I've taken a step back...

Okay, I'm just writing this all down so I can get my head around it all. Don't know if I need advice - maybe just some reassurance or similar experiences.

So, for the last 12 months I've basically offered DS a b/f every 3ish hours - if he wanted it had it, if he didn't that was fine. Having said that, he almost always took it and had a decent feed. However, in the past couple of months he has been less interested in a couple of his feeds. I supposed this was just DS dropping a feed or two.

Now DS is 12 months, I've decided maybe it's time to take a step back and see when he asks for a feed. However, I'm finding he doesn't really ask for feeds much at all.

He has a big feed first thing in the morning, then I feed him to sleep for his morning nap. I feed him to sleep for his afternoon nap. Then I feed him to sleep for the night. These are the only times I'm actually offering a feed, as well as feeding him whenever he wakes at night. In between these times DS doesn't go looking for a feed, and seems perfectly content.

This means DS has gone from feeding 6-8+ times a day, to 4 through the day and ? amount at night very suddenly. I keep feeling like I must be starving him, because he's suddenly having so much less. He has a good appetite for his food though, so I guess he's not going hungry. I think I need to remind myself to trust DS to take the lead.

Is it normal for LOs to drop so many feeds so suddenly?

I think maybe my main problem is wrapping my head around the fact that DS doesn't need as many feeds as he once did. I don't know why I'm finding it so difficult to comprehend.

Sorry for the ramble - it probably didn't make any sense.

Hey sterla,

I was in a similar position to you about a month ago except mine was because of returning to work.

I found it extremely difficult to express at work and after discussions with my MIL, sister and mum (who were looking after DD while I was at work) we thought we'd give it a go with dropping the milk feeds during the day.

So DD went from having 4-6 feeds during the day and sometimes one overnight (though she stopped showing interest in night feeds herself before I went back to work) to just the first thing in the morning and last thing at night feeds.

She has water and cow's milk during the day when I am not there and is perfectly content. So I think even though she went from 4-6 feeds to just 2, she has adjusted really well, which to me means she really didn't need them. Like you, I would offer and she would feed.

Having said all that, last weekend she was completely out of sorts (teeth? hot weather? off colour? growth spurt? who knows...) and had 6 feeds during the day and really wanted them - pulling at my top, whinging, opening her mouth, sucking. So it seems than when she needs it and I am there, she will still feed during the day, but when I am not there, she is content.

You have done a fantastic job to get this far and bf as well as you still are! Maybe you are struggling with what I did when she stopped feeding during the day - my baby doesn't need me as much anymore :( It is a bit of a sad time!!!

It sounds like you guys are going just fine - he's making that adjustment over to more food intake, that's all.

:yeahthat:

I think 4+ feeds for a 12 month old is just fine.

Sounds fine Sterla, My DS is a bit older than yours but he is exactly the same as your DS, I feed him to sleep, at his naps , if I didnt offer he wouldnt ask!
I found that he was having more of a night time though (we co-sleep) and as a result I was getting rather tired and cranky, then I realised if I put a top on to go to bed its not so bad, I think it was just cos they were RIGHT THERE in his face IYKWIM? :lol:

But I have noticed now that he will only wake for one at anywhere between 10pm and 2am, and thats it until about 7-9am. That being said though, he has just come down with a cold (as have I !:shakehead:) and I have noticed that he is pulling at my top all the time and I have only just clicked that DUH!! he wants a feed!! :lol: so he is feeding a bit more often again.

Im scared that if I dont offer, and I have tried a few times, at naptime he will just go without, and I dont really want to stop just yet!

Yep Sterla.... it's the same here too. DD doesn't really ask for it much, some days yes she does but quite often I still ask her if she wants 'booby' every 3hrs just to ensure she's keeping hydrated (in addition to offering her water from her cup).
It is strange isn't it? Going from feeding so much during the day down to only a few a day.... they are busy little adventurers these days.... and eating more food I guess too.

On average, DD has about 3-4 feeds during the day and still has 2-3 at night (which I'm trying desperately to change!!! :o)

Keep up the great work. it all sounds normal to me.... even if you don't ask him does he want any, he'll let you know when he does. Just maybe keep offering water so he is hydrated as they get busy and forget they need it!

Thanks for your replies everyone :grouphug:.

I do 'know' that all is normal with DS. OP, I think you're spot on - it's more about me adjusting to my baby (well, toddler actually) not needing me as much anymore. I think it's hard for me too, because it happened so quickly that he dropped feeds.

Starrysky - you're right - I think I am a bit scared that if I didn't offer, DS would just not want any (well except for in the middle of the night :rolleyes:).

Shanti: :hug: Thanks - glad it's all normal.

Thanks for your replies - I feel better knowing it's all normal. I guess we'll just keep doing what we're doing :).

Sterla, I know where you are coming from. My DS dropped from 8 feeds down to 3-4 around 9 months. It all happened really quickly. But he is eating a lot of solids too so I'm sure he's fine.

Just our little ones getting big I guess. :hug: He still needs you, but just for other things. It does take some adjusting to though. I'm still adjusting to him being so active and feeling like he's not my little baby any more. It's amazing how quickly they grow isn't it?

Sterla, I think that's it for me too - not just adjusting to not being needed as much but it happening so quickly! Hadn't thought about that... :hug:

My DD was on the exact same number of bfs as your DS at his age, except she would only rarely wake up during the night. And she has bf up until nearly four years of age, so I wouldn't worry!

He is a big boy now (at least, he thinks he is!) and he knows where to find you and your bbs when he wants them. Just don't be surprised if he suddenly changes his mind and is back to you every couple of hours in a month's time!

Thanks Jennifer13 - that actually helps a lot. I think because DS dropped feeds so suddenly, I've been worrying that he might wean a lot quicker than I was ready for (haha, notice it's me who has the problem, not DS :rolleyes:).
But if you and your DD are any indicator, I probably have nothing to worry about :).

My DS did the same at about 11ish months, went from feeding 2-3 hrly 24/7 to feeding about 4 times a day and I worried that he was also weaning. But we are still having the same amount of feeds and maybe an extra as he feeds a couple of times overnight :rolleyes:

Sounds like you are doing a wonderful job of following his lead