now, but more to my growing belly than me. I have even made great effort to include him in all things baby. Its not just My baby, or mine and DHs baby, its Our baby. The whole family. He does *love* the bouncing bump immensely, and gives it kisses and cuddles in a morning, and he is a little more demanding of me, but only because I have to be there for the baby to be there.

When she is born, he wll be included then too. Help mummy with nappies, get cuddles when I am feeding. Its really helped to prepare him for when she arrives because he is the kind that doesnt share mum and dad very well. Hes come up and thumped sam or lyta for giving me a cuddle.

She obviously understand there is a baby in there and coming, but it might help to sit down with her and find a nice pic of what baby would look like inside. To make sure you offer to let her feel when baby is kicking. Its also helped Harry with some basic sight words because I get him to help me read a story to the baby. Definitely worth the effort as it could help both your DD now, and both you and your DD when the baby arrives.

Inertia - I have tried to get DD to feel my belly when bub was moving but she got really freaked out about it. She did tell me that my belly looks funny though. I have tried to talk to her about being a big sister and that we'll have a new bub but she doesn't want to listen. Maybe I am putting too much emphasis on her being a big sister????

She is not overally maternal and has only recently been interested in one doll. She prefers Barbies that have pretty clothes and go on adventures!!!

Her daycare teacher has tried to talk about the baby coming too, and she said that Sara was not at all interested.