Am I jinxed with pregnancies?

Hi I'm Tunz & new to BB. My husband & I have been going thru ivf for the last 4 years. I finally got pregnant last year and at 7 weeks had a miscarriage. I was then pregnant in Feb' 09 with twins and at my 12 week scan discovered one of the twins had down syndrome and severe heart problems. After a selective termination of that twin, at 20 weeks I suddenly gave birth to my other twin, my still born son we named Thomas. I am currently 12 weeks pregnant and my scan on Tuesday showed the baby's brain had no brain tissue and so will need to have another termination. I can't help but thinking I am jinxed as everytime I am pregnant something goes wrong. I can never be excited about being pregnant & am just so scared. If anyone has any advice I would love to hear from you.

My advice is to take a step at a time and really educate yourself.

I am sure your specialist has done tests to see how your folate levels are - that's important if it hasn't been done. As I said in the other post - you need to be on an increased doseage for at least 3 months prior to conceiving agina.

Once you have conceived it is a day at a time. I decided to enjoy as much as I could every day. For as long as my baby was with me (however long that was to be) I wanted her/him to feel the love. I understand the fear and anxiety. I felt that every day. However, somehow you make it through.

I know that's not the answer that sounds great - but it's what I did.

Take your time - what is happening now? Are you booked in for a D & C? I just wish I could take this pain away. Sending you my love :hug:

The fetal specialist will confirm tommorrow what the ultrasound and dr have already told us. I was hoping to have the d&c this week but unfortunately the hospital want me to see their specialist prior to this. Yeah one day at a time is a nightmare, I can't sleep or eat at the mo & just wish this pain would all go away. Thanks so much for talking to me about this. Its reallly hard when all your friends seem to have normal/no risk pregnancies and have a healthy baby at the end of it. I know it will get easier, I just wish I knew why this was happening but I guess I never will.

Tunz -my heart just aches for you and your husband, and I too wish I could take away your pain. I can't give you an answer to your question.

I understand your fear and your question.

I am also in awe of your courage when in the past you made the decision to try again.

Don't underestimate the courage it took for you to do that and hopefully that strength of character will help you through these really tough times.

Apart from the medical investigations,suggested by Inanna, I would recommend that you seek some supportive counseling to help you manage your grief. But if you were going through IVF you were probably offered counseling by the clinic. I was a cynic of counseling until I found an amazing counselor who I connected with and who made me feel safe. To have such a wonderful space to talk about me, my experiences and my fears and hopes and dreams has been, truly a godsend. I hope it works for others too, because I can't magic away your pain.

Know there are kindred souls out here who want the best for you, even those just reading the forums, and who shed a silent tear for you and your babies.

:comfort: i feels that way doesn't it :comfort:

I am guessing this last pg the baby is anecephalic ?? my Katy had anencephaly :hug: if you want someone who has made the heartbreaking decision due to anencephaly to talk to feel free to email me on harrydog@internode.on.net