New and very very confuzzled :/

I'm 11w5d - I had an ultrasound at 5w4d because I went to the hospital with cramps thinking I was miscarrying. They determined that I wasn't but since I was getting the pain all on one side they had me do an ultrasound to make sure it wasn't ectopic. Again, I wasn't, we even got to see the heartbeat!

I've decided to call the pregnancy helpline. I have a list of questions - could you girls check over it and see if there's anything else I should ask? I feel like I know everything about *other women's* pregnancies but not my own!

1. How do I make the GP take me a bit more seriously and start actually caring for me?
2. How do I go about finding the person who helps me through the pregnancy? Some people have told me I need an obstetrician, but some have said I only need a midwife and obstetricians are just for private patients. I'm going public and don't want to waste time/money finding an ob if there's no point.
3. I?d like to have a doula with me. How do I find one I want?
4. Am I meant to make my own appointments with the hospital?
5. How do I do this?
6. How am I meant to know when to make them for?
7. Which hospital is best for me? (Choices are: RWH, Mercy, and the Northern in Melbourne)

You'd think there'd be more help, especially for first time mothers! What if I didn't have the internet and had no-one to talk to? I'm still confused!

If you want to answer my questions yourself, feel free to do so - may as well get a few opinions!

First of all, congratulations on being pregnant! :clap:

I'll see how well I can answer your questions for you...it can definitely be a confusing time and sometimes it feels like all the doctors etc you see are too busy to really talk to you, or just assume that you automatically know what to do. Can be very frustrating! :shakehead:


1. How do I make the GP take me a bit more seriously and start actually caring for me?

To be honest, if my GP wasn't taking me seriously, I'd probably find another. That being said, how is it that he/she is not taking you seriously? I'm gathering this is your first, and they may be almost dismissing your many questions and concerns more than you'd like? I have found from talking to friends etc, that some GP's are fairly sparse with their care until you get over say 3 months - they tell them to take folate, eat well, don't over-do it and come back in x-amount of time for another check-up, and that's about it. Once they hit that 3-month mark, the GP's are usually a bit more 'into it', I guess.

I guess it depends if you know your GP well, if you feel that you can talk to them freely and openly, and if you feel comfortable with their judgement/knowledge/care for the next 8 months. Only you can really answer that one.

2. How do I go about finding the person who helps me through the pregnancy? Some people have told me I need an obstetrician, but some have said I only need a midwife and obstetricians are just for private patients. I'm going public and don't want to waste time/money finding an ob if there's no point.

If you going public, you will have an OB assigned to you by the hospital (or, more than likely, a head OB assigned to you along with his team of resident OB's who do most of the appointments) Are you doing shared care, or full-hospital care? You have a choice...shared care is shared between your GP and the hospital, full-hospital care is just that (bit of a pain if you live a decent distance from the hospital, but if you're not finding the GP helpful, might be worth looking at) I am on shared care - I have had 3 hospital appointments - the first was with 2 midwives, this was the longest - we went into detail about everything - any fears, previous experiences, questions, health concerns etc. They get a full run-down from you. The other 2 appointments were with a resident OB, who just did a general check up and asked if I had any concerns etc. I have another scheduled at 41 weeks to discuss getting this baby out of me if he hasn't come by himself :doh:

3. I?d like to have a doula with me. How do I find one I want?

There are some great threads in here regarding Doulas and the best ones around...I'm sure there are some lovely ladies that would be willing to help you. I think there is a whole section for it? There are quite a few Doula's on the forum, too. You could also consider looking for a student Doula - they offer their services free of charge, as your birth helps them to gain their qualifications.

4. Am I meant to make my own appointments with the hospital?

Your GP should - at one of your next appointments - either send a letter to your chosen hospital, or give you a letter for your appointment. In the case of the first, the hospital will write to you with an appointment time. In the second case, you ring them and arrange an appointment. My first hospital appointment wasn't scheduled in until I was 24 weeks, though, so you might be awhile off yet. But hospitals - particularly in bigger cities, do need to be told a fair bit in advance. (I am in QLD, so keep in mind they might do things differently in your state)

6. How am I meant to know when to make them for?

As I said, first one is probably going to be @ or around the 24 week mark, and then they will automatically schedule them in for you at the end of each appointment from there. As for GP appointments, you see them every month, then when you get to...I can't remember! LOL I think it's 26/28 weeks? you go to every fortnight, then once you hit....36 weeks? it's weekly. How terrible...I don't even remember! I'm sure someone else will be able to tell you for sure, tho.

7. Which hospital is best for me? (Choices are: RWH, Mercy, and the Northern in Melbourne)

I will leave this one, as I have no idea ;)

Hope that helps a little! Try to relax as best you can and enjoy it! ;)

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...how is it that he/she is not taking you seriously? I'm gathering this is your first, and they may be almost dismissing your many questions and concerns more than you'd like? I have found from talking to friends etc, that some GP's are fairly sparse with their care until you get over say 3 months - they tell them to take folate, eat well, don't over-do it and come back in x-amount of time for another check-up, and that's about it....

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Yeah, that's pretty much what happened, only he didn't tell me to come back at all! I had to ask the blood tech when my results would be in, and even when I went in for them all they said was "everything looks fine so far"

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I guess it depends if you know your GP well...

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I don't - I use a clinic rather than one doctor every time. I'd like to just use one, but no matter when I go in, the doctor I want to see isn't there, or I forget his name and end up just saying "uhhh... Um...oh, I can't remember, whoever'll see me..."

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Are you doing shared care, or full-hospital care?

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I was going to go shared care because that seems to be the "norm", but I reckon full hospital will probably suit me better now... It sounds weird but I feel better cared for when I go to the ER than my GP...

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You could also consider looking for a student Doula - they offer their services free of charge, as your birth helps them to gain their qualifications.

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Oooh, I'd read some of the forum posts (after I posted this thread) and had sorta started thinking maybe I couldn't afford it... But if students are cheaper/free, maybe I should start down that avenue? I'll have my DH and possibly my mum (who acted as "unofficial doula" for my cousin) around too, so it won't matter as much if they're a bit unexperienced...

Thanks soooo much! Maybe I don't need to call the hotline, I think after trying a few forums this may be the one I've been looking for :D

Hi TeniBear! Welcome to Belly Belly. If you want lots of good information on pregnancy and birth, you're definitely in the right place. :) Have a read through some of the articles on pregnancy posted here for more pointers. https://www.bellybelly.com.au/pregnancy
All the best!

Oops! Double post.

Congrats on your pregnancy :)

1. How do I make the GP take me a bit more seriously and start actually caring for me?

Im with the others, if you do not feel comfortable around this GP then time to find one you like. Theres nothing wrong with trying out new GP's until you find the right one.

2.How do I go about finding the person who helps me through the pregnancy? Some people have told me I need an obstetrician, but some have said I only need a midwife and obstetricians are just for private patients. I'm going public and don't want to waste time/money finding an ob if there's no point.
I went public share cared for my other 2 preg. I saw my GP for all app and had the odd app at the hospital then just went to the hospital when i had bubs or any problems :)


3.I'd like to have a doula with me. How do I find one I want?
Look up a few sites for finding doulas -

Find a Doula
If your after a training doula - Student Doula's
Or look at the doula section in this forum :)

Am I meant to make my own appointments with the hospital? Your doc should have explained this but noramally they will send your referal through and the hospital will contact you with a letter about your first app with them, in the mean tome you see your GP every 4wks at this stage

How am I meant to know when to make them for? Your GP needs to be able to tell you how it all works (sounds like you def need a new gp)

Which hospital is best for me? (Choices are: RWH, Mercy, and the Northern in Melbourne) Unsure dont live in melbourne sorry i couldnt help.

Well, the others have addressed your other questions nicely, so I'll stick to the last one. In order of preference, I would say Mercy first, RWH and the Northern very much last (in fact I wouldn't even consider this one). Private won't be an option for you now, they will all be booked out at this stage. But it sounds as though you've decided on public anyway :).

Both Mercy and RWH are pretty new hospitals, but the Mercy is bigger. RWH definitely has space issues, and is likely to boot you out to a satellite hospital, like the Northern. Mind you, last I heard, there wasn't alot of choice to be had. You are assigned to a hospital by your postcode, and can't get around that. It used not to be the case, but seems to have changed recently. Your GP should be able to help you, but if not just ring the hospitals and find out for yourself. Good luck :)

hi tenibear, congrats on your PG! :dance:

as janie said, the other girls have covered your questions pretty well so i just wanted to add that i went public & it was my first.i didn't bother with shared care & just went to the hospital & this worked well for me. also, i have to say that until i had an appointment with the hospital at around 16 weeks, i felt completely in the dark with regards to what was going on, even with a good GP! i relied on BB & books/the internet for info!! even after my appts, i still made the forum my first point of call because i found my appts were over in 5 minutes (although be prepared for a long wait till you get your 5 minutes :lol:)

Hi TeniBear!

Congratulations on your pregnancy! It can be a very confusing time. Everyone seems to have answered your questions well, but I thought I would just agree with Janie about which hospital. It all depends on where you live and by the sounds of it you are in my area. But it does go by your postcode and if you fall in to only the Northern catchment area you are stuck with it! So if you can get yourself in at the Mercy make this your choice!!

And also, BB is one of the best resources around! Here you get personal experience from so many others - something you can't get from your doctors or books. It allows you to explore all the options that are available at every step and make the choice that is right for you. And this is the most important thing! You have to be comfortable with the decisions you make!