Elective Caesarean & Family

I was just reading another thread & it got me thinking about family & elective caesarean's. My first two children were emergency caesareans & by the time they were born a lot of the family were at the hospital waiting. It was lovely to have them there but I am thinking that if I go for an elective caesarean next I might do things differently. I wonder what other people do?

Did you tell people the date of the caesarean? If you did, did you tell them the time? Were people there to see that baby straight away?

I'm thinking that I might like to tell people once the baby is born, so I can introduce the baby to the world. Our third will be our last more than likely & I would like to see everyone's reactions when they first meet my baby for once. I missed that the other two times because I was in recovery & my husband took the baby away with the nurses for their checks & everything, so family got to meet them then.

Does that sound selfish?

Nope, not selfish. You don't have to tell them anything.

If you have a date booked for the c/sect, why don't you tell them it's three days later? I don't think that's mean and what a lovely suprise to get an unexpected phone call to say baby is here!

I only told my parents and inlaws, but specifically asked them not to come that evening, and to wait till the next day. They were cool with that, and especially as my sect was booked for late afternoon, it was difficult for them to fit in with hospital visiting times.

I dont think there is anything wrong with keeping it vague, there needs to be some kind of surprise with a planed section I personally think. And you it is so much better to face everyone on your own terms. Good luck with it.

With my DD I told everyone the date of our CS, my parents and MIL waited at the hospital with me and DH until I went in then they were asked (by me) to wait in the cafe until DH went to get them (or call them on their mobile) and bring them up. They had strict instructions that no-one other than DH was to see baby until I returned from recovery and was able to bond with and breastfeed baby, I too wanted to introduce her with DH as a family. It turns out that my baby was in distress at birth and needed to go to NICU so it never mattered in the end. This time around if I end up having a CS I will be happy to tell everyone the date but the same rules stand.

DS was an emergency c-section and this one is an elective. My family and close friends know the date but only my mum will coming to visit after with DS. I have not told her a time, said that I did not know, it was whenever I got in and we would call when we were ready for her. Everyone else I have said can come the next day in the afternoon after I have had a shower and the catheter has been removed. I would like to be half descent before visiting people :pray:

No, not selfish at all. My DD was an emergency c/s. There was 8 hours between her birth and my MIL and ALL her family visiting. I was so dopey from the GA, and so hugely overwhelmed that DH and I decided with DS that we would ban everyone from visiting on the first day.
We knew for months and months beforehand the date of DS arrival, but didn't tell the IL's. Think we may have told them in the last trimester? Then DH dropped the bomb that we weren't having visitors the first day. MIL wasn't impressed, but I wasn't having her get in the way of my first memories this time round.

We told her that we wanted time as a family first. for DD to have some time with her new sibling without everyone hovering around.

Do you know what the visiting hours are? We were lucky that visiting hours started at something like 3pm. So I didn't have to see them for a whole day and a half...was pure bliss!

I had a morning C-Sect booked and had told everyone that no one was allowed to visit until after our other child had met the baby first. I don't know what everyone thought about this (didn't ask them). DH is the one to give instructions to - there is no way nurses/midwives can take the baby to meet anyone without the parent's permission, so as long as you both have the same plan, you'll be ok.

I actually ended up going into labour the day before anyway so best laid plans and all that........

nope thats not selfish at all.. If they ask what date the cs is just say a day later then you have been booked in.. and then if they ask why you had it the day before just say you went for an appointment and they decided to do you that day due to various reasons lol.

Whoever is looking after your other children would need to know of course..

Not selfish at all! We announced our bubs arrival by elective c-section after the fact, just the same as we would a natural birth. Told only our parents beforehand and said we'd let them know when we were ready for them to visit. It'd upset me no end if everyone else got to have a cuddle before we'd had our first breastfeed.

I'm with Traceyvon.. don't want any visitors until I've had the chance to get out of bed and have a shower.

I had an elective c-section and although our families knew we were having a c-section (DS was breech) we didn't tell them the date. I had a HUGE fight with my mother over it because she wanted to be able to organise her life around it :rolleyes: but apart from that, everyone was fine. I loved ringing people and saying we'd had him and it was such a surprise for them. We were able to have time alone with our boy which was so special, and I was quite ill after it for a few hours (reaction to the epidural) so it was so nice not having people in my room to watch me retch and nearly pass out (tmi I know, but it's true!). It's definiately not a selfish thing - you will never get those moments back so enjoy them!