Trying to convince DH....

Well, I am pregnant again with my 3rd baby. Its only early days but I am thinking about homebirth. I had 2 wonderful experiences in a hospital birthing both my daughters.

DD1 I started off in the birth centre but had mercomium staining so was taken next door to be monitored. I birthed her on a bed (coz I couldnt move back to the floor!). The midwives were great and I think I only saw 1 dr the whole time. Her labour/birth took 15 hours and was at the hospital for 5 hours until I birthed her. I stayed 3 nights.

DD2 I laboured mostly at home. We got to the hospital and I birthed her in the bath after being at the hospital for 2 hours. Her labour/birth was around 6 hours. I stayed for 3 nights.

Now, I had a great experience at the hospital. Booking in for this pregnancy, I have been notified I am no longer in their zone, so have been booked into a different hospital...that I dont particularly like. So I was thinking I could do a homebirth...because if the next one is just as quick, I may as well be at home for it. I didnt have any drugs, any tears/stitches, no medical intervention, so possibly I wont need it this time. I was also thinking that I dont really want to be away from my dd's for too long. I just feel confident that I could do it...and what a wonderful experience it would be.

Dh is quite apprehensive. Not totally against it because he said to me that it up to me because I will be the one who is doing it. However he did voice his concerns about a few things....the first is obviously what happens if something goes wrong. He likes the idea of having the nurses around after the baby is born so I can have a break, or if I need help with b/f... I havent been able to b/f either of my dds for long due to attatchment issues. The other thing is both my dds have been diagnosed with hip dysplasia, picked up shortly after birth. He and I both want to make sure that this bub is not disadvantaged because it hasnt been seen by a paed for its check up. For me this is a big one. DD1 was in a harness for most of her 1st year, which we were lucky enough to have it found early, if its found later then its a much longer process.
Also, how do we prepare, who cleans up the mess (I know its our house, but how do I make it come across that if we prepare then it will be easy to clean).

I have lots of excitement, howvever I am just as nervous about it too. I am confident that I can do it, there is no issue there....its just logistics of it all!

Thanks for listening and any advice would be much appreciated!

all his concerns are where often a HB midwife will excel.
a hb mw is so MUCH more supportive and helpful then the 7+ m/ws you may see on an average hospital stay. you have 1 giving the same constant help and advice.
call them up and have a chat and a coffee(although i do know that a few in vic charge for a chat :rolleyes )

I think those concerns could be worked through. I've heard of HB middies sorting out the washing, grabbing mum something to eat, and all that stuff. I'm not sure how early you have to pick up hip dysplasia, but would a paed appt a few days or week afterwards do?

My experience is in Canada, so things might be a little different here. However, the midwives I saw were EXCELLENT. The care and attention you receive in your prenatal care, and during labour are excellent. They are trained in what to do if something goes wrong.
You can do your research and see for yourself that a healthy mother carrying a healthy baby, being attended by a qualified competent midwife is taking NO extra risks, and is in excellent hands. Showing that sort of thing to your husband might help. Mine is totally won over after being a little reluctant/hesitant. He's convinced that home is definitely the best way to go when you can. :)
My midwives cleaned up any mess left after the birth. They bring blue pads and stuff to absorb any blood or whatever during birth. I gave birth in the bath, so we pulled the plug and rinsed it out, and were good to go.
My midwives also were responsible for post-natal care up to six weeks. They checked baby's hips immediately as part of the post-birth examination (along with palate, reflexes, etc.) They checked on me daily for the first week to keep an eye on nursing, bleeding, weight gain, and any other issues I might have. I also knew that they were available to me at any time if I had a concern. I had their pager and cell numbers. I don't know what is normal for midwives in Aus though - whether post-natal care is standard or not. Regardless, you could easily make an appointment for your baby to see a pediatrician soon after birth if you were concerned.
As far as prep for homebirth goes, some clinics give you a list of supplies to get (extra towels, waterproof pad for bed, etc.) I imagine each midwife has their own way of going about things. I'd highly recommend that you talk to a private midwife in your area and see how she answers your questions. The concerns you have are pretty much the same that everyone has when they first consider a homebirth.
Have you read the articles on homebirth here on BB? They're great!

All the best with your decision!

Thanks girls....I forgot to mention that I have enquired about the homebirth pilot project through Casey Hospital, and also while trying to make an appointment where the girls were born, the lady informed me that they do offer homebirths through this hospital if requested...I was unaware of it for both my other pregnancies. The head midwife is going to call me and have a chat. I also have to ring Casey and find out what their program is about. I am wondering if the hospital led homebirth programs would offer as much support as IMs? We just cant afford an IM at the moment unfortunately...unless....hmm...I go back to work! That might be an option if they have payment plans:) Must go do some researching! I will try and gather some info for dh and i to look through, to settle his nerves!

And I was thinking....if this is our last child we could have it at home and invite my mum and his mum. I think that would be nice. His mum has 3 boys so she hasnt been to any of her grand daughters births! mmm...that might work on him!!!

I sent you a PM with a link that might be helpful to you.

We're going with an IM. I'd advise you to interview a few to see who you gel with and to assure your DH of the safety. Our IM is pretty conservative, but we're happy with that. Many IM's accept a payment plan, some will accept the baby bonus, if you're eligible for it.

The cost for my homebirth includes all ante-natal appts, 2 midwives at the birth (& at the birthplan meeting) and 6 weeks of post-natal appts. So far, we've had 2 x 90 min appts at our house. The IM has booked us into RWH in case of transfer & I've also booked into Monash Medical centre, as it's closer.

What convinced my DH was attending the BB birth options course last year (they don't do them anymore) when he realised the most impt thing was for me to feel safe during birth and I'd feel safer at home.

GL

Hi there! and congrats on the pg!

i recommend getting your hands on a copy of 'the business of being born'. at least, i recommend it because it was the film that totally and completely convinced my DH of the absolute benefits of going ahead with a HB.

Like tashybabe mentioned you can organise with your IM to book through to a hospital for transfer (this cuts out the admin time and lets them know that you are about etc etc).

goodluck!!

Cassius...is that the one with Riki lake as the producer? Might have to pop down to the library:)

yep, that's the one!