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I would LOVE another baby close in harrisons age, maybe in about 3 years but hubby is NO NO NO, he wants to get the snip he is dead against anymore kids, I cannot for the life of me convince him otherwise, but i just want ONE more then id happily get my tubes tied myself...
Anyone been through this, what did you do, what happened in the end, did u get your way?
Oh sweet, sorry to hear this.
All I can say is that your little one is only 2 months old, not the time to be making big decisions like that! Your DH may just be feeling a little overwhelmed with all the things a new bub brings to life, give it some time and he may come around.
I know that when my DS was that age both DH and I were dead against having any more. Now DH is the one asking if we can have another, but I am not sure!
Make sure he doesn't do anything final like having the snip and give him a little time to adjust to parenthood.
Hope this helps
xxx
oh my that sounds just like em and my DH lol
and oops we have another on the way
we did plan it. but it took him till DD was about 12 months for him to say ok better do it soon so we dont get our sleep back and loose it again lol
give him some time, he is only just adjusting to the new baby..
I thought maybe give him time too but what if he goes and gets the snip.
I have PND this time around, I think thats what scares him off having anothery.
Sorry to hear about your pnd, take care of yourself.
I don't think he would be able to get the snip without you knowing, I'm fairly sure doctors do some sort of psych test before it's done to determine this is definitely what is wanted and I "think" that the wife is part of that too.
I was in exactly the same situation... DH & I had (both) decided to stop at 2...ooops.
When I fell PG with DS2 he was not happy & reacted really badly, but he got over it eventually.
I knew almost immediately that i wanted another, but he was absolutely NO about it - no room whatesoever for negotiation - and I figured, I have been blessed with three healthy children, it seemed selfish of me to push for more.
So I accepted his decision... and in the meantime my longing for another baby got so bad... in the 12 mths prior to falling PG I was dreaming about babies, and a couple of times I dreamed I was bfeeding my baby & woke up crying...I would see pG women in the supermarket & get a lump in my throat... and all the while I kept telling myself to 'get over it'.
He was going to get the snip but I never wanted him to... I always hoped he would change his mind, and I hated the idea that once he did, that was IT.
So what happened...I went off the pill for a month ... we weren't careful enough (he knew I was off the pill).
He knew I was 'late' before I did. I was stressing big time expecting him to react like he had with DS2, but he just said "I think I'll be ok this time" - he said he was older, wiser, more accepting of just going with the flow...and yeah, when the test was positive he was more excited thatn me, (it took ages for it to sink in with me.
So that's my story.... and huge :hug: to you, I so hope you can sort this out with your DH.
As far as advice goes, I don't know... I never did talk my DH into it, but life brings what it brings and I got lucky.
I do think your little one is very young & your DH probably does need time to adjust. But I fully understand your worries that he might get the snip in the meantime. FWIW I think it's a decision that really needs to be made by both of you, it affects you both and I think you need to explain to him how you feel (although I guess you already have?)
Let him know that while deciding to have another baby should be a decision made by you both...so should the decision NOT to.
Ask him at least to give it some time before making such a final move.
Oh I've just thought of one other thing - I thought my Dh was fully awware of how I felt. But after I fell PG & told people about dreaming & waking up crying, he said 'why didn't you tell me it was so bad?" - not that I think it would have made any difference in HIS case - but be sure your DH knows exactly how you feel.
HTH :hug:
Hubby was happy with just one :(...I begged to get number 2..then when we notcied his behaviour jed said no more and reluctantly I agreed to ber my tubes clamped. I woke from the surgery crying knowing straight away I had done the wrong thing but had to live with knowing I wouldnt have any more children. My heart broken when I saw pg woman on the street and was jealous and felt evil when friends fell pg :(....
I went to the doctors when I notcied a lump in my groin....I grew extremely concerned as cervical cancer runs in my family. My gp sent me for bloods and an emergency u/s and had already rung to book me in for further testing until......when I had my u/s instead of having cancer I was 8 weeks pg :o. My baby had already died and I had to process loosing them as well as having been pg with my tubes done. I fell twice more and failed to go further then 7 weeks......
And my hubby understood when I asked him if I could get my tubes reversed and try for another baby.
He knew before I knew that I was pg and was estatic when our darling Vyolett entered the world 2 weeks early, a day before fathers days.
He again said no more but he knew how much I wanted just one more...and now we have Mateauz.
I have since had my tubes removed......I still feel twinges of guilt...another baby would have been nice, another little nose to wipe and small's arms to feel wrapped around me with love...but I suppose I have to draw the line somewere......even if its hurts deep inside.
:hug: hon......