Need advice/ support on work options & breastfeeding

Hi guys,

I'm in a bit of a dilemma about what to do... hoping some of you might be able to give me some advice. Anyway I have a gorgeous baby girl who is four months old and fully breastfed. At the moment she is feeding quite often during the day (2 - 3hourly) usually 6 or 7 feeds a day. I consider this a good deal as she has been sleeping about 8pm - 6am for about 8 weeks. Myself, DH and DD are all happy with how BF is going.

I have no choice but to return to work in December (I'm a nurse) - have been stressing out about it because I really dont want to, DD will only be 6.5 months old and has never accepted a bottle of EBM despite a lot of trying - we gave up in the end because it was stressing her out big time (have tried different teats etc). Finances are the only reason for me to return otherwise I would gladly resign or extend my leave.

My options are:

1. 3 x night shifts/fortnight (9pm -730am) - baby will hopefully still be sleeping the night (haha)? Obviously will be very tired - will try to do these on the nights before DH's days off so he can look after her but I can still BF but am wondering if being so tired will affect supply.

2. 4 x day shifts/fortnight(7am - 330pm) (on DH's days off) - this is my preferred option but can't think about how I can still do this and continue BF.

What do people think? Sorry this is a long post but I am worrying about it and friends/ family don't really understand, and I don't know how solids affect length between breastfeeds etc (1st baby ha ha no idea). I don't want to wean her until we are both ready.

Thanks, Pip

I went back to work when DS was 11 mnths so I completely understand why you are worried about how it is all going to work when you go back to work especially when it seems to be working so well now.

So your DD will be about 7 mnths by the time you go back to work? so if you take the day option you will be at work about 8-9 hrs including commuting to and from work? so that means if she is still feeding as often as she is now (which may not be the case but could be a possibility) that is about 2-3 feeds. So I am thinking you will be expressing when you are at work these feeds? when you get closer to Dec to start trying her on a sippy cup, a cup with a straw, or the carer might have to spoon the milk to her. I would also suggest feeding her just before you go to work so that she is topped up and be prepared to feed her as soon as you get home.

I am sure others will have some more suggestions and hope that helps :hug:

Hi,
It is very stressful to have to contemplate going back to work when your heart is telling you you need to be with your little one.
However, your breastfeeding relationship need not suffer because of this. Many women return to work and keep breastfeeding just fine. For a start, you can breastfeed as normal when you are with her. Most employers are very happy for mothers to express and in a hospital you will find they probably have facilities set aside for this. By the time you go back to work your little one will be on solids - so the pressure is off to some extent. Won't take a bottle - well, no-one said she had to. She can take her milk quite adequately out of a sippy cup, or a straw cup. Or really, take a packed lunch and bottle of water while you are away. On the other hand you will need to express so you are comfortable enough to work!
Personal anecdote - I returned to full time work when my baby was 6 weeks old and he fed til he was over 4 years old - so combining work and breastfeeding is definately achievable. If you need any other practical advice - just get back to us. You will find a wealth of experience and support on Belly Belly.

Hi my love - well done on your gorgeous girl! :hug:

I am a nurse too. I have successfully combined working with 3 of my babies. With DD14 I did nights - and I expressed overnight for comfort. She never took to a bottle of ebm but I donated my milk to a needy Mama and baby.

With DS I returned to a casual contract and I actually only did 4 hour shifts. My husband would bring him to me if he was really upset. If not I would express as I did my paper work. I really must say this was so much easier than with my oldest. He was a really settled bubby though and was hanging out for a feed when he saw me but it worked well in the end - and it was only a couple of times a week.

With DD6 I was doing some clinical supervision and I would pop home between hospitals! I also expressed when I could.

I made it work - and I made it part of my proviso for returning to work. It was have me with lactating breasts and a feeding baby or not. I know so many women who have successfully done this - especially other nurses (probably because I know a lot!!!).

I did find people to either not bat an eyelid or completley not get it... I did find some "older" women think I was whacky! I do think you need to stand firm in your decision and find the ways to make it work. It can work and it does work.
If this is your choice to continue to feed and work - then kudos to you honey - you will be glad you did I am sure... :hug:

It can be done, like the wise women here have said :) I also suggest getting in contact with your local ABA support group for when you need some IRL understanding, encouragement and support - between them all they'll know where you're at :)
Also, between now and then you will have a far better idea of where your little one's at with feeding, nights and there's time to get her used to a sippy cup. My DS wouldn't take a bottle (till we were bright enough to swap the teat! But by then it didn't matter) and took to a cup much better.
Please don't beat yourself up about needing to return to work - it's bad enough you don't want to return, and as you have to, think about nice things, like how proud your child can be of a mummy who returns to work with helping people :)

Good on you for preparing early hun. That will really help. I have twice returned to work while bfing - my first DS was 7 months so the same age as your DD will be by the sounds of it, and my second DS was 8 months. It can definitely be done, and ended up being easier than I expected. In a hospital setting it should be even easier - I know the ones around here are all very bfing friendly for staff and have rooms and flexible breaks for lactating mums.

As Barb says, I wouldn't worry at all about bottles - neither of my boys would drink from one either but they drank from a sippy cup just fine (especially when I wasn't there and they were thirsty ;) ). And at that age the bfs will probably be a bit less frequent and she can also have water and solids.

There are probably lots of pros and cons about choosing shifts. One thing to keep in mind is that babies often start waking often in the night when mum goes back to work. It seems to be that they realise that they miss the time with her during the day so they try to make up for it at night. This happened particularly with my first DS who had been sleeping through the night from 6 weeks and stopped the day I went back to work. I know now that this is reasonably common. I am not telling you this to scare you, but it might help you with making your decision.

As the time gets closer, feel free to ask for some tips on how to manage work and bfing. Preparation really helps - having a stock of EBM in the freezer before you start, and having an idea of how you will manage expressing etc all helps. I really found that the thought of going back was much harder than the reality so hopefully it will be the same for you. GL hun - you are doing a great job.

G'day guys

Have been away for a few days so haven't been able to reply. Just reading what everybody wrote has made me feel better and a bit more confident about returing to work!

Surprisingly, I don't think my hospital is very BF-friendly (you would think that it would be!!) but I'll just stick to my guns and do what I need to do. DH said that if we had to he would bring her in for a feed on my break or I could express.

Stupid question maybe but how do I go about teaching her how to use a sippy cup? I have some of the cheapies with no valve and a tommee tippee one too buthave't tried it yet.

Anyhoo thanks very much for peoples replies and advice it is very helpful.

Pip :)

Sorry forgot to add that I subscribed to the ABA the other day so that will be good too!

Good on you Pip - it sounds like you are doing a great job of preparing. I am sure you will find the ABA a great source of support.

I found my boys just taught themselves how to drink from the cup - DS1 got it the first time, DS2 took a few tries but got there. I would give that a try first, and if it doesn't work some mums find that it can help to put a damp face cloth over the spout to help the little ones learn how to suck the spout to get the drink out.

You seem to have things well organised already. Good on you hun.

Pip - I have just gone back to work and still BF DD. She has never taken a bottle (or dummy :rolleyes:) but will drink from a sippy cup. The Heinz basics 4m+ one was fine to begin with. That is how she has EBM now. I have gone back on x2 8h 12-2030hrs shifts per week and soon x3. For me that is the FT number of days I do (normally 12 hour shifts) but I will stay reduced hours for a while yet. I express once through the shift and often combine my 2 breaks together so I can express and still get to eat. You are entitled to breaks for expressing. Check your HR policy.

It isn't too bad - DD punishes me when I get home and the nipple is never far from her for the next 24 hours :lol: but we are still fully BF and will continue to be so until she self weans. The introduction of solids helps and, often, they will hang out waiting for you to come home to feed ;)

I was the same. None of my babies were happy with a bottle... None of them would have it. But a cup worked. I can't tell you which one I used. But Michelle has some wonderful advice there. (just want to say you rock Michelle for juggling what you do - Lily is a lucky baby - :hug:)

Good luck my love - this will work out. :hug:

Aw shucks :redface: Thanks Deb :hug:

Hi everyone, thought I would update you as I like to hear how other peoples situations ended up.....

Firstly I couldn't believe my eyes when I read what I had written 3.5 months ago that Sarah was sleeping 8pm - 6am! That went right out the window and she is now up many times per night but that is a whole other story...

Anyway I discovered that I had a few weeks of annual leave up my sleeve and didn't start back till just after Christmas. It has been fine actually, apart from being majorly sleep deprived, I have been expressing twice at work and had a stockpile of EBM in our freezer which I had building up over the last couple of months. DD suddenly started taking the bottle off DH after a long break of not trying but isn't interested in solids at all. I'm doing the early shifts too, 7am - 230pm at the moment.

So again thanks everyone and what was I worrying about????? Haha :)

by the way she is using one of the cheap plastic sippy cup for water now, the expensive ones with the valve just don't make sense to her, and she takes sips out of a glass too :)

Awesome news!!

That's great news Pip (except about the sleeping ;) ).