need some help with an in laws loss

My sister in law lost a full term baby last year 12hrs after he was born and at the time I thought she seemed to be handling it all too well, but also figured it wasn’t really her style to ‘break down’ IYKWIM?

Anyway fast forward to now (getting closer to the 12 month mark) she called me saying she’s been really *****y and snappy with her husband. So I asked if she thought maybe she hadn’t really dealt with everything that happened last year. She told me she was angry with her husband because he wasn’t there for it (he’s in the army and was over seas when it happened) but she also said she knew it was irrational and not his fault. I tried to explain to her that while it may not be rational its a valid feeling and that when we go through extreme circumstances we can think all sorts of things.

I’ve also suggested she seek help and find someone to talk to about all this. But she’s really not a get and do it kinda girl.

So I need help with 2 things, is there a number or website or something she or I could get in contact with to find someone who deals with this kind of thing for her to talk to? A support group even? I’ve mentioned belly belly to her but its really not her thing.

And the other thing is there maybe a book that deals with death after birth but doesn’t have an overly religious tone to it? I’ve looked but they also seem to have quite a large section devoted to scripture, which again isn’t her thing.

If anyone has read any of my other posts will kind of get I don’t get along with my in laws at all but I am very very very concerned and I know her sisters would be bothering to help her.

So any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks

Bonnie babes has a book on dealing with most kinds of baby loss - Small miracles - I'm not sure if it deals with the situation you described though...

sids & kids have a 24hr support line which i found very helpful when i had my loss,they have a libary as well,so should be able to access some reading material from them as well.Sorry for your sil loss & also for your own losses

omg I had a feeling she was not 'ok'...just got a phone call to say her husband has told her he wants to end the marriage and only married her because of the baby (the one that died)

all I can think of is a word that starts with f and ends with k

I don't know what to do, she's in townsville all of her family are in brisbane but she doesnt want to go there, we're in terrigal...I've said she can come here if she likes (we have a 1brm granny flat)....I don't know what else to say/do...I know we're not close or anything but she must be going through hell and didn't sound 'well' on the phone

OMG your poor SIL toomanyshoes!! Hopefully she will accept some help or comfort from you - sounds like she must really need it right now!