So torn!

This is going to sound completely mental, but I've been feeling so torn up about coming to the end of my pregnancy.

I mean, yes it's uncomfy, yes I'm not getting much sleep, yes I desperately would love to meet this little'un who I've bonded to so much.

But after so many years of TTC, so much IVF and knowing this will be my last pregnancy, I am also so enjoying being pg that I don't want it to end just yet!

I'm actually feeling a little melancholy everytime the little'un kicks or moves about. I know in 7 or so weeks, give or take, it'll be here for all the world to see, interact with and enjoy. Right now, it's like our little secret, DH's and mine, to lie in bed at night with DH's hand on my belly, feeling the bub move around under its dad's hands.

But it will also be a relief to know that when baby does arrive, it'll be safe and sound in our arms, perfect and wanted. It will then be as much a part of DH's life as mine.

So it's push, pull all the time, wanting April to come soon, as well as wanting it to never come! Does anyone else feel this way?

love
sushee

Sushee

I understand exactly how you feel!! The situation with my DP is far from what I would consider a stable relationship so I don't know when or if I will be pregnant again! I must admit today everything hurts and I can't walk right and I'm REALLY tired but I love having Emerson move around inside me. It's scary how much I've bonded with him already. I want to meet him so much but I can completely understand where you are coming from. It must be even bigger for you seeing as though you had such a big journey falling PG!! So you're not completely mental... unless I am aswell LOL :-k

BTW I went to aquanatal and I absolutely LOVE it!!! I go weekly now!

Lea,

I'm so glad you've replied! I was starting to think I was the only one who felt this way! Lol!

I guess I feel like it's all gone so fast. Funny, but in your first and second tris, it seems like it's taking forever, then in your last tri, it's rushing at you so quickly!

I have been slack and haven't been to aquanatal since I went on leave. :oops: I'm going to make myself go tomorrow though. I know I enjoy it and I love how it feels when I do make it there, but it's getting harder everyday to pack up and actually leave the house!

Would have been great if we lived close to each other. You could motivate me! LOLOL!

love
sushee

I was beginning to feel the same way Sushee. I want to meet my little boy soooo badly but at the same time I can't imagine this all being over... It's a bit of an internal struggle I tell you! At least you know that you're not alone! \:D/

It would be good if we lived close by hehe! I don't mind my aquanatal as I kind of get home from work, get ready and go. I hurt my foot yesterday so I'm not sure if I can go tomorrow though which will suck!! I'm hoping to go every week up until I'm due.... we'll see how that goes hehe!

Nope not alone. I look at Jonah and I LOVE him soooooooo much and I LOVE him being here but I miss him being on the inside. It was so nice to be able to feel his little kick and all of his moves, just me and him and he was with me ALL the time.

But I do look at him and I am so blessed that he is HERE with me than being on the inside and I don't get that feeling as much any more, I guess over time that feeling fades :D

Sushee

I feel the same way, but for slightly different reasons. Even though this is our first and we're planning on having others, it's the last time it'll be just her and I, IYKWIM, without having to start letting her adjust to the world.

Also, I get scared of all the things I can't control for her once she's born and how I'll go with being a Mum. I know she's nice and safe and happy and we've done a good job up until now! In case you can't tell, I'm a bit of a control freak... Guess I have a long way to go once the baby's here!

Lol! I'm very much a control freak as well! But having had three others, I also know how fast they grow up, and I think that's why I don't want it to end.

I remember bawling my eyes out the first time Ariani smiled at someone else. That was over 15 years ago and I still remember how it feels! I guess that's what I'm already grieving the loss of: the private, intimate relationship this baby and I have while I'm still carrying it in my tum.

I'm sure you'll be a great mum and will know what's best for your little girl. I think every good mum wonders if she's be okay, but trust me, with 3 older kids, I know now that you do the best you can, and you'll still be the best mum your child will ever have.

love
sushee

lately i have been focussing a lot more on the actual labour/birth part of pregnancy... but then i get emotional to think it will all be over soon! i do hope to have another one in the next few years!

i can't wait to meet our little baby, but at the same time i have really enjoyed being pregnant, i feel like the baby is protected in my belly, i love feeling her movements, and i love my partner rolling over in the middle of the night and putting his hand gently on my belly!

but.. on the other hand, i am finding it very uncomfortable to sleep or just sit on the couch in a comfy spot, and the pain caused by my pelvis stretching is really hard to deal with at times...

sush..

I remember being upset when your 7th cycle failed, and crying when this one stuck... its amazing how far and fast everything has gone!

(And im trying not to be MIA so often!) lol

So veryyyyy soon! :heartbeat: