I am not a comfort item

Okay, this is driving me mad. Our darling little boy will not sleep if I put him down in his cot (day or night) or on the floor in the lounge where he would generally nap during the day. He falls asleep eventually in the car, but even on a 40 minute car trip, he could be awake when we arrive, even if he is due for a sleep or will have only slept for a few minutes during the drive.

At night, he goes to sleep on the boob (he does during the day too, its all I can do for peace, and try to do things with one hand, like now- typing), and no matter how long I do or don't wait, he wakes as soon as I put him in his cot for the night. Have tried even warming the bed before putting him down.

If I do manage to get him down asleep anywhere, he's awake within 10 minutes, usually under 5. This makes it impossible for me to do anything. And I'm not just talking about housework. I can't even eat or go to the loo. And I get really agro if I don't eat properly, and then a migraine. Yay.

I'm not sure if he's teething, I would guess so, even though this behaviour has been going on for quite a while. He has two teeth which he got on the same day a few weeks ago. Panadol or bonjela don't seem to do a lot. He just wants me to hold him all the time. It takes ages for anyone else to get him to settle down once he wakes up and starts crying (the Man had a go the other night). He often wakes up with a real start and then cries a lot.

So for the last two nights he's gone to bed with me straight away, every other night for the last goodness knows how many weeks, I take him out of the cot (which is within arm's reach of me laying in bed, since others in the house will not make a move to renovate and make ready a caravan and switch rooms for the Boy so Ryan can be out of our room) and feed him in bed. We go to sleep like that and he feeds (or rather comforts) as he pleases all night. He will not take a dummy, and I don't have the energy to try and site up in the lounge and feed him then try and get him back into the cot, as I can't get a nap during the day, so would be further exhausted. He doesn't really seem hungry, so shouldn't need night feeds, but I can't even top him up with a bottle as he just won't have it! Is he just going to be my sooky little boy?

Urgh! Sorry, had to vent, and also ask if anyone had any ideas! Please!

Hi, sorry I dont have any ideas but just wanted to sympathise with you as I am also a human dummy! My little boy also wouldnt take a dummy, is fed to sleep and snacks during the night. I read books and tried (not too hard though) to change this but in the end I realised it actually isnt such a bad thing. We cosleep so I am never up during the night and if he wakes up I pull him on the boob and we are both back to sleep within 10 minutes. After speaking to alot of people who have done the opposite of this i have realised that they have had alot more stressful and sleepless nights than I have, once I accepted that this is just the way he likes to sleep I have found life to be quite easy, we both have plenty of sleep at night and he goes down for his daytime nap guaranteed same time every day on the boob. I just decided it wasnt worth the battle trying to change it and have spoken to people who did similar and they all say they grow out of it eventually. Although I only have one child which makes is easier don't know if I could be a human dummy for number 2.

Thanks Mezzz. That does make me feel better. :)

:hug: Oh hun! Its so tough isnt it! I was going to reply earlier but had a 2 yr old who is the king wanting my attention.

Do you have a sling?? It was my life savior when Ds was tiny! I could get stuff done and he would be happy! It could be a wonder week too? not sure when they are but its nice to give it a name lol!

It will pass hun and you will look back and wish he was tiny again! But vent away it wil make you feel better!

Good luck xxx

Thanks for managing to come on Boomba. Forget wonder week, I think its the mighty months! :lol: I had a sling, I'll have to see if I can find it. That's a good idea.

I am enjoying all the close time though. I will admit that I love that.

your welcome hun! Hope you get some rest soon and bubs sleeps more for you. My Ds was never a big sleeper it drove me insane! Wanted to be the life of the party lol! And still does :)

:hug: xx

OMG Netix I could have written your post!

You sound like you are completely *over* the situation! The interesting thing is, he will not be your sooky little baby - I will bet my bottom dollar that he will be Mr Personality plus - confident and outgoing by the time he reaches school. (I've done the research - my velcro baby is now 16) Your little guy is a completely perfectly adapted human baby. It's normal. (doesn't always fit well with life in Australia in the 21st century.)
The first thing to do is - look after yourself. Eat! Even if he has to have a sook on the floor. This will give you the energy to cope and to plan. Low blood sugars and high needs parenting are difficult combination.
As the others said - get your baby sling into gear - no mother should leave hospital without one. You can get stuff done around the house - he will sleep blissfully, stir, know his mother is there and sleep again.
My next book - on baby settling- will reveal the best kept secret in the babycare business - the quickest way to get a baby to sleep is to feed it to sleep. I don't know what Gina Ford, the Supernanny and the galaxy of Australian "babywhispers" who I won't even give oxygen to on these pages are thinking. It's normal. All this separating feeding from sleep, it's naughty to feed to sleep or sleep with your baby - puhleeze! It's normal. so much angst could be removed from mothers' lives if they didn't have the guilt of "thinking they were doing the wrong thing" by feeding.
The nights are tougher on us with a wakeful baby, so the temptation is to start their first. But, interestingly, most people find that when they get more sleep at during the day, they get more sleep at night.
Has anyone clued you in on what sleep cues to look for? Even at this age, if baby has been awake for 1.5-2hrs, he is ready for sleep again. May be grizzling, rubbing eyes, "crack it" - furrowed brow. A quick feed with usually get baby to sleep at this time. In a sling, he will stay asleep - once he is getting some good daytime naps, night-time will become easier.
And, always feel free to talk to your friends here on Belly Belly - some-times you just need to vent - it's a hard gig.

Sending you :hug: hun.
Hope it gets sorted for you soon.
xxx

Heaven, I hope I didn't duplicate one of your posts! ;)

Barb; Velcro baby... LOL! I like that one. I'm not too worried if he's my sooky little boy atm, it definately makes me feel needed when Miss Independent doesn't need help with anything, as they do when they're two. I was beginning to try to talk myself into maybe needing medication (I was afraid to ask for anything to calm my anger, as I am worried about trying to get the medication 'right' as I have heard can play havoc with you mentally), until I realised that my agro was all because I wasn't eating properly. Time just seems to get away from me, but when I realise or remember that I haven't eaten, I do the right thing.
I must admit I have really felt better about having him in bed with me (not that I thought there was anything wring with it, just the lack of time for the Man and I), and am happy to hear that others feed their bub to sleep. I knew they did, I think I just needed to hear it.
I don't quite get what you mean about the nights are tougher paragraph. Maybe its time for me to be asleep now?
I forget the cues, always. Sometimes I will catch a glazey look, and think 'oh dear, he's tired, quick, feed to sleep' or something like that.

Thank you Sunshine.

I have managed to put him to bed just now (fed to sleep again after I tried to put him in the cot after being fed to sleep but he woke up quickly) in a cat bag... Its a faux lambskin lined slightly padded open ended 'envelope' that is made for a cat. I don't know what else to call it but a cat bag. The Man was given it at BigW when they were handing them out, and Ryan seems to like it in there. At least he stays at the same temperature from when I hold him to when I put him down. I did it yesterday too, but something woke him shortly thereafter.