To vbac or not to vbac? that is the question...

Hi Everyone,

After meeting with my midwife for vbac discussion for the 2nd time I am having a horrific time trying to make the desicion. (Im due mid September 09)

My daughter was born via emergency c-section in 2006. She was prosterior at 10 days overdue. I was fully dialated by the 3rd hour after which she turned and I got to attempt pushing only to be told she was obsrtucted and a c-section was the only safe option (at the 12 hour mark).

I was diagnosed with manic depression post birth, had a hard time bonding with my daughter and only managed to breast-feed for 3 months - which I was very down about.

My main concerns, apart from the obvious, are:

1. I am petrified of labour - I know, it might sound silly but I remember the pain (I've been told the prosterior is worse) was horrible, I still feel sick when I think of it.

2. I am very worried about mentally preparing myself and facing my fears of labor and vbac - only to have a repeat emergency c-section and feeling like a failure afterwards - I dont want to risk the depression making a repeat appearance.

Ofcourse, there are many reasons to have a vbac - and all of them are attractive to me. I just don't know if I have the guts to do it. I'm meeting with the midwife again in 4 weeks to discuss it further (for a third time). She suggested booking a c-section in at 40 plus weeks and cancelling if I feel like trying a vbac. I personally feel like I need to make a decision and work towards it, not wing it at the end.

I would really love to hear from anyone on their vbac experiences, both successful and not - and if anybody knows of anything I can do to help me with this decision, apart from reading everything I can find.

Is there anybody else struggling with this decision?? Are their any support groups or groups of women doing this together?

Thanks in advance,
Laura xx

Hey laurab,

Just wanted to give you my support whatever your choice. I had a CS for #1 and have decided a VBAC would be my preferred option for #2 once we are pg again.

I know for you it would be a very difficult decision and I'm not able to offer any advice, but I do agree you probably want to work towards something and not change at the end.

Take your time to make your choice, though - you don't have to rush.

You can't make a wrong decision- it will be whatever is right for you at the time and trust that you'll have the strength to get through whatever outcomes that decision holds.

Sending my thoughts to you!

Calmbirth courses or something similar should help. You DO need to try and get on top of this fear no matter which way you go (of course I vote for VBAC! lol).
Why don't you have a looksee in the Calmbirth/Hypnobirth threads and see what the girls have to say

xoxoxoxo GL

Hiya Laurabee I certainly feel your pain.

I am pregnant with baby number 5 (4 pregnancies) having had every single possible labour with my children, the last being 14 months ago and a CS. I am was traumatised after the emergency CS of my last son and am petrified about a VBAC, especially considering every medical professional wants me to go straight to hospital by ambulance as soon as labour begins in case of rupture of the scar (as I am less than 2 years post CS etc and so forth) so no comfortable sitting at home for a bit nor a nice water birth for me.

My first labour was a vaginal birth with twins (with epidural, forceps, stirrups) and my second was a natural and spontaneous birth, with my third being the emergency CS. After my emergency CS I felt like a failure that I couldn't have the wonderful natural birth that I had previously, but I just focus on the fact that no matter what happened I have a healthy baby son and that I am alive to be with him.

As petrified as I am about having another CS I am going to focus on having a VBAC as best as I can with the knowledge that should something occur and I need another CS that it is not because I have failed but because the safe birth of my unborn child and my own safety is paramount. Everytime I look into the big brown eyes of my 14 month old I see that whilst the birthing experience was absolutely god awful it pales in importance to being with him.

I am a planner and hate the unknown but I am learning to embrace it as essentially birth has way too many unknown variables anyway. Babies come when they want to come and as long as they are healthy and happy that's my main concern.

If your OBGYN said that you should be able to VBAC then allow yourself to give your body the faith and recognition it deserves. You made a healthy baby last time and will do it again. Our bodies are amazing and magical (and I'm being way too philosophical here!!). Basically give yourself a big hug and let yourself off the hook...YOU DID IT GIRL! You produced a baby all by yourself (obviously post conception ;) ).

Whilst I don't suffer from depression (all of which has to be making you feel worse about yourself) I'm still frightened and I'm due on September 11 so if you want to chat further then feel free :). You are not alone by any means.

Definitely go for calmbirthing classes or hypnobirthing - will help with your fears.

Nobody can help you decide which is best for you, read lots of stories on here about VBAC's or birth stories in general, and just see what direction you get pulled in I guess.

I'm going for a VBA2C at the end of the year - and there will only be 15 or 16 months between my last c-section and this birth. My OB is very supportive of VBAC's on the sunshine coast, and is an amazing woman. I think it helps if you get good support behind you, I think it makes a difference if everyone around you thinks there is no reason why you can't do it - instead of surrounding yourself with people that give you reasons and excuses why you shouldn't go for a VBAC.

Good luck!

Hi Laurabee

:hug: to you
I am having a VBAC very soon, I have had 2 previous VBs and then an emergency CS. My choice is to VBAC this time. Yes labour can be painful...but for me personally I'd rather that than a CS :) Keep in mind too that as you did go through labour last time, your body is likely to do it differently this time - second labours can be a bit quicker & easier than first labours, (that was my experience).

Good suggestions here re hypnobirthing & calmbirthing, also there are great success stories on here! Read as much as you can, that was the best thing for me - also would have been hypnobirthing but circumstances did not allow - but reading and also these forums ;) - talking about it with people who have been there or are going through the same things is great.

I think it is a wise idea to have a plan to work towards rather than deciding at the last minute, you can still keep an open mind to try & avoid any disappointment. As we all know things don't always go to plan.. but there is nothing wrong with planning for & working towards the best possible outcome.

Good luck with your decision whichever way you go - do what is best for you, you have plenty of support here either way ;)

Hi Laurabee
Whilst I have not got to contemplating this, I learned calmbirthing to address my huge fears of childbirth and even though we ended up having an emergency caesar i found it to be wonderful in assisting with mental preparation for the birth etc.
I have replied to a couple of threads about it somewhere around here:doh:
cheerio
belinda.

I had an emergency c/s with my son, was absolutely terrified about trying again, convinced myself to go for it & ended up with another emergency c/s with my daughter. If I was given my time over again I would absolutely go for the VBAC again even knowing how it ended. It's funny, the first time I was devestated at having failed my child & my body failing me, but the second time I know I did everything possible so I felt it was just one of those things. I read & read & read some more. I armed myself with as much knowledge about birth & VBACs as I possibly could. I talked about my first birth often & to anyone that could help me get passed what i was feeling about it & about labour in general.

Still four years later I don't think I am 100% over my son's birth. I still hold a lot of guilt over things that happened & what went wrong (I too couldn't BF the first time). However I have very few regrets about my daughter's birth. The main thing I would have changed was when things were heading towards the end I was so focussed & unable to speak (I was taken in because of bleeding & they thought I was going to rupture because I couldn't explain the pain was only contractions IYKWIM).

It is a very difficult decision to make & I can understand the apprehension, because the thought of going through all of that labour & work to get to the end & have to have another c/s is not attractive at all. At the end of the day you have to ask yourself can you deal with that? Worst case scenario, you have to have another emergency c/s, will you handle it?

Hi Laurabee,

My DD was born via emergency c-section, I then fell pregnant again when she was only 5 months old with DS. I was determined to have a vbac and the hospital "supposedly" supported me on this decision (until the last minute). I ended up with another c-section :(

Anyway I am due to have baby number 3 in about 3 weeks. I am having a water HBA2C. I was scared at first about risks etc as the Drs tend to only tell you the risks and not the advantages. I did a lot of research, I also have just finished a hypnobirthing course and I now have no fears at all. I would highly recommend a hypno or calm birthing course. If you cant afford it at least try and get this book "Hypnobirthing, The Mongan Method". you can get it on fishpond.com.au for around $35.

I am more than happy to share any of my knowledge with you if you are interested.

So anyway, I definitely say go VBAC. The risk of rupture is very very minor like .05% but do your research, google and youtube are great. You need to make this decision yourself and you need to feel totally comfortable with the decision you make.

Another thing I would recommend if you go vbac is to have the support of either a doula or independant midwife or of you can't afford those a student midwife who is supportive of your decision. If you have a partner, your partner is great for support but you really also need someone who wont fold when they see you in pain and someone with experience and knowledge of vbac and childbirth.

Good luck with your decision and like I said if you want to chat or want any info I am happy to share.