18 month old - want to gently wean - advice?

hi all

DS is 18 months and when we was about 16 months old he seemed to be dropping off on the feeding - he was down to one a day, sometimes even missing a day.

then something happened and he upped his BFs. now he has a feed before and after each bedtime (at night and one nap in the day). to me it sounds like he needs the comfort but no matter how i try to just cuddle and comfort, he wants a BF.

i've always let DS take the lead with food, BFing and sleeps but i'm worried that he's not going to stop on his own. i really don't want to be BFing him for too much longer as i'd like to have a second bub and would prefer to give my body some time to fully replenish after BFing and before i fall pregnant.

any advice or ideas welcome.

TIA :D

no advice, just posting to see what people say. My DD is 15 months and doesnt show any sign of weaning any time soon, but im not having AF and want to start trying for another late next year...recon if i stop BF it might come back.

Hun, the decision to wean is between you and your DS, so I'm reluctant to give too much in the way of advice. The one thing that springs to mind from your post though, is the comment about replenishing your body before TTC again. My experience, and that of many mums I know, is that it is parenting that wears us out, not bfing. My DS1 weaned while I was pg with DS2 and I was every bit as tired post-weaning as before! While bfing our bodies actually use nutrients more efficiently. That doesn't mean that you shouldn't wean if you want to, I guess I'm just letting you know that you might not feel a sudden surge of energy in case you're expecting it ;)

If you do decide to wean, it is usually recommended that you drop one feed at a time about a week apart, so that you reduce your risk of mastitis. If your DS goes with the flow, it shouldn't be too difficult. He might have other ideas though and this is where it can be harder. There are a variety of strategies that work well for mums some of the time. At that age our children generally understand things that are said to them, so you can start by explaining that he is too big for your milk now. Some mums start to limit the feeds - either by saying only x feeds today, or by the length of each feed eg only 10 sucks - this helps with learning to count too! Hopefully one of these ideas, or a variation of them, will work for you too. If not, let us know and we'll think of some more!

Best of luck with your decision hun. It's not an easy one - often weaning at any age is somewhat bittersweet. And if you do decide to let him choose his own time, it will happen.

Honestly, they all wean!
No-one breastfeeds into highschool.
Mostly, mothers who breastfeed the longest have the most kids. We are designed to breastfeed, and for that reason, breastfeeding is *easy* on our bodies. It actually doesn't *take it out of us* - that's western mythology. Your body is alreay replenishing as your baby takes less feeds- to be honest, if you eat well, as most mothers in the west do, you don't need to replenish - you do that naturally.- your body is more efficient in taking up nutrients from the food you are eating. Many women go from breastfeeding to pregnancy wihout missing a beat - no period, and baby weans as the placental hormones dampen down lactation.
You have breastfed long and well, so wean if you want, but don't worry that if you don't you will never wean, or that you have to wean to get pregnant

thanks for all the advice.

manta and barb - i know many women successfully BF while pregnant and beyond. i just really wanted to give my body some time in between children. i follow a lot of francesca naish in terms of fertility management, BFing etc and she suggests a 2 year break from BFing before TTC again - this is in a perfect world though. good to know that others have been absolutely fine with BFing while pregnant.

today i tried skipping the feed after the lunchtime nap - after about 10 minutes of being fussy and trying some diversion he did settle down. i'll keep going with this for a week and then try dropping another feed. thanks for that advice!

i know he will eventually wean. thanks for the reminder :D