A Family Affair : The Unassisted Birth of Blasko Artie Bevin
Friday 11th December 2009
I awoke at 0113 with a tightening that felt immediately different to all the others; more intentional, intense, unable to be ignored. Noting the time in my head, I drifted halfway back to sleep. I knew we were on.
Awoke to another tightening at 0118. Drifted again, but not as far.
At 0122 the next tightening came, and when it had passed, I went to the en-suite. This was it, though we weren't intense yet. I re-lit the two candles I'd used when showering earlier, and sat on the toilet in anticipation of the labour runs, but nothing happened. Another tightening while on the toilet at 0126 - not the most comfortable place. I flushed, started the shower, and went to switch on the low night-light in the bedroom. I poked Pete and said, 'Wake up.' He took a moment before snapping from groggy to [somewhat] alert; 'Are we on?!'
I adjusted the water temperature and stepped into my little labour space, with a feeling I wouldn't be moving from there until after this baby had arrived. Another tightening at 0129, and then they were coming too fast for me to bother noting them.
Pete decided not to set up the video camera as it was too dark to see anything, especially as I was in the shower. I reminded him I wanted it recorded regardless, even just to be able to listen to it later, so he set it up. Reminded him too, to grab the monitor so we could hear Rose. I told him I was excited, and asked if he was, too. He replied, 'I'm still trying to wake up.'
I remember Pete asking if I wanted him to ring the midwife. I just replied, 'Get the towels,' and no more was said. We had decided during pregnancy to do this part on our own unless I felt otherwise when the time came. He fetched the labour box I'd prepared. I remember the bowl for the placenta was sitting at the top, and he was looking for somewhere to place it in the small en-suite. I commented that we wouldn't need it immediately, and he put it behind the door, out of the way.
At some point those runs did start, and there was no way I was moving from the lovely hot water at this point - tightenings were happening thick and fast. My husband, eager to be part of the birth, stepped into the shower with me regardless. What a man.
I remember when I felt a tightening coming on, I'd grab Pete and say, 'Here comes one -- are you ready? I'm going to lean on you - are you ready??' Ha, I don't know what I would have done if he had answered 'No'. I started to get quite loud at this point, and suddenly remembered things about labour with Rose that I had forgotten - the noises were exactly the same, and it was as though they momentarily opened a door to a forgotten part of my memory. My noises woke Rose up, and Pete got her out of bed. [After just listening to the recording of the birth, I'm sure now that the neighbours must have thought we were having some kind of incredible sex session; each contraction sounded like an intense orgasm! Ha!]
While he went to get her, I could feel the burning sensation as my baby's head was crowning. Rose came in to the en-suite disoriented, and my loud noises disturbed her a little. Pete took her out to the bedroom and reminded her about how Mama would be noisy when the baby came, just like in her book ['Hello, Baby' by Jenny Overend, just brilliant!]. After that, she was fine, and keen to be involved. While they were in the bedroom, baby's head came out -- baby's head came out INTO MY HANDS, and it felt like the most normal thing in the world, to be birthing my baby, myself. [That image of my baby's head in my hands will be with me forever, and it still comes to mind every time I see that sweet little head cuddled in against my chest.] I simply said, 'The baby's here. The baby's head is here,' and in they came. Rose was so excited, to see her favourite page of the book, come to life. It was just beautiful beyond words to be there with my little family, ready to welcome this baby. The excitement, the love... the privacy and intimacy... so palpable. Nothing could be more perfect. With the next tightening [0156], our baby was here, a slippery, dark, quiet little body in my arms - and straight after him, the placenta! Just as I said it *wouldn't* be, it came gushing right out behind baby, and Pete had to quickly fumble around for the bowl he'd put out of the way earlier. I held my beautiful baby, and we said hello. The very first thing Rose uttered was, 'Ooo tiny!' Baby made just enough noise for us to know all was ok, and then snuggled quietly against my chest. Blasko. Our little boy. So perfect; so complete.
Pete turned off the shower and wrapped us both in towels, me still squatting over the bowl with the placenta in it, waiting for a last piece of membrane to come out. The air felt cool, so I asked Pete to fetch a hat for Blasko. Of course, Rose had to have one too. And Daddy, too. Having a child at the birth really adds a special something. Rose. So sweet; so adoring and excited.
It wasn't long until the placenta was completely out, and Rose was admiring it keenly; 'Ooh! Beau'iful colour red!' she exclaimed in her excited, high-pitched voice. Pete carried it in the bowl as we moved the few steps from en-suite to bed for cuddles. Rose was very excited - until she noticed Blasko and I both had blood on us. 'Oohh Mama got dirt. Bubba got dirt. Clean it off??!' And with that, she wouldn't cuddle either of us, dirty ferals that we were! Eventually Pete rang our wonderful midwife, who established all was well and that we just wanted to sleep. She promised to come by in the morning.
Blasko and I snuggled in bed while Rose and Pete had cereal and played together. Every now and then, Rose would come running back in to see her new little brother. On one such occasion, as she left the room she cried, 'See ya white cord! Later, cord!' No farewell for Blasko or me, just for his umbilical cord still attached to his placenta! Just before 0600, we needed to cut the cord, as four hours is the maximum time before either preparation or refrigeration if you want to consume the placenta. I had wanted to wait until Blasko was awake, as I didn't like the idea of doing it to him while he was asleep. But he just slept on and on, so I whispered in his ear what we were about to do, and together Pete and Rose cut the cord. They had cut it on a blood clot, and it spurted, causing us all to jump a little, and Rose to cry out, 'Messy!' To this day, she will look at the page of her book where the cord is cut and comment, 'Cut the cord! Blood messy!'
Somewhere around 0700, Rose and Pete came to bed and we all crashed -- well, not completely. Everyone else did, but I was just too high, soaking in the beauty of the moment, I couldn't sleep. It was perfection. Rose had snuggled in against Peter's chest and wordlessly pulled his arm over herself before falling asleep. My brand new little boy was asleep and content at my breast. I felt marvellous.
It was around 0900 when our midwife turned up. She and Pete cleaned the en-suite, much to Rose's relief, and started a load of washing. I had a quick shower [also to Rose's relief!], careful not to wash the chest area too much, and our midwife checked me and Blasko. All well; me, not a single suture required; him, 3780 grams [8lbs 5oz], 50cm long.
I was feeling claustrophobic having not left the bedroom or en-suite yet, so went out to the dining area where our midwife made ham on toast at my request - yum yum! - and we all sat together at the dining table. She filled out her part of the paperwork, and we all chatted for a while before she left.
Pete, Rose, Blasko and I all went out into the backyard. Rose played, Pete did some weeding, and I just enjoyed a little sunshine with my boy; with my family.
It was as though he'd been with us forever. There was a surreal combination of feelings at what had just occurred; awesome empowerment, marvel and euphoria mixed with feeling just how normal, ordinary and every-day, birthing a baby out your vagina was, is, always has been.
It was just another day... with an extra splash of magic.
After the Birth:
Pete prepared the placenta into pills using a variation of the traditional Chinese medicine 'recipe'. My recovery was so incredibly different to when I birthed Rose, my energy levels great, 'baby blues' kept at bay, and lochia was gone at about 18 days. I lost count of how many comments I received on how quickly I was up and about. I attribute it to homebirth ['Does A Yoni Good!' - Emma Kwasnica ;-) ], and placenta pills. The water that was used to steam the placenta was tipped on the garden where a surprise [unintentional, we just tip fruit/veg scraps on the garden] vine was growing, and that vine has now overtaken that part of the garden... and is growing nine watermelons!!!
Fo information on the benefits of consuming the placenta, see:
Placenta Benefits.info - History and Culture of Placentophagy
