Husband and I divided over whether son should move from cot to bed

We have a 17 month old son who is starting to fill up the cot, and whilst I hear a bit of banging in the night as he moves around and finds his position, he does resettle really fast. My husband is really keen to move him into a bed, and has actually bought and assembled it already.
I, myself am really reluctant and don't see my son ready yet, but I also know that we need to get a bit of a move on as I have a newborn that will need it in a few months. Also my reluctance is because I will most likely be the one doing the transition (even though my husband currently puts DS to bed), and feel a bit resentful simply because if I don't see my son ready, then I don't want to be pressured into doing it.
Im keen to know how other people knew their toddler was ready to move into a bed and tips on the what to do.
As it is, to accommodate the new bed, we had to move the cot into a different position of the room and my son has had trouble settling for the last couple of nights as a result of this, hence why Im dreading the bed transition.
In addition, we bought a funky bunk bed from Ikea and have noted that the bottom bunk is more or less futon style and has hardly and distance between the floor and mattress so falling out wont be an issue, but he is likely to roll out - can anyone recommend ideas to use as a barrier? Or should we just leave it open and hope that he gets used to not rolling out at some stage?

Hi there,

Its tough isn't it?

We have just moved our 2 and a half year old son into a bed.

We did so giving him about 8 weeks to adjust before the cot is occupied with babe number 2.

If number 2 had not been on her way I probably would have been similar to you and not preferred not to bother as quickly! But we wanted our son to be settled before number 2 comes along and felt that overall it was the best of the worst solutions in our situation.

Our son is quite a mover in bed too.

He does go to creche and sleep on floor mats there seemingly soundly without too much movement so arguably there is a little bit of what they get used to when they have to.

We graduated the process, firstly taking the side down on the cot, then moving him to a trundle under the bed and then moving him up to the bed itself with a bed guard.

He fell out of the cot with sides down a couple of times and thats all.

I should say too that when we moved from cot to trundle we also moved him into a new room ie new room new big boys bed.

To be honest he rolled out of the trundle which is low off the ground but for which we could not fit with a bedguard (you can buy them from target, kmart or baby shops) and his sleep was at its most interrupted whilst he was on the trundle.

He has slept much better in his big bed with the bedguard on board.

I recall however Divvy making the very statement that she let her boys sleep without a bedguard and they each only fell out once!! I am not sure if they were a little older than your little one though.

We also bought a nightlight which has helped him settle in and has made the process a bit more novel for him IYKWIM?

If you are not up to the move to the bed and its consequences could you come up with a safe but impermanent solution for your newborn eg lend a cot, use an appropriate portacot, co sleep?

Good luck!
Cheerio Belinda.

Depends how soon you will need the cot for next bub!
Also, I haven't moved DD (2yrs) because I know she would be out of bed in a flash at nap times and bed times and anytime she feels like it and I would be the one getting her back in all the time so she stays in the cot! Chn this age don't understand discipline so what would you do if he continually got out of bed at night? Would it be you or your husband getting him to settle in it day and night?
If the mattress to floor distance is small I wouldn't worry about him rolling out!
It will be the first of many issues you will have to compromise on. I think the adult who has to deal with the consequences of decisions get to make them!

I would just give it a go. He may really like it! DS (2.5 yrs) is still in a cot as we are moving in two weeks and didn't want to buy a bed and then have to move that too. But we took one side off the cot. He was much better than expected at going to bed (he just runs out giggling 2-3 times before settling in for good). He rolled out a couple of times but we had some pillows on the side. I thought he would be ok with the rolling thing as he sleeps on the couch/bed for his nap and in his sleep I could see him adjust his position when he rolls so he stays almost in the middle. There is no harm in trying as long as you don't really push it on him. I have found that whenever we make an adjustment in DS' life we talk about it beforehand. For something like this I might talk about it for 3-4 days beforehand but we did it for a month leading up to the dummy throw-away! And the transition is a lot smoother. Good luck!

Give it a go, you still have the cot set up so you can move him back if it doesn't work out.

My DS went into a bed at 18 months of age and it was the first time he ever slept through the night, it was a huge success for us. He still was in his sleeping bag for a little while but we eventually transitioned him out of that. We just had removable bed rails (from Target) either side of the bed, but interestingly he was never as much of a wriggler as he was in the cot once he was in the bed. I think having a pillow helped. We moved him because his night sleep was so bad we didn't think it could get much worse and in the end we wished we'd done it earlier!

We have just moved my DD into a bed this week, she is 15 months old next week. We need the cot for the next one, but she also was not sleeping well at night after previously being fantastic so we thought we'd just try it. Another success story, she slept beautifully all night after only waking up once after a couple of hours, a bit disoriented - so I thought I'd try her with her new pillow because DS took to his straight away - and sure enough, she snuggled down and slept for the rest of the night - we'd started her off flat on the mattress. Once again with her we are keeping her in her sleeping bag for a while so that part of her sleep routine remains the same. And once again we are seeing that she is not moving around around in the bed the same way she moved around in the cot...so I am sticking to my theory that the pillow helps.

It is taking a bit longer to settle her off to sleep at night but not excessively so, we figure this is a temporary thing while she gets used to bed. She loooves it though, she is always going into her room and climbing up and sitting on the bed and bouncing around on it. It's just like going away on holidays, they need a few days to get used to the new surroundings.

My friend told me yesterday about the great idea someone else told her...buy a new pool noodle, and tuck it under the fitted sheet so there is a ledge along the side of the mattress, so they can't roll out. :)

Thanks to all of you that took the time to respond.

So far we have DS having his day nap in the new bed which is working a treat so far. He warmed to the idea immediately.

I would really like to see how he goes in the night time, but contrary to my initial statement, I would like to settle him myself to see how he goes. I could leave it to my husband, but he has only just got the hang of putting him to sleep in the cot, so I dont have the confidence that he will have the patience to do the transition without instruction. I know that sounds really terrible, and DH is more than capable, but my mummy instincts have taken over. Problem is, every time I want to do it, the Newborn wakes up and that takes the priority. The rush (on my behalf) is that my husband goes back to work next week, so Id love any dramas to happen when he doesnt have to go to work. In the same breath, we have ample time as the newborn is only 5 weeks old and wont need the cot for some time.

Marydean - I love love love the idea you have put forward, and most likely will use it if the pillows that we have put around dont work out for us.

Wish me luck! :pray: